


to the end of reckoning

by CarbonFootprint



Series: i am too alone in the world, and yet not alone enough [2]
Category: Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Angst, Canon Divergence, Conquest Path divergence, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Major spoilers for Conquest path, Soulmates, Spoilers, Support convo spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-16
Updated: 2016-06-18
Packaged: 2018-06-02 11:56:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 50,392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6565171
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CarbonFootprint/pseuds/CarbonFootprint
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Leo knew it especially after that momentary spark of light in the dull spaces of Prince Takumi’s eyes flickered so briefly. Prince Takumi was fighting whatever was possessing him. Somehow he was still alive in his corrupted body, and Leo didn’t have a clue as to how that could be. Perhaps he had discredited the younger Hoshidan prince too easily. Perhaps there was more strength to him than met the eye."</p><p>Conquest Path canon divergence in which no one dies and Takumi is saved: Leo's POV</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HELLO AGAIN. It's me, back at it again with part two of this series wow here we go again
> 
> I have a feeling this part may be longer than part one? Idk yet I honestly don't plan my fics in advance because when I do I feel like it dulls my excitement for it since I already know what happens so I just wing it ;u; It has to be a surprise even more me.
> 
> I hope you all enjoy this first chapter! <3

Father was dead.

Well, technically, Father had been dead for a long, long time, and deep in his subconscious mind Leo had known that for a long while. The Father they knew had become a shell, a vile and twisted entity used as a puppet by forces unknown to anyone it seemed, but even as Corrin’s blade, infused with the strength of his Brynhildr and Xander’s Siegfried, delivered the final blow, Leo still felt the pain of loss deep in his heart. He figured he was technically an orphan then, his mother having been slaughtered by other concubines and his father disposed of by his own children.

He knew that wasn’t completely true. He had Xander and Camilla as more of his parental figures, yet he had never known the feeling of being completely parentless.

It was a strange feeling, a hollow feeling.

And just as soon as they had taken out their own father, they had another enemy on their hands after just a brief moment of peace.

The arrow from Prince Takumi’s bow missed Corrin’s head by barely an inch and suddenly they were on guard again, Xander’s fist around the hilt of his sword, Camilla raising her axe. He held Brynhildr tightly, narrowing his eyes at the possessed Hoshidan in front of them. If it were up to him, he’d kill the other prince right then. Prince Ryoma had been different and there was no need to kill him, but Prince Takumi seemed to be under the same demonic control their father had been. There would be no saving him.

“The _pain_ … of your betrayal,” the possessed prince hissed, “Yours… and mine… It _burns_ …”

“Takumi!” Corrin yelled, obviously trying to reason with him, “The war is over! There’s no need for more bloodshed! King Garon is dead!” Her reasoning proved to be as futile as Leo figured it would be. It was foolish to try and communicate with something that was already dead. He had learned that with their father just as Xander had, and it had taken a toll on their entire family.

“He is possessed, sister,” Leo sighed, “Likely by the same force that corrupted father. There is no saving him.” He figured it would be better to break the news to Corrin slowly, but they didn’t have that much time. Prince Takumi was still lethal, the strength of his arrows from his regalia magnified by whatever was using his body. A blow from one of the arrows would kill easily; there was no doubt about that.

“I must… I will… kill you… KILL YOU!” Prince Takumi roared again, raising his weapon, “I will… kill you, lost sister… Die Corrin!”

An arrow formed on the string, the light of it demonic as the corrupted soul in front of them. Leo felt his body tense, ready to shove Corrin out of the way or attack Prince Takumi himself. This was Corrin’s other little brother, but he still had a duty to protect her as the brother she had chosen over Hoshido. Loyalty over family had it’s cost and, for Corrin, having to kill a member of her birth family would be the price to be paid.

The next instant something shifted on the room, or rather the change came from Prince Takumi’s body itself. There was a burst of light in his eyes, weak but persistent, there for a second before it was gone again, but Leo caught it just before it faded. The arrow on the bowstring dissipated into the air before the bowstring itself did as well, leaving the bow useless to the body of the prince who was destined to wield it.

“No... My… Fujin Yumi…” Prince Takumi seemed as confused as the rest of them before his face contorted with rage, “NO!” His roar echoed through the Hoshidan throne room and Leo heard Elise gasp in fear behind him.

"Takumi," Corrin breathed then, her voice plaintive and begging.

There was something there to be saved.

Leo knew it especially after that momentary spark of light in the dull spaces of Prince Takumi’s eyes flickered so briefly. Prince Takumi was fighting whatever was possessing him. Somehow he was still alive in his corrupted body, and Leo didn’t have a clue as to how that could be. Perhaps he had discredited the younger Hoshidan prince too easily. Perhaps there was more strength to him than met the eye. He did wield a weapon as powerful and sacred as he and Xander did. Perhaps there was something more to him, but there wouldn’t be anything left if they couldn’t save him.

"Your brother is not gone, sister," Leo finally said, "Prince Takumi may be salvageable yet." He didn’t want to ignite too much hope inside Corrin. Obviously most of Prince Takumi was gone, warped and destroyed by the demon using him, but whatever there was left wanted to live.

"I may be able to help," Azura murmured, stepping forward from behind Corrin, "My song can weaken whatever is controlling him, but you have to force it out."

"How?" Corrin asked desperately, her eyes going to Azura then, "Physically?"

"Yes, unfortunately," Azura sighed.

"But that alone could kill him!"

"At least, if he does succumb, he will die as himself," Leo cut in. There wasn’t time to deliberate, no time to argue about what could be best for the possessed Hoshidan. If Corrin wished him to be saved, or attempted to be saved, they had to move fast, "I will do it, sister, if only to take the weight from your shoulders."

He supposed that had always been his role, protecting Corrin from the things that would hurt her too much to do. He had covered for her with Kaze and the other Hoshidan warrior when their father ordered them to be killed by Corrin’s hand. He had taken care of Prince Ryoma’s fate ordered by their Father and Iago. He had saved Prince Ryoma for Corrin, only for Corrin, because he loved her and she loved her true older brother. He would do this too. He couldn’t bear the truth of Corrin’s soul darkening like his own and Xander’s and Camilla’s. They had been doing Father’s bidding for years. He had killed countless, and he knew Xander had killed countless more, all in the name of the shell of their Father.

He could do this.

He could save Corrin from the blackness that he knew had already started to encroach on his own soul. Should Prince Takumi die, it would be on his hands, and if he were to live, then he would have done some good for once, a new step in the direction Nohr would take into the future, a path of light.

Azura’s song filled the air and it was immediately chased by Prince Takumi’s screams, hollow and resonating from the corruption that hampered his soul. It was a tortured sound, the sound of agony and misery to an extent that Leo had never heard before.

It was slightly terrifying to think that so much self-hatred and fear and longing for a sister who was stolen away, and then another betrayal on top of that, could do this to a person. Leo briefly wondered if maybe, if Corrin had left them and turned to Hoshido instead, would he become the same way? Corrin had always said he and Prince Takumi were alike in nature, though he failed to really see it.

Would they have been alike in this fate?

Would he have become a monster too?

He forced the thoughts away. There were more pressing matters at hand. Azura’s song was nearly over and he had to act fast.

Brynhildr was by far the most powerful tome he had ever used, and it should be considering its status as one of the five regalia. It took energy from his body and channeled it into the numerous spells available to him. He had seldom used the tome to save rather than kill, and suddenly he froze.

He didn’t know which spell to use.

So many of them would kill Prince Takumi without giving him even a chance at life. There was nothing he could do.

But there was, and suddenly he remembered a spell in the tome he had yet to ever use simply because whenever he had tried it wouldn’t work. It was strange, written in a language he could scarcely understand, but from pouring over it he had deduced it was a spell for good rather than utmost harm.

It would have to do. It would have to work this time.

There was no time left to think.

The magic left his palm like nothing from his tome had before. Using a spell had always seemed so easy, especially a spell from Brynhildr. It was effortless and painless, but when this spell left his fingers, he felt something inside him almost tear, ripping away from his body to hit Prince Takumi’s, sending the Hoshidan prince flying backwards and to the ground. His entire hand and arm felt numb, tingling from the affects of whatever spell he had used, but he couldn’t worry about himself then. He tried to curl his fingers only to hiss in pain. Every nerve ending felt like it was on fire and numb at the same time, but he wasn’t the only one in the room feeling pain.

Prince Takumi’s screams persisted only for a moment before Leo could discern a break in the sound, a change, as if the hold on him was shattering under the combined force of Azura’s song and his own spell. He watched as Prince Takumi’s body stiffened on the ground, arching against the floor as if something invisible was being pulled from him, severing whatever anchor the possession had on his soul. All sound from his body died out and he went limp against the ground. From the corner of his eye, Leo saw Corrin move, running for the boy she called brother and he had no choice but to chase after her.

There was a slight tremble to Prince Takumi’s body as he lay on the ground, his eyes barely open and his lips drawing in tiny, feeble breaths. He was alive. Leo hadn’t killed him. A weight was lifted from his heart and he knelt down besides the other prince as Corrin had.

"Takumi? Takumi?" Corrin called softly, reaching out to shake her brother’s shoulder lightly. Prince Takumi didn’t respond for a long moment before Leo saw his gaze shift slowly. His amber eyes were dulled with exhaustion and pain, but there was light in them that hadn’t been there before. It was light that had been stolen from him and then restored by Leo’s hand. He had done that. He had helped Prince Takumi to live.

Those amber eyes moved slowly before they finally landed on him, gazing up and connected with his own. In that instant, he felt pain blooming in his chest. It wasn’t like any physical pain he had ever experienced and it was awful. It was sadness and misery and tortured pain, wretched unhappiness that managed to crush every aspect of love down to almost nothing.

His heart ached.

His heart ached and seared for Prince Takumi almost to a point where he could feel the imminence of tears in his eyes. He suddenly had the desire to reach out, to soothe the other prince, but the feeling vanished almost entirely in a second, fading away to almost nothing, a dull ache and nothing more as Prince Takumi’s eyes slipped shut into unconsciousness.

“Takumi? _Takumi_! Wake up!” Corrin yelled, turning her brother onto his back, her fingers moving to check for his pulse at his neck before she pressed her head to his chest, her red eyes closed as she waited and listened. She sat up shakily after a while, a quiet breath leaving her lips, “He’s- he’s alive. He’s alive but I- I’ve never heard anyone’s heart beating that- slowly. He’s barely breathing…”

Those facts struck Leo hard and he stared down at the unconscious prince. Had he truly saved Prince Takumi after all? From what Corrin was saying, the boy was on the verge of death, his skin pale and cold, his chest barely rising and falling.

“Perhaps this would be a good time to fetch Prince Ryoma,” Xander’s voice sounded from where he stood close to Corrin, his eyebrows drawn close together and his face troubled, “He will want to tend to his brother.”

“Right,” Corrin whispered, “Right… Ryoma…”

“I’ll get him!” Elise offered quickly before she ran from the throne room. She returned only moments later with Prince Ryoma in tow. The high prince of Hoshido looked worse for wear. There was a limp to his gait and he sported multiple wounds from his fight with Corrin, yet any pain he appeared to have been feeling disappeared from his face when his eyes landed on his brother.

“Takumi!” His yell bounced around the walls of the Hoshidan throne room as he ran towards where they were still at Prince Takumi’s side. Prince Ryoma fell to his knees too easily, and Leo could see the way his hands were trembling even as they paused with what to do over the body of his brother, “What happened to him? Corrin? You told me he was _fine_. You told me he had _escaped_.” He reached then and pulled the younger prince into his arms, cradling him close.

“He was possessed by some sort of entity. We surmise it was the same power that had possessed our father for so many years. We believe we have managed to force this entity from his body, but as it did with our father, it clearly takes a- a physical toll,” Leo explained when no one else spoke up, “He was awake for a moment, but he lost consciousness shortly after.”

“He barely breathes,” Ryoma whispered almost to himself, “I must get him to whatever healers remain in the palace urgently. Perhaps they can help him.” He stood quickly with Prince Takumi still in his arms despite the strength that he had lost in the battles fought that day.

“Big brother,” Corrin called before he could depart, “The war is over. My siblings mean no harm to anyone, surely you see that now?”

“Yes, I do,” Ryoma sighed, “But my biggest concern right now is my own family.” Leo saw the way Corrin flinched slightly when Ryoma referred to his family, his Hoshidan siblings. It was Corrin’s family still, but the sting of her betrayal was obvious even in Prince Ryoma’s level voice. Leo knew it would take a long time for the wounds of the war to close. This was just the beginning; a start to what would hopefully heal both nations, but this new start could very well begin with the death of one of Hoshido’s royal family.

And that blood would be on his own hands.

“What can we do then?” Corrin asked, “Please, big brother. We can help.”

“You can,” Ryoma relented, giving her a nod, “If you would, please go find Hinoka, Sakura, and their retainers, and Takumi’s as well. They are no doubt injured and afraid of what they do not know about the events that had taken place here today. Tell them that I am fine and that it is safe to come home. Please do this for me.”

“O-of course,” Corrin stammered out, “Brother, I-”

“We have not conquered your kingdom, Prince Ryoma,” Xander said then, stepping out in front of Corrin, “This tactic Corrin and Azura played was the only way to reveal to my siblings and I the truth about out father. It was the only way to stop the true downfall of your kingdom and ours. I am sorry to you and your family that we had to be deceitful with our actions, and I am sorry that your brother’s life may be the price to be paid for-”

“That is _enough_ ,” Ryoma said hoarsely, “I appreciate your words, Prince Xander. I appreciate knowing that Hoshido is still my kingdom, but you have no right to speak about my family, especially not now. I must go. Takumi needs help.” With that, Prince Ryoma left the throne room as quick as he could judging from the awkward angle of his gait. He clearly needed a healer almost as much as Prince Takumi did.

“We should do as Prince Ryoma requested then,” Xander said after a moment, “I’m sure it would be best for the princesses to see you, Corrin.”

“Right,” Corrin sighed, and Leo could hear the defeat in her voice. Maybe they won the war in a sense, but Corrin had clearly lost the people she had called family for only a short amount of time, and that toll was obvious on her.

“It will be alright, sister,” he said, forcing a smile, “It will take time, but now that there is peace, things will get better.” Whether his words helped or not didn’t show on Corrin’s face. She simply sheathed her sword and started walking from the room, and they had no choice but to follow behind her.

* * *

 

By nightfall, Castle Shirasagi and the surrounding town was more of a massive infirmary than a kingdom’s capital. They had found Princess Hinoka and Princess Sakura and brought them home. Prince Takumi’s retainers had been badly injured, but they were strong enough to hang on for help. They didn’t take too lightly to seeing Corrin though, clearly still distrustful of Nohrians. Princess Sakura had already healed her retainers by the time they found her to take her back to the castle. The entire atmosphere of place was grim, filled with the stench of blood mixed with herbal scent of salves and the constant glow of healing rods. Elise had offered to help heal people, but most Hoshidans who were conscious were still wary of a Nohrian healing them. Their suspicion was warranted though, Leo supposed, and after a while Elise dejectedly stood with them to just watch what was happening.

Eventually Prince Ryoma reemerged from deeper in the castle, his face grim and his own wounds healed a bit.

“Big brother!” Princess Sakura gasped and ran towards him. Corrin followed with Princess Hinoka so they all followed, out of place and surrounded by those they called enemies only hours earlier.

“Sakura,” Prince Ryoma breathed, easily grabbing her into a strong hold, “Thank the gods you’re alright. You and Hinoka both. Thank you, Corrin, for finding them.” He smiled then, but Leo saw how the expression didn’t meet his eyes and his heart dropped a bit.

 What exactly had happened? Did Prince Takumi perish, or was he still alive? He didn’t know why he cared so much. He had killed countless before. He had struck enemies down without a care in the world, but for some reason now his mind kept going back to Prince Takumi over and over. Even when he tried to direct his brain to think of something else, he kept coming around full circle to Prince Takumi.

“There’s no need for thanks,” Corrin said softly, “We’re… family.” There was a softness that came to Ryoma’s eyes than and he gave a nod in the direction of their sister. Perhaps close bonds could heal more easily than others. There was no ire left in Prince Ryoma’s voice that Leo could detect after all. Perhaps healing could just be that easy, but he didn’t think he could naively believe that.

“Big brother? Wh-where’s Takumi?” Sakura asked then and it seemed the air around them grew even more stagnant with the nature of her question.

“Takumi is- he’s,” Prince Ryoma started and before he could even continue there were tears in Princess Sakura’s eyes, “The healers say there’s nothing they can do for him… We just- have to make him comfortable until he… Until he moves on.”

“No!” Princess Sakura screamed, her voice breaking into a sob before she buried her face in Ryoma’s chest, “N-no… No, _please_!”

“Ryoma, y-you can’t be serious,” Princess Hinoka whispered, her normally strong voice shaking. Prince Ryoma didn’t answer after that, his head hanging low as he wrapped an arm around Sakura and offered his hand to Hinoka.

Prince Takumi was… dying?

So he hadn’t done anything good after all. His spell had forced whatever was controlling the Hoshidan prince from his body, but he couldn’t save him.

He was still dying.

Leo didn’t know why it bothered him so much. Why did it bother him so? Why was his heart aching?

Maybe because everything could’ve gone differently. Maybe because for once he allowed himself to hope that he had saved a life rather than causing one to end. A tremor went through the hand he had used to cast the spell and he curled his fingers into a fist, forcing the prickling feeling away.

“Can we go see Takumi, big brother?” Princess Sakura sniffled once her hard sobs had slowed into whimpers, “P-please?”

“Yes, of course,” Prince Ryoma nodded, “Let us go. Corrin, you as well. Come say- come say good-bye to our brother.”

Corrin followed after Prince Ryoma and her Hoshidan siblings so Leo and their siblings had no choice but to follow as well. It was better than being surrounded by hostile Hoshidans who had been wounded by Nohrian combatants. They reached Prince Takumi’s quarters and the Hoshidan royals and Corrin followed Prince Ryoma into the room. Surely it would be awkward to follow after them so Leo waited in the hall with Xander, Camilla, and Elise.

He could see Prince Takumi from where he was standing outside the open door. The Hoshidan prince was laying in a bed, the blankets pulled up to his shoulders and his obscenely long hair spread out over the pillows. His skin was pale, a deathly white, and his eyes were closed, his pale lips parted as his chest weakly rose and fell. Prince Ryoma’s words sank in even deeper then.

Prince Takumi was dying.

He was going to die.

And Leo had effectively caused that to happen.

He had killed him.

He could only hope that none of the Hoshidan royals came to that conclusion as he had. They would likely have trouble with diplomacy if they regarded him as the murderer of one of their high princes.

“B-big brother?” Princess Sakura was at Prince Takumi’s side then, grasping his hand in her own, “H-hey, big brother… Wake up… P-please wake up.”

“Sakura,” Corrin murmured, “He’s not- going to...”

Princess Sakura’s quiet sobs filled the room again and Leo felt Elise’s hand grip onto his own from where she stood behind him. He squeezed her smaller fingers gently, turning to her with a sad smile on his lips.

“Promise me you won’t ever go away, Leo,” she whispered, her violet eyes dark and desolate, “Please?” There was no happiness on her face as there usually was. It was a strange look, one that made his own soul darken. He never wanted to see his little sister that grey again.

“I promise,” Leo said, taken aback at the hoarseness of his own voice. He cleared his throat, squeezing her hand away, “I will never leave you, Elise.” He would do anything to stop his own family from feeling the kind of pain transpiring in Prince Takumi’s room.

He would do anything and yet he knew he could do nothing. There was no changing fate. He had tried to save Prince Takumi, but the other boy was still going to perish eventually. He had failed, and he wasn’t sure if he would fail again or not. It was humbling and painful, and he tore his gaze away from the room in front of him, focusing on the toes of his boots instead.

* * *

 

They were given quarters to sleep in for the night, but Leo barely even pulled out the blankets. Prince Ryoma was being hospitable despite all that had happened that day and had told them they could stay through the night, heal anyone who was injured, and head back to Nohr the next day. He was a kind man; Leo recognized that, and he knew Prince Ryoma would make a trusted ruler of Hoshido, one that could even be trusted by Nohr, but how much would the death of his brother dull his soul?

He knew Father had been wracked with grief. He had lost Xander’s mother. He had loved too hard and too often, prompting the concubine mothers of all his children to kill each other and his own progeny. He had grown dark and twisted and evil, and it had all started by the loss of someone he loved.

Leo couldn’t imagine Prince Ryoma going down the same path, but the Hoshidan royals were all so close, united under the threat of war and death from Nohr. Prince Takumi’s inevitable demise would change him; there was no doubt about that.

He tried to sleep that night but he just couldn’t. His mind was too awake, filled with worries and thoughts and fears. He worried for Prince Takumi and for Corrin. He feared for himself, for what would happen to his heart and soul once Prince Takumi’s spirit eventually perished. He thought about Prince Takumi. He thought about how Corrin always claimed they could have been good friends.

Fate was truly bent on sadness and pain rather than happiness.

His father had said something like that to him once. He didn’t quite remember the context, just Father’s words.

_“Happiness is the enemy.”_

_“It will weaken you, boy.”_

_“It is vile. It puts doubt in your mind. You mind is your most important asset.”_

_“Do not be foolish and listen to your heart.”_

_“You will then have something to lose.”_

_“Your foes will use that against you._

_“Your foes will destroy you, and all because you let them. Understand?”_

_“Yes, Father.”_

His father couldn’t have been correct though. There was no way that happiness could be the enemy. There was no way that feeling alive and strong and glad could possible be equated to weakness.

He wasn’t happy though. He didn’t know the last time he had been happy. He felt a certain number of emotions he could liken to happiness like that of his pride, of the satisfaction after besting an enemy or winning a battle, but that wasn’t the same.

Come morning, he had barely closed his eyes but to blink all night. His siblings didn’t look very well rested either, but Xander still accepted Prince Ryoma’s hand and thanked him for his hospitality before they set off. There had been no sign of Princess Hinoka or Princess Sakura, and before Castle Shirasagi was even out of sight from their carriages, Ryoma had disappeared behind locked doors.

Hoshido was torn, ravaged by war, bleeding and crying out for a healing touch. That couldn’t start until they had left, until their Nohrian presence was gone from the once peaceful land.

Elise chattered most of the ride back that day, mostly about how Xander was going to be king and they would have a big party for him and she would get a new dress to wear. Eventually, she wore herself out and fell asleep on Camilla’s lap, and their carriage was silent until they arrived back at Castle Krakenburg.

As he stepped from the carriage, Leo knew he was home, but it didn’t feel like it, not anymore.

Father was dead. The war was over, but nothing was as it should be. There was no light, no happiness.

Nohr was still as dark and cold as before.

He reached his quarters in the castle and he was too exhausted to not sleep. He removed his armor, briefly wondering when the next time he would have to wear it would be before he set it against the wall. Odin or Niles could collect it later. He was too tired to think about anything right then except sleeping in the bed that was familiar to him. He wouldn’t have to wake in the morning and go fight. He wouldn’t have to head out to the battlefield with the ever-present fear of never coming back.

With that, he fell asleep, allowing himself that momentary peace. It was dark in his dreams, peaceful, a feeling he had not experienced for a long time. Slowly, his mind started to materialize something in the distance, the shape of a person.

He squinted in the dim light of his own dream, his eyes narrowed as he started moving forward, closer to the figure in the distance. He stopped short when he could make out the person, their features completely distinguishable.

It was Prince Takumi as he had seen him in the war, before his eyes had been clouded by hatred and possession, and then closed forever into his imminent death.

Did he sincerely feel that guilty about what had happened?

Was Prince Takumi truly weighing so heavily on his conscious that he would even seen him in the subconscious world of his dreams?

“I tried!” He yelled before he could stop himself, “I _tried_ to save you!”

Prince Takumi didn’t move. Of course he wouldn’t. It was a dream that was turning out to be more like a nightmare. Slowly, the image of the other prince faded with Leo’s thoughts and he fell into a dreamless state. When he woke in the morning, he only felt slightly rested, the feeling of an unsatisfied discomfort deep in his bones. He would rather lay in bed all day and forget the world, forget his actions the day before, forget about Prince Takumi and his predestined fate.

He couldn’t do any of those things though. He had duties to perform for Nohr. He had let that spell leave his hand. He had sentenced the Hoshidan prince to death, and apparently his mind constantly wanted to remind him of that.

It would get better, he figured. In time, everything wore away, and slowly his guilt would too.

The day was long and tense. It was strange to not be at war, but there was too much to be done. He was at Xander’s side most of the day while they planned details for the coronation and for the beginnings of Nohr’s rebuilding. The work was tiring and mind numbing, but at least it let him forget for a little while.

When he tried to sleep the next night, the same thing happened as the night before. Prince Takumi was there, unmoving, simply put there to haunt him. He had tried to save him. He had tried for Corrin, for Corrin’s other family, for Hoshido for the sake of Nohr.

He woke before dawn and pressed his face into his hands, whispering apologies into his palms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter two may be a bit slower to come out! It's the last week of the semester and I have three exams this week, but after that I'll have time because summer classes don't start for a few weeks ;u;
> 
> Thank you for reading!!! Any comments and kudos are so very very appreciated like so much wow thank you <3


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OOOOOOKAY this was the chapter that I was kind dreading writing because I'm lazy and i didn't want to rehash all the support convos again bUT I DID IT. And it got really really long this is almost 7k words I don't know why but I couldn't find a good way to split it up so yep he is 7k of Leo being generally confused and sad.
> 
> Enjoy!!! <3

The invitations for Xander’s coronation were sent out a week after the war ended. Nohr was still bleak and cold, ravaged by constant winter storms that dumped new feet of snow onto their land every few days. A week of work seemed to do nothing for their kingdom, and it annoyed Leo to no end.

He couldn’t believe that Father and Iago had done such a terrible job with the nation, but when he took his horse out one day to patrol through some of the lower town, all he saw were impoverished Nohrians fighting for scraps, or just fighting because they had nothing left to live for. His own country made his stomach twist and his blood boil, and he wondered if the war had been for nothing.

Of course it had been for nothing. Father, or whatever had taken over him, had started a needless assault on a once peaceful land, and that had stripped resources from their own people. The war had taken men from their wives and children, boys from their parents, and sent them to fight until they couldn’t anymore.

For the glory of Nohr.

There was no glory.

There was no positive aftermath, no instant change.

When the invitation sent to Hoshido came back with a letter from Ryoma addressed to Corrin and the rest of her siblings, it became even more obvious that nothing had changed. Prince Ryoma had declined their invitation on the grounds that he nor any of his siblings would come to Nohr. He claimed they were still dealing with casualties and an on-going family tragedy that didn’t need to be said to be realized. He promised to send some representatives from Hoshido, likely his retainers, but no royalty would be present at the ceremony.

Xander accepted the fact honorably, penning a letter to Prince Ryoma himself acknowledging his obligations. He was truly the perfect crown prince and future king Father had raised him to be, Leo realized then, and maybe his strength could bring life back to Nohr.

In the week leading up to the invitations being sent out, Leo slept a grand total of two nights, not including the accidental naps he took in the library. It was too hard to sleep, too painful to see his brain’s apparition of Prince Takumi appear in his mind every time he tried to close his eyes. The other prince always looked like he was sleeping, his eyes closed and face serene. Leo had tried to reach out and touch him once only to jerk awake in bed, his skin covered in sweat and his breathing erratic in his chest.

He didn’t sleep for two nights after that. It was too hard, and his guilt wasn’t fading over time like he had anticipated.

He knew it would take more than a week, but he didn’t know how long he could manage.

After that first miserable week, he went to the infirmary and asked the clerics there to make a sleeping draught for him. If anything, it would force his mind to rest. He couldn’t be of any help to Xander if he wasn’t well rested after all. Xander had been commenting on his tired look all week and it was getting bothersome. It seemed like what had happened to Prince Takumi had affected all his siblings in a way that made them pay more attention to him specifically. He didn’t understand it. Just because he and Prince Takumi were around the same age and both second princes in their families didn’t mean they were anything alike.

For one, he would keep living for the foreseeable future. That was something they didn’t have in common.

He drank the sleeping draught before he went to bed that night, forcing his eyes to close as he lay in bed. Eventually, sleep claimed him and he welcoming it, too exhausted at that point to fight with his thoughts anymore.

He blinked open his eyes and he was in a hallway. The walls were dark stone, clearly Nohrian in origin, but it was no hall from the castle that he had ever recognized. He started walking because there was nothing else to do. He was dreaming and if this was what his mind wished to show him, he would accept it.

“Ah,” a soft huff came from behind him, “So if it isn't Prince Leo of Nohr…” He turned quickly and staggered back a step in shock at the other prince standing there. Prince Takumi was watching him with cold but curious eyes, his lips set in a small frown and his arms crossed over his chest. He didn’t look like he was on the verge of death. Rather, he looked quite healthy.

“Prince Takumi of Hoshido. I'm pleased to make your acquaintance,” he answered stiffly. Was this how his guilt would torment him now? His mind had created a Prince Takumi that even sounded like him and would speak to him. He supposed he had never actually spoken to Prince Takumi on neutral or civil grounds so it wouldn’t hurt to exchange introductions really. Though, he didn’t know why he even spoke. This wasn’t real. It would never be real. Prince Takumi was dying.  

Prince Takumi rolled his eyes at his words nonetheless, clearly not dying in that exact moment, and he let out a humorless huff of laughter at his words. The other prince truly was as rude as the rumors had claimed. _Perfect…_

“We might as well get this out of the way. You are I are not going to be friends,” Leo said then, his eyes narrowing. He crossed his own arms over his chest, glaring at the boy in front of him. Corrin was wrong. There was no way they could ever be friends. Not after the war, not after what he had done with his own hands.

"What a coincidence!" Prince Takumi laughed, a harsh, unpleasant sound that Leo figured wasn’t what he truly sounded like when laughing from joy rather than spite, “I was just thinking the same thing."

"Of course you were,” Leo gritted out, “You have such an arrogant attitude and-"

" _Me_? I'm not the one going around patronizing everyone! You're the jerk!" Prince Takumi countered before Leo could even finish speaking. How could he be anything like this boy? He was belligerent and outwardly angry at the world.

It dawned on Leo then that maybe his own Father was to blame, and he and his siblings as well. Corrin had been stolen from Hoshido, fracturing the entire semblance of their family. Prince Takumi’s father had been killed, and then his mother, all by his own Father’s actions. Corrin had come back to Hoshido only to betray them and leave again. He could see the hurt in Prince Takumi’s eyes. He had seen that hurt first hand when the other boy had been possessed, twisted by pain and anger and abandonment.

Still, that didn’t mean the other prince had to be so- so… _Insufferable_.

“Is that the best you can do?" He sneered back, lips curled into a haughty smirk, "You sound like a whiny, little brat. Just as expected. Let's make a deal. You stay away from me and I'll stay away from you. Think you can manage?" He saw the way Prince Takumi’s eyebrows shot up from their narrowed position in surprise before he scowled again, his eyes dark with anger.

"I'm not going to let you boss me around like that!” He nearly shouted, “Good-bye!" With that, the other prince turned away, storming off down the dark hall, his ponytail swaying behind him.

“Insufferable… Truly insufferable,” Leo muttered. He sighed then only for his dream to shatter and suddenly he was awake, laying in his bed with the blankets twisted around him. He sat up slowly, testing the tired ache in his muscles only to find none there. He had slept and slept well at that, through the night too judging by the light he could see from between the curtains.

What the hell did he dream about? He had been talking to Prince Takumi, actually communicating with him as if the other prince wasn’t laying in his deathbed a kingdom away. His eyes landed on the vial that once contained the sleeping draught on the table besides his bed and he snatched it up, flicking the lid open to take a whiff of the remnants. He couldn’t discern the smells of any ingredients that would cause him to experience such vivid psychosis, but there must have been something in the tonic that made his dreams so lucid.

He dressed for the day and, before breakfast, stormed off to the infirmary, the empty vial clutched in his palm.

“This did not suffice,” he said tersely, setting the bottle down sharply, causing the cleric in front of him to flinch lightly, “Ready something that works before midnight tonight if you will.” With that, he turned and left the infirmary. There was work to be done. He couldn’t have Prince Takumi occupying his thoughts in anyway.

His mission to keep the Hoshidan prince banished from his head proved futile when he found himself in a conversation with Corrin about her Hoshidan siblings during lunch. Camilla and Elise were having a tea party in Elise’s room for lunch and Xander had decided to forgo it that day, leaving him alone with Corrin.

“You may keep denying it, but you and Takumi are- _were_ very much alike,” Corrin shrugged, “Trust me, Leo… Don’t roll your eyes!”

“You keep saying these things, sister, but from what I experienced of Prince Takumi, there was absolutely nothing the same about us.”

“You didn’t get to know him,” she started before Leo huffed again.

“And did you? You left Hoshido soon after you were reunited with your other family, and from what you have told me, Prince Takumi was rather hostile towards you at all times.”

“I can’t really blame him for that,” Corrin murmured, her eyes growing sad at Leo’s words, “I was a basically stranger to him. He was my younger brother after all. He didn’t quite remember much about me being taken, and I think he forced himself to forget, whereas Hinoka wouldn’t let anyone forget.”

“I fail to see how that makes us anything alike,” Leo muttered.

“Well, you both care about me, and all of our siblings, even if you think no one sees it. I know you feel… left out a lot of the time. Takumi was the same way.”

“I fail to see how a common character trait, or flaw on some part, makes us similar in any way. You’re reaching here, sister, and I won’t have it.” He stood from the table, gathering up the books he brought to read when he thought lunch would be the quiet affair it usually was. Talking about Prince Takumi wouldn't make his feelings of guilt any better. The only thing that would make it better would be just to forget completely, which proved difficult when his sister and his dreams keep him thinking on the topic.

There was a new vial of tonic sitting besides his bed when he entered his chambers past midnight. He eyed it warily as he dressed for bed, wondering if it had truly been the draught the night before that had given him the dreams or the fault of his own guilty conscience. He hesitantly picked it up and breathed out a sigh. He had to drink it if he wanted to sleep more than a few hours after all. That day after his lunch with Corrin had been filled with plans for Xander’s coronation and it had been truly draining, and the next day would prove to be exactly the same he figured. At least his apparition of Prince Takumi had given him some change in his life after the war, even if it did increase the ever-present ache in his heart. Every day seemed to go on so slowly and it seemed like life was only getting slower.

He downed the sweet tonic and set the empty vial on the table again, sliding beneath the sheets and blankets. His thoughts drifted back to Corrin’s words then, about how he and Prince Takumi were so alike. It was preposterous, a ridiculous notion.

“I can't believe she said that to me. I have nothing in common with that imbecile,” he huffed under his breath before he realized he was back in the same hall as before, surrounded by dark, stone walls, “Just because Prince Takumi and I are both royalty doesn't mean we're anything alike. Ugh!" He cursed under his breath, roughing toeing at a crack in the floor with his boot as stewed with his thoughts.

“"Muttering to yourself, Prince Leo?" He jerked his head up at the sound of Prince Takumi’s voice again only to see the other prince standing there, leaning against the wall with his arms crossed over his chest again, a bemused look on his face that lacked his usual ire, "What's the matter? Couldn't find anyone else willing to talk to you?" he sounded like he was teasing just to tease rather than to make fun, but why would he do that? They weren’t enemies, not anymore, but they weren’t friends or even acquaintances in good standing.

“You!” He scowled, "I didn't know you were there. Why were you eavesdropping?"

"Well, it all sounded a bit too familiar," Prince Takumi said slowly, his face holding a contemplative look, "It seems we've both been hearing that same joke for a while."

"They're calling us 'the twins,'" Leo continued, huffing as he crossed his arms in front of his chest, "We can't let them treat is this way! They're wrong!" He didn’t know why he said ‘them’ rather than just Corrin, but he was pretty sure Ryoma had compared them once, and maybe their other siblings had caught onto the joke too, but that didn’t mean anything.

"Of course they are," Prince Takumi said like it was obvious, "You and I couldn't be more different!"

"Naturally!" Leo huffed out, crossing his arms over his chest and averting his gaze. Truthfully, he knew nothing about Prince Takumi other than the fact that he was second high prince of Hoshido, relatively around the same age as him, and that he also wielded a scared weapon. He didn’t know what kinds of foods he preferred, what games he played, what color appealed to him most. They were strangers, but maybe it wouldn’t hurt to change that, "B-by the way,” he started, “Can I- ask you one thing?"

"Wh-what?"

“Prince Takumi, what's your favorite food?" He forced the words out quickly, looking away from the other prince when he felt his cheeks burn lightly at his own embarrassment.

"Well, I like miso soup…" Prince Takumi said after a long moment of thought.

“Miso soup?” Leo echoed, his eyes narrowing in confusion. It was undoubtedly Hoshidan. He had never heard of anything like that in Nohr.

"Yeah," Prince Takumi hummed, a soft smile coming to his lips that Leo suddenly realized suited him very well, much better than a frown anyway, "It’s a dish where you put miso and slices of dried bonito in broth, season it, and boil it with some vegetables and tofu," he recited easily, smiling a bit wider afterwards before his smile dimmed a bit and some of the light left his eyes. Leo suddenly wanted to rush forward, to touch him and bring that light back to his amber eyes. He couldn’t do that though. That would be inappropriate. They hardly knew each other. Still, he wasn’t heartless. He could at least inquire.

“"What's the matter?" He asked softly, causing Prince Takumi to look up quickly.

"Nothing, why do you ask?"

"You just- you looked... Sad, just for a moment."

"I'm alright," Prince Takumi said softly, smiling even though the light of didn’t reach his eyes as brightly as before. That alone was disheartening.

"Well um," Leo cleared his throat, "I like soups and stews. To get to the point, they are dishes involving meat and vegetables in a seasoned broth. In other words, it’s close to your- miso soup," he said slowly, hoping Prince Takumi didn’t think he was bringing his Hoshidan dish down to Nohrian level. He knew the other prince detested anything Nohrian in nature after all.

"Wait, what?" Prince Takumi gasped, blinking at Leo in surprise.

"W-well, what kind of books do you like?" Leo changed the topic quickly to avoid dwelling one just one similarity they had in a world of differences. They both liked soups. There was more to a person than just the food they enjoyed.

"Books, huh," Prince Takumi said slowly, "I read plenty of books in general, but I’m particular to philosophy. The philosophers of old present theories that people today can’t even begin to think about. So I find them very fascinating."

"What in the world," Leo grumbled, "The same answer _again_?" He never thought there was someone out there who also enjoyed his fascination with philosophy. He wondered if Prince Takumi spent long hours in the library in his own castle as Leo did. He wondered what the Hoshidan library was even like. The library in Castle Krakenburg was dark and warm, illuminated only by candles that cast a golden glow on the shelves and shelves of books there to read. He had spent his childhood in that library, hidden away from the violence outside the walls.

He had been in the library when his mother had been killed by another concubine. Xander had come to tell him what had happened and had left the library a little while after that to tend to the fact that blood was still being shed in their halls. He had cried silent tears into the book he had been reading then, his tears blurring the ink, his only comfort being the fact that his own heart was still beating.

He had never loved his mother. She had never loved him in return. He was just a bargaining chip, something to be used to gain favor with Father. There was no love between them, but she had been his mother, the woman who had brought him into this world, and without her he was a little bit more alone.

Even Father was gone now.

"So what about your favorite game? What are your hobbies?" Prince Takumi’s voice broke him from his dismal thoughts and he looked up to meet the other boy’s eyes. Prince Takumi’s eyes were brighter then before, alive with curiosity and questioning, a small, if not shy, smile on his lips.

"I like chess," Leo stated, and when Prince Takumi only continued to look puzzled he explained, "It's a war game played with pieces on a board."

"That's-!" Prince Takumi gasped, "That's what we call shogi!" Leo felt himself take a sharp increase of breath at the excitement that surged into Prince Takumi’s voice then. His heart pounded quicker for a short moment, filling with warmth at just seeing the elation on Prince Takumi’s face.

"Do you like this game, shogi, Prince Takumi?" Leo asked almost hesitantly.

"Whether I like it or not, I’m the best at it among the people I know," Prince Takumi said, a hint of pride coming to his voice. Leo liked the sound of the pride in his voice. It reminding him of his own pride, strong and unmuted. If he was ever meek, he would only be walked over, ridiculed by his Father in the past, looked down upon by his older siblings, though they would never vocalize that scorn of course, “I can’t believe we’re this much alike!" Prince Takumi smiled then, ducking his head a bit, but Leo caught the starting of pink on his cheeks, "I guess it wasn’t right to distrust each other without even having a conversation."

"What a coincidence… I just happened to be thinking the same thing," Leo smiled, a gentle smile rather than a taunting smirk. Prin- _Takumi_ deserved a real smile, "Shall we continue to compare tastes for a little while?"

"Y-yeah," Takumi consented, a cute stutter to his voice, "There might actually be a lot of places where we can understand each other," he mumbled and Leo laughed then, brighter and louder than he had laughed in a long time. On impulse, he reached out settling a warm hand on Takumi’s shoulder. The other boy was so warm, firm and solid beneath his hand. The last he had seen Takumi, truly seen him in person, he had been pale and cold, on the brink of death. It just solidified in his mind that this wasn’t real. This wasn’t real because Takumi was fading in real life, perhaps already gone.

He pulled his hand away from Takumi’s shoulder and smiled at him, “Perhaps you could give me your recipe for that soup you mentioned?” he shrugged, “I could see if the cooks in Nohr could find those ingredients… I- I’d like to try it honestly.”

“Really?” Takumi smiled again then, “O-of course! Okay so first-”

He woke with the sound of Takumi’s voice still in his ears, listing off the ingredients for the soup he had never heard of. How could he dream of things he had never heard of? Miso soup? Shogi? He couldn’t fathom where those things had come from, but before he could contemplate more he was sitting up, grabbing desperately for a pen and some paper. He found only a pen and a book, no paper in sight, so he opened it to the back cover and started hurriedly scrawling down the recipe before it could leave his thoughts. His writing was messy and smeared, ink staining his fingers, but he could read it and he had it down so he wouldn’t forget.

He felt his heart pounding lightly with glad anticipation. The cooks would probably think he was crazy for wanting Hoshidan ingredients, but he was a prince. They couldn’t argue with his demands.

He headed to the kitchens before lunch, handing the cooks there the list and telling them he would take the ingredients at their earliest convenience. There was no need to rush really, but he did want to see Takumi’s reaction when he told him what he thought of the dish.

Leo stopped using the tonic to sleep when he fell asleep in the library and dreamed of Takumi all on his own. He let himself believe that his dreams were real without questioning it like he questioned everything. His dreams were special, and he held them closer and closer to his heart every time he closed his eyes to sleep.

Eventually the kitchens got the ingredients he requested and he thanked them. When the cooks had gone home for the night, he spent several hours getting the recipe for the soup just right, or hopefully right. He wondered how Takumi made it. He was doing his best; he didn’t cook often after all, but this was important to him so he was dedicated.

The soup was nothing like he had ever tasted. He had never eaten tofu for one, and he had never tasted something that was salty one moment only to have it fade into sweetness. It was addicting.

It reminded him of Takumi. They had started off so poorly but now he believed them to be friends without even questioning or doubting himself. They were friends. He liked being friends with Takumi, even if the other boy was just something his mind made up to ease his conscience. He could swear it was real though. Takumi felt real. His smiles and laughs were all so real. How could his mind invent a laugh that was so unique without even hearing it first? It made no sense to him, but in a way he supposed he didn’t need it to make sense.

“Have you heard from Prince Ryoma lately?” he asked Corrin one afternoon when they were eating lunch together.

“Yes, he sent me a letter a few days ago,” Corrin nodded, “I’ve yet to respond. It’s just so- bleak. I can tell even through his writing that he is sad.”

“About… Ta- _Prince_ Takumi?” Leo said, covering when he nearly said the other prince’s name so informally.

“Mhm,” Corrin hummed, “According to Ryoma he- he hasn’t _moved on_ yet. Somehow he’s still persisting, but Ryoma doesn’t want anyone to get their hopes up. He said he told Hinoka and Sakura to not visit the room anymore, that it just made them more upset.”

So Takumi was still alive then. His soul hadn’t perished yet.

“Perhaps there’s hope then,” Leo shrugged, trying to appear nonchalant.

“Maybe,” Corrin sighed, “I just wish- I wish I could be there. I wish there hadn’t been a need to choose sides. That we could have all worked together, ended the war, and then maybe Takumi wouldn’t- maybe everyone could have gotten along. You and Takumi are-”

“I know, I know,” Leo rolled his eyes, “We’re _very_ much alike. You’ve said that enough times.”

“It’s just too bad you will never get the chance to believe me,” Corrin said softly before she stood, “I promised to play with Elise after lunch. She’s probably waiting for me.” With that, she left Leo alone at the table with his thoughts, and his thoughts were only about Takumi.

He was still alive.

Would his dreams stop when Takumi eventually died? He didn’t want them to stop. He was sleeping soundly and regularly for the first time in years because he looked forward to seeing Takumi every night. It had been nearly three weeks of seeing him in his dreams and Leo wished it could be that way forever.

If his dreams stopped, he didn’t know what he would do. They had spoken about things Leo had only ever kept pent up inside: his failure to ever be as good as Xander, his relationship with Father, the fact that he was so hard to like apparently, so hard to love. Takumi shared in most of his pain. Apparently, Prince Ryoma was the spitting image of King Sumeragi. He even possessed his level of skill, and Takumi explained to him how inferior he felt all the time, constantly living in that shadow.

They related more and more with each passing day and Leo craved it. He looked forward to sleeping every night only because Takumi would be there waiting for him.

"Thank you so much for sharing your miso soup recipe with me," Leo smiled several days later, "It truly was the best. The sweetness and saltiness- and that hint of flavor from the meat and seafood was absolutely appetizing!”

"If you were fond of it, that’s more than I could ask for," Takumi smiled up at him, "That’s my favorite preparation of miso soup, but so many make it differently. Next time, you should tell me your favorite way to make the- the stew you enjoy," he said, "I cannot wait to try it."

"Yes, of course," Leo agreed easily, a smile on his own face. Truthfully, he was elated that Takumi would wish to try something Nohrian, and only because he had suggested it. It made his heart beat a little faster and his smile wider, "At any rate, it seems we can have an honest conversation now, hm? All the insults we spat at each other seem to be a lie," he laughed, suddenly feeling a bit sheepish at their earlier conversations. He supposed to had been quite rude as well, but Takumi’s forgiveness was obvious on his face, and he hoped his own apology was clear too.

"You’re right. We thought we would never see eye-to-eye, but friendship is a mysterious thing," Takumi sighed. He stopped walking then, forcing Leo to stop at his side before he turned to him, "But, Leo... I- I think it would be folly to let our relationship end at ordinary friendship.” His voice was soft, almost a whisper, and shy too. Leo blinked at him in surprise, finding that anything he wanted to say was caught in his throat. Did Takumi want to- to be lovers rather than friends? Or did he mean that he wanted to have their bond connect their kingdoms? It was confusing, and Leo found he would prefer the first thing he thought, but he couldn’t say that out loud. He didn’t want to ruin anything.

"What a coincidence," Leo hummed, smiling at the other prince, "I was just about to say the same. I think we should let our bond strengthen the bonds between our countries of Hoshido and Nohr." Hopefully that would be the answer Takumi was looking for. He kept his eyes trained on the other boy’s face, looking for any sign of agreement or disappointment. Takumi smiled then, though his eyes didn’t quite reflect the expression all the way.

"As fellow princes of Nohr and Hoshido," Takumi said, "We’ll be a living example that our countries can get along. Once peace comes, I think I’d like to show that to our people."

"Well, if not all goes well, just give me a call. I’ll come running with a delicious soup recipe," Leo laughed, teasing the other prince gently just so he could see Takumi smile wider.  Maybe he was completely smitten with the other boy, but he couldn’t say anything just then. It had to be right. Takumi laughed loudly at his teasing and Leo committed the image to memory before he could stop himself. He was beautiful when he laughed, his smile wide and his eyes bright.

"I just wanted you to know. It won’t be an easy journey, but as someone who protects the people, I’d like to set the world on the right path."

"You have changed then," Leo said then before he could stop himself, "Who knew you would be so willing to accept a truce between our people." It was truly remarkable how Takumi could speak to him without anger or hatred, and how he could do the same thing.

"Things change," Takumi said softly, "I mean, I have you, right? And- and my sister is a Nohrian as well."

"She's Hoshidan too," Leo countered gently and he brought his hand up to graze Takumi's own, feeling the warmth from the other boy’s fingers against his own, "She didn't want to betray you. She never stopped being your sister." Corrin cared so deeply for her Hoshidan siblings, and for Takumi as well. It saddened Leo that the other boy couldn’t see that himself, but he could show him. He could guide him.

Takumi didn’t say anything else, but Leo could see the realization on his face when he listened to him, and he was glad he could help ease Takumi’s conscience. If only it was that easy to help his own guilt.

He woke shortly after that to a new day. Xander’s coronation was in a few days and he knew he had so much work to get done, but all he wanted to do was think about Takumi’s words.

_It would be folly to let our relationship end at ordinary friendship…_

_Ordinary friendship._

They weren’t ordinary, that was for certain, but Leo would admit that he knew nothing about romantic love or anything past ordinary companionship.

And that was why he found himself outside Camilla’s quarters later that day. If anyone would know anything about what Takumi meant, it would be Camilla. She was always so interested in his personal life anyway. He supposed this would tide her over for a while.

“How nice of you to come see me, Leo,” Camilla crooned as soon as she opened the door to him, pulling him into for a hug he couldn’t refuse, “You and Xander have been working so hard lately,” she pouted, “I feel like I rarely see either of you!”

“Sorry Camilla,” he mumbled when she finally finished squeezing him in a hug, “I just- I’m still busy. I just want to ask you something. You seemed like the best person to come to for this…”

“Oh? Do tell,” Camilla smiled then, inviting him into her quarters and gesturing to a seat.

“Well, I- I was wondering if you knew what it would mean when someone says that it would be foolish to let a relationship end at friendship.” He felt his cheeks grow red under Camilla’s scrutiny and he looked down at his lap, knowing he would only grow redder if he saw her face.

“My, my, Leo,” she cooed, “Did you find yourself a _lover_ perhaps? And _I_ didn’t notice?”

“Wh-what?” Leo choked out, whipping his gaze up to Camilla’s face, “No! I just- I just needed to know what that meant!”

“It means that whomever said those words to you is in love with you, my silly little brother,” Camilla teased, her violet eyes bright as she gazed at him, “Don’t tell me you had no idea.”

“I just wanted to be sure,” he said quickly, defensively, but Camilla didn’t take offense. She could easily see through him. She had always been able to see through him.

“Well, now you’re sure,” she hummed, crossing her legs and leaning back in her chair, “Are you going to do something about it?”

That he didn’t know. He couldn’t tell Camilla about his dreams. He couldn’t tell her he was in love with a boy who was dying. He couldn’t tell her he was in love with a Hoshidan prince.

He was in love with Takumi. He knew that now. He was in love with him and his heart ached and ached because Takumi was dying. He would never get to hold him or kiss him. He would never hold his hand or stroke his cheek, feel his long hair, fall asleep with him in his arms. He would get nothing, and maybe this was his punishment. He had tried to save the other prince and he had failed. This was fate’s way of forcing his guilt upon him.

He hated it. It wasn’t fair.

But he loved Takumi, and even if he could never say it in person, he could tell the boy in his dreams what he felt for him.

That had to be enough.

“Maybe,” he finally answered Camilla, simply because he wouldn’t give her the satisfaction, “Thank you for your help, sister. I must go. There are preparations to be made for the coronation.” He stood then and regarded Camilla with a nod. She was still giving him a knowing smile, one that made his cheeks flush, so he hurried from the room to drown himself in work for the rest of the day. He was jittery while he worked only because he was so anxious to go to sleep that night, anxious to talk to Takumi again.

He decided to go to sleep early that night, but his heart was beating so swiftly it took his hours to feel tired enough to finally close his eyes.

And when he did Takumi was there as usual. It soothed his worries to see the other prince. Everything weighing on him disappeared whenever he saw Takumi. He wished his life could be like that all the time, but it just couldn’t. Life wasn’t fair like that.

"I've been thinking about what you said," he finally spoke up, looking to Takumi nervously.

"About what?" Takumi asked, looking up at him curiously.

"About... About us," Leo murmured, "About how it would be folly to- to let this- what we have end as mere friendship. I don't think I quite understood you before."

"But you... You understand now?" Takumi’s eyes were suddenly wide, and Leo could recognize the stirrings of hope in the bright amber of his gaze.

"I do," Leo nodded and he turned on the spot, facing Takumi rather than standing beside him, "If you were trying to say what I think we were trying to say, then yes, I agree."

"You... Agree?" Takumi questioned softly, as if Leo’s words weren’t penetrating fully.

"Yes," Leo breathed, "I agree and, if you'd have me, I would- I would most like to explore what we could have together. I would like to- to try- loving you." He trailed off, feeling how his cheeks were burning, likely a bright, embarrassing red, but he didn’t look away. He wouldn’t look away from Takumi. He watched Takumi’s face carefully. The other prince looked mostly stunned at his words, but slowly he saw tears starting to gather in Takumi’s eyes, and when tears started down his cheeks, he reached forward and cupped Takumi’s cheek in his palm, thumbing the tears away from the warm skin.

"H-hey," he whispered, "Why are you crying?" Had he done something wrong? Had he ruined everything?

"I'm happy," Takumi finally breathed, his voice cracking on the words, "I am truly happy, Leo. I haven't- I haven't felt this way in- in years I don't think..."

"I want you to feel this way," Leo smiled then, the worry leaving his heart at Takumi’s words. He kept his hand still on Takumi's cheek, stroking the soft skin gently, "I want you to feel this way all the time."

"Then make me feel this way all the time," Takumi whispered, "Please. I want you to."

"I will," Leo said. He paused for a quick moment before he leaned in, angling his head before he claimed Takumi’s lips, kissing him slowly and tentatively. Takumi’s lips were soft beneath his own as he imagined they would be, but Takumi wasn’t kissing back. He wasn’t even moving.

"I can't," Takumi whispered against Leo's lips, "I can't feel you doing that. Why can't I?" Leo took in a shaky breath, sighing softly. Would fate allow this? Was he allowed to tell Takumi where they were? Was he allowed to tell Takumi what was really going on? He couldn’t let the boy he loved suffer with not knowing. He couldn’t do that to him.

"Because," he started, clearing his throat softly, "Because you're asleep, Takumi. You've been asleep for quite some time now."

"I don't- _Asleep_?" Takumi choked out, "This is- a-a dream?"

"No, this is real to an extent, but you and I are not in the same place right now physically," he said slowly, trying to figure how to phrase everything correctly, "Because you- you're asleep, and you haven't woken up since the war. I want you to wake up so I can- so I can come to you and hold you like I want. So please, wake up soon, Prince Takumi. I'm waiting for you, and I'll keep waiting." He felt a shift in the dream around them then. Suddenly everything was falling apart and he was being torn away from Takumi.

He heard Takumi call for him before he bolted upright in bed with a strangled gasp, breathing hard in the dark quiet of his room. He could only see Takumi’s horrified expression flashing in front of his eyes, scared and terrified, and suddenly he knew he had messed up. He had changed the dynamic so aggressively with the truth that it had shattered their private world. He doubted he would see Takumi again after that.

Takumi would die alone without him at his side and it hurt. His chest ached with sorrow and loss like he had never felt before. Was this what it was like to lose someone he actually cared for? It hurt and it wasn’t dulling at all.

It was still dark out but he knew sleep would evade him for the time it took for morning to come so he got up from bed. The coronation was only three days away and there was still too much work to be done.

Camilla gave him a coy, questioning look over breakfast but he ignored her. He didn’t go to lunch either, spending hours with Xander’s advisers to help with the last minute details for the event.

He couldn’t sleep that night either and his heart still ached, longing for his dreams to return.

At breakfast the next morning, he felt a shift in the pain in his chest, and suddenly it consumed his entire body, burning and searing as the pain flowed through him. He heard his siblings calling to him and he registered his body hitting the floor, but he could barely move and he couldn’t speak. He was gasping for air, but his entire chest felt tight and he could barely feel the breaths entering his lungs. Xander was looking over him, shouting his name, but all he could think of was Takumi.

Takumi was dying, wasn’t he…

This pain was Takumi’s pain. They were connected some how, he realized that now, it was obvious. He should have thought of it sooner, but he was foolish, too trapped in the world of his dreams with Takumi. They were connected and he could feel Takumi’s pain, and this pain was Takumi’s final pain.

He deserved it. He deserved to feel every bit of it because he had done this to the other prince. He had destroyed whatever was left of him. He hadn’t saved him.

He had killed him.

This was only fair that it would hurt him too.

“Leo! Leo, can you hear me? What’s happening? Leo!” Xander’s voice was suddenly loud in his ears, followed by a shrill ringing. He couldn’t stop his eyes from closing when blackness started to creep into the edges of his vision. With his eyes closed and his mind turned away from reality, it was only black. There was no Hoshidan prince there to see him.

There was nothing.

There would always be nothing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I still don't know how long this fic will be Leo has lots to do before he even goes to see the bae and I have no plan owo; 
> 
> Now that this chapter is officially done, I probably won't update for like a week because I have exams Tuesday, Wednesday, and Saturday (cries) but I type fast so I'll probably go against this statement again oops
> 
> Thank you for reading and for all the superb comments left on the first chapter!!! They literally make writing worthwhile and I kinda internally scream when I see them in my email ;;;u;;;
> 
> See ya next time <3


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM BACK. Hello everyone I am done with exams (I just have two gross essays to write) but I had to get this done first because leokumi is important.
> 
> Idk why Leo gets me writing so much but this chapter is ALSO almost 7k words wow look at me go
> 
> I hope you enjoy!!! <333

It hurt to wake up.

Slowly, the darkness receded from Leo’s mind and the pain flowed steadily through his body, stemming from the center of his chest as his eyes opened. He was laying in his bed, surrounded by blankets. The room was mostly dark, illuminated lightly by the flickering flames in the fireplace. He groaned softly, forcing himself to sit up in bed. A damp cloth fell into his lap from his forehead when he did and he reached for it slowly, his mind still confused and lost as to what had happened.

“Milord, you’re awake.” He looked up quickly to see Niles standing at the edge of the bed, a concerned frown on his face, which was quite a different expression from his typical smirk, “I will fetch Lord Xander immediately, milord. He’ll want to see you.”

“Niles, wait-” he tried, but his retainer was already leaving the room before he could bombard him with questions. What had happened? How long had he been out? Why was he in such pain?

“Leo!” The door slammed open and the sound of it made him wince, his ears suddenly ringing sharply as Xander rushed to his side, “Brother, I am relieved you’re awake.” He smiled then in the gentle way he usually smiled at Elise or Corrin, “How are you feeling, Leo?”

“I- What happened? How long was I-”

“Easy,” Xander soothed, “You should lay back. You still look flushed,” he frowned, his fingers grazing Leo’s cheek gently, “Please, brother.” He gestured to the bed and Leo sighed, knowing he hated the way Xander’s voice was so filled with worry. He relented, shakily laying back against the pillows. That seemed to soothe Xander a bit and some of the worry knitted into his eyebrows evened out, “You’ve been unconscious since breakfast yesterday,” he explained softly, “It’s nearly daybreak now.”

“I wasted an entire day?” Leo asked in shock, moving to try and sit up again only for Xander to press a hand to his chest, forcing him back down in the bed.

“Your priorities are not where they should be, Leo,” he said sternly, “I know you haven’t been sleeping well. You have been working far too hard,” he frowned, “At first, Camilla though you had been poisoned when you collapsed, but there was no detectable agent in anything on the table. I suppose, in a way, you poisoned yourself with all the work you have been doing. You need to take better care of yourself, brother.”

“I’m fine,” Leo sighed in aggravation.

“You’re not,” Xander said quickly, “And in a way, that is my fault. I have been relying too heavily on you these past few weeks. I know you have been struggling with yourself too after what occurred at the end of the war. I should have given you time to collect yourself before having such urgent need of you.”

“If you think I’m lamenting Father’s death, you’re wrong, Xander,” Leo huffed, looking away from Xander’s worried gaze.

“No, I don’t think you’re blaming yourself for that. I think you’re fretting over the Hoshidan Prince, Prince Takumi.”

“Wh-what?” Leo gasped, looking back at Xander’s face, “Why would you-”

Suddenly it hit him again and he remembered in the feverish haze of exhaustion that hung over his thoughts. He had ruined his own dreams with Takumi, the only place he had felt calm and loved, the only place he had found true companionship. He had been selfish and ruined it. He had felt such excruciating pain in his chest because…

Because of Takumi. It had to be because of him.

Because he was dying.

Likely already dead.

His chest suddenly ached hard again with sorrow and he gasped, his fingers digging into his torso as he squeezed his eyes shut.

“Leo!” Xander’s voice was higher in volume and so _worried_ again. He hated it. He hated being a burden like this, especially to Nohr’s soon-to-be king when the kingdom was in such disarray.

“I’m fine,” he gritted out, “I am _fine_.” He forced his eyes back open and regarded Xander there, trying to stay composed despite the pain in his body, “Why would you think that a _Hoshidan_ Prince would be in my thoughts?” He got the words out without his voice quivering too much, but he doubted it was enough to convince Xander in full.

“Corrin told me that you have been asking about Prince Takumi lately,” Xander said. Leo bit down on the inside of his cheek when Takumi’s name was brought up again so he wouldn’t visibly wince at the pang of physical hurt that erupted at just hearing Takumi’s name, “You should not feel guilty for your actions against him. He was a Hoshidan Prince, but in that moment he was a danger. It is truly a shame that the Hoshidan royal family is a member less after the war, but it is not your fault.”

“I _know_ that,” Leo huffed, rolling his eyes to feign nonchalance, “I don’t know where you came up with this.” Xander watched his for a long moment with doubt in his eyes before he sighed and gave a small nod.

“Alright, if you insist. Perhaps I was reading into the situation far too closely,” he murmured, his eyes holding a far away look, still narrowed in thought, “But nevertheless, you are to stay here, Leo,” he said firmly, his frown deepening, “You are still feverish, and you’re clearly exhausted.”

“What? You can’t be serious,” Leo forced out, pushing himself up in the bed again despite the warning of Xander’s hand on his shoulder, “There is too much work to be done before the coronation. We don’t have time for me to lay around in bed. Your coronation is _tomorrow_ and-”

“And I will push it back a few days if I have to,” Xander said firmly, taking advantage of the trembling in his arms to push him back down into the bed, arranging the blankets up to his shoulders, “Don’t worry yourself, Leo. Everything will work out. For now, I want you to stay in bed until you’re well again. That’s an order… From your king.” A bit of humor came into his voice and he smiled then. Leo rolled his eyes, refusing to laugh at Xander’s attempt to lighten the mood in the room.

“You’re not king yet,” he mumbled defiantly, averting his gaze from Xander’s face.

“Maybe not, but I’m still your older brother and I care about you very much. I want you to be okay. I want you to be well,” Xander said easily as he reached forward and pushed Leo’s bangs away from his forehead, placing the cool cloth back on his heated skin, “I’m sure Niles or Odin will get you anything you require. I’ll be back to check on you later.”

“You don’t have to-”

“Yes, I do,” Xander’s voice was stern as he stood from where he had been sitting on the edge of Leo’s bed, “Get some rest, little brother.” He left before Leo could even try and protest again. Honestly, laying around in bed all day was such a nuisance even if he could feel how his skin was too hot but he was still too cold under the blankets. When he had been a child, he had gotten sick rarely, but when he did he had despised it. Camilla would fuss over him endlessly, but he felt useless, like a complete burden.

If he wasn’t doing something, he was wasting space. That was what he had always believed.

It was what his Father had wanted him to believe.

Maybe the lesson didn’t settle into Xander or Camilla as deeply as it did him, but even with Father gone, he still felt the annoying sensation of wastefulness deep in his bones.  

He huffed out a sigh and forced his eyes closed, knowing Xander would only bother him more if he refused to rest.

In the solace of his own thoughts he could only think of Takumi.

_Takumi._

Takumi wasn’t there anymore. He wouldn’t be coming back to his dreams, and that made the idea of sleep all that more unappealing. He knew as soon as he was well again he would have to go to the library for as long as it took to decipher what exactly he had done to himself and the Hoshidan Prince when he had used that spell.

Everything was real again. He wasn’t caught in the fog of infatuation within his own dreams. He was cognizant now and he knew for a fact that he had done something very wrong. He had grown to love the boy he had seen in his dreams only to shatter them and Takumi’s life along with it.

Just thinking it wasn’t enough. His head was too numbed by his constant thoughts to really understand what was happening.

“Takumi is… gone,” he whispered in the quiet dark of his room, “He’s not coming back.” He lay still and let his own words sink back into his ears. As he let himself hear them spoken out loud, in that moment it became real.

Takumi was _gone_.

Exhaustion took ahold of him then and he fell asleep with tears burning in his eyes, knowing he wouldn’t see anyone when his mind went black.

His sleep was fitful and uncomfortable from the heat of his fever, but eventually the heat in his body broke, letting him sleep more soundly. He was awake and groggy when Xander came quietly back into his quarters some time later as he had promised he would. From where he lay curled in the blankets, the sheets twisted around his legs, he watched his brother advance into the room, hesitantly at first when he thought he was sleeping, but then more swiftly when Xander caught his eyes. He hoped Xander could only see tiredness reflected in his eyes and not the utter heartbreak he could feel in every fiber of his being. Xander didn’t need to know that detail. That was his own private hell.

“Are you feeling any better, Leo?” Xander asked, coming closer to lay the palm of his hand gently against his forehead, smiling a bit after a moment, “You don’t feel too warm anymore. That’s good.”

“I was fine before,” he said softly, but Xander would be able to tell that his normal bite wasn’t in the words. His older brother only smiled, his fingers idly brushing through stray strands of his hair before they pulled away and his hand rested against the blankets.

“At any case, I want you to continue to rest for the remainder of today,” he said firmly, “We will be commencing with the coronation tomorrow and I simply could not become King of Nohr without you there, Leo.” His voice was tender, but Leo couldn’t feel any of that tenderness penetrating his body. He was physically warm under the blankets, comfortably so, but his heart was cold and lonely, filled with heartache and longing.

“Very well,” he finally murmured after realizing Xander was waiting for a response. Surprise flashed through his brother’s eyes at his quiet words, but he didn’t mention it, simply calming his expression and smiling once more.

“I’ll have the maids bring you in something to eat for when you’re hungry,” he offered, standing from the bed, “And I’m sure Elise will want to see you later, if you’re not too tired.”

He was too tired. He was always too tired, but that had been the same for his entire life. He constantly hid his exhaustion well, shrouded it in firm words and disguised it with easy smirks. Now though, he found himself unable to even try in front of Xander. There was too much hurt to disguise, so much that he couldn’t fathom a way to shove it all away. He was tired, but when he fell asleep there would be nothing there.

What was even the point then? Why had the last few weeks in his dreams even happened? Fate truly did despise his existence if the intention was to offer him love and then crush his heart.

No.

No, he did that all on his own.

Xander left the room quietly and he hardly noticed. When the maids brought him a tray of food, he ate the soup there and ignored everything else, barely even tasting it as it passed over his tongue before he fell back asleep. If Elise came to see him, her bright eyes and wide smile went unseen.

When he woke in the morning, he felt more rested than the day before, but his body still sent painful twinges through him when he moved, the pain stemming from the constant ache in his heart. He had never read heartache to be physical pain. It was supposed to be psychological, something imagined to be real rather than an actual sensation.

He knew he had to figure out what exactly was going on with his body and soon before he started wondering if he himself was dying.

Dying just like Takumi.

That would have to wait until the next day. This day was already dedicated, and for a moment Leo felt a brief spark of excitement in his chest as he dressed himself for the coronation ceremony. This was the day he had been putting so much hard work into since the war ended. It would be the beginning of a new era in Nohr, but he could barely force himself to smile as he looked at himself in the mirror.

He was supposed to feel different, but his emotions were frayed, completely burnt up by fierce love and overwhelming loss.

While the day of Xander’s coronation was as bleak as any other day in Nohr weather-wise, Leo noticed that there was a certain glow about the people that came to the castle to attend the ceremony. It took a while for him to actually decipher that the identity of the aura that enveloped the entirely of castle Krakenburg was hope.

Hope for a new future, a better future with Xander as their king.

Hope that wounds would close, bloodshed would cease, and people could be happy again.

Hope to leave the memories of war in the past.

Leo figured it would be best for him to do the same thing. The wounds the war left on his own soul had yet to close up and heal over into scars, and he wondered if they ever would. There had been so much loss, so many decisions he had to make for the sake of Corrin, for the sake of his family, and for the glory of Nohr. Perhaps the pain would lessen, but never fade.  He knew he could live a life in pain such as that, but he knew he couldn’t live with the agony he could feel every time he moved or every time he even thought about Takumi.

As expected, Prince Ryoma had sent his retainers and one of Hoshido’s lead advisers, a bespectacled man named Yukimura, to Nohr in his place for Xander’s coronation. They looked out of place surrounded by mostly Nohrian nobles and dignitaries, but Xander welcomed them nonetheless, thanking them profusely for taking the time to even travel for the ceremony. Xander was ever the diplomat, strong and charismatic, and he was perfect to lead Nohr now that Father had gone.

Idly during the ceremony, he briefly wondered what it would be like if he had to run the kingdom. Most of Xander’s other advisers disliked him because he had been arrogant to them as a child, constantly flaunting his intelligence because it was all he had in the world to stand out against his other brothers and sisters. He figured they would have forgotten his past nature eventually, but he could still hear the difference in their voices when they spoke to Xander, and he knew they went behind his back to consult Xander directly on things of which he wouldn’t agree.

Being king wasn’t his destiny though. It was always Xander’s birthright and burden to bear, and he looked so _right_ when Father’s crown was situated in his golden curls, his armored shoulders draped in a similar cape to that of what Father used to wear. There were similarities in appearance, but Xander would never be anything like Father, and as he clapped softly for his brother as he rose from his bowed position, crown perched high atop his head, he felt relief.

Relief in that his family was alive; relief that it was Xander who would be king; relief that the war was over and the pain was behind them as a whole.

His pain was still in front of him, or rather inside him, but the collective pain he had felt and shared with Xander and their sisters would be no more. Nohr would be a different place, a reformed kingdom. There was a light in the darkness and Xander was capable of guiding Nohr into that light.

There was no way he could ever do the same.

The light he had hoped for, the future he had wanted to create, was contained in the corpse of a Hoshidan Prince whom he had left pale and cold and dying in a foreign land. He had hoped too much then, or rather he had put too much faith in himself. It would be better to put his faith and trust behind Xander. There was nothing he could do to change the fate of their nation or the fate of even one life for that matter.

Xander made a speech from where he stood, crowned as Nohr’s king, his voice strong and even as he spoke about the needlessness of the war, the folly that was the fighting and the bloodshed, and the expectations for a bright future. Leo briefly wondered if he had been rehearsing the words for a while, but he figured Xander had probably been teaching himself the speech for years, a constant hope to end the war, to bring peace. He doubted Xander imagined killing Father would be part of that plan, but sacrifice had to be made; he knew that better than anyone.

He figured most of his life from then on would be sacrifices. As Xander’s younger brother, he would always stand in his shadow, supporting any political positions he took, absorbing the blunt of the people’s disagreement should any arise, all while receiving none of the glory.

That was his destiny. It was finite and unchangeable.

How Takumi had steered his mind away from something that he he’d always known to be permanent to focus on a love that was so ephemeral was beyond his thinking.

Maybe because it wasn’t supposed to be so short-lived.

Maybe because they were supposed to be forever.

He shook the thoughts away swiftly as Xander finished his speech. He knew he couldn’t be filling his mind with thoughts of Takumi, and especially not with thoughts as naïve as those that dealt with true love, when representatives from Hoshido were in the midst.

By sundown he was tired, too tired to continue talking to nobles and dignitaries about Xander’s plans for Nohr. He didn’t know everything about what his brother wanted for the kingdom, and even if he did he wouldn’t be sharing it so easily with nobles he scarcely knew. The war was over and Father was gone, but there were people who had supported his regime, people like Hans and Iago. Xander had mostly gotten rid of the advisers that were Father’s biggest supporters, but the war had been profitable for some people as sick as that was.

There was no chance of another war – Xander would never allow it – but there was always the chance of small rebellions, disturbances in the peace they had worked so tirelessly to create. The coming months in Nohr would be tense and hectic, exhausting for everyone aside from Elise. He loved that Elise was happy. Her light gave the rest of them reason to smile even if Nohr’s lands were mostly infertile and their people were starving in the streets.

“Big brother!” It was as if Elise had known he was thinking about her and suddenly she was at his side, grasping his hand tightly in her own, “Leo! Will you come dance with me? Xander is too busy,” she pouted, “Please? _Please_ , Leo?”

“Alright, alright,” he huffed, smiling down at her, “I’ll dance with you. You got that new dress after all. You should get to show it off, right?”

“Right!” Elise said loudly, giving him a beaming smile, and the light of it felt like it could actually penetrate the darkness around his heart, “Come on!” She all but dragged him to where people were dancing to the quiet music that filled the room, “I’m been practicing lots with Camilla!” she smiled smugly, “She says I’m getting way better.”

“I don’t doubt that you are,” Leo smiled softly, taking her by the hand and holding her lightly around the waist, letting Elise initiate the movement. They dance slowly and Elise watched their feet nearly the entire time before Leo took more of the control, guiding Elise gently.

“Hey, big brother?” Elise said softly after a few minutes, “I was- really worried when you got sick the other day,” she frowned as she looked up at him, her violet eyes darkened and her eyebrows turned up in sorrow, “You promised me, remember? You promised me you would never leave like- like Princess Sakura’s big brother…”

“Elise,” Leo whispered, slightly shocked by her sudden change in demeanor, “Elise, I- I was just tired, alright?” he said softly, “I’ve been working far too much and I was really tired, but I’m alright now, aren’t I?”

“Maybe,” Elise’s voice was quieter than usual, her lips still not smiling as before.

“Maybe? What does that mean exactly?” he hummed, trying to tease her, but it brought none of the usual playfully annoyed light to her eyes.

“You’re different now,” Elise whispered, “Everything is different now that Father is gone. Everyone is different because Xander is king, but you- you’re the _most_ different, Leo!”

“Elise, I-”

“You _promised_ , Leo,” Elise said quickly before he could try and soothe her with whatever excuses would come to mind first, “You promised you wouldn’t go away, and maybe you’re still _here_ but you’re not _you_ ,” she raised her gaze to his face again and he could see how her eyes were teary, “Please, big brother… I just want things to be like before. So you have to make a me a new promise, okay?” She smiled up at him then, soft and sweet, an expression that eased some of the pain in his chest, “You have to promise me that you’ll always be happy, or try your hardest to be! Because if you’re happy, then you’re the old Leo again, the one I love!” She smiled brightly again, her eyes closing happily into the expression as he stood stunned at her proclamation.

The song ended and Elise reached forward, wrapping her arms around him in a tight hug that he slowly returned, stroking through the soft blond curls of her hair.

“Do you promise me?” she asked softly against his chest, peaking up at him with hope in her eyes.

“Of course,” Leo smiled then, “I promise, Elise. I just need some time, but I promise you I’m still here, and I’ll be me again soon, and then everything will be good again.”

“Yay! That’s so great!” Elise cheered, giggling as she squeezed him once more before letting go of him from her embrace, “I love you so much, big brother!” She beamed at him once more before she dipped into a playful curtsy and ran off to where Camilla was talking with Corrin, her laughter trailing behind her.

He watched her go with a bemused smile he hadn’t realized was on his lips. Slowly, he allowed his lips to melt back into a neutral frown as he walked quietly away from the couples would were starting to dance again with the sounds of a new song beginning.

Even Elise had noticed that he wasn’t the same then. He felt like an outlier in his own family, ostracized by his own guilt and his own secrets. They hadn’t forced him away. He had pulled himself away, hidden away in his worries and dreams. Even his retainers had kept their distance from him. Odin hadn’t regarded him with his usual flair in a while, and Niles had barely had the nerve to make any suggestive comments to him on his behaviors.

He didn’t know how everything had changed so quickly all caused by the catalyst that was his own offer to save Takumi.

Or try to save him.

Maybe that was what he was subconsciously waiting for, he thought as he walked slowly away from the celebration. Maybe he was waiting for Corrin to blame him, to yell and curse at him for killing her brother. Perhaps he was waiting for Hoshido to realize that he was to blame and retaliate. The fact that three Hoshidans were in their midst only made him more nervous. He hadn’t dared meet their eyes once. Prince Ryoma’s retainers were slightly terrifying anyway.

Lost in his thoughts, he found himself at the doors of the library a bit later, and he pushed them open with a soft sigh leaving his lips. He had barely spent much time in the library lately. Either he had been too busy with Xander or too enamored with his dreams to enjoy the calm solace of the room. After the war, he had tucked Brynhildr away in a hidden compartment in the stone that made up the south wall of the place. He hadn’t needed the tome since the fighting stopped just as Xander hadn’t need his sword.

As he took the tome back into his hands after weeks of disuse, he felt the strength of it surge through him before prickling pain started in his right hand, searing up his arm into his chest. He gasped, dropping the tome to the ground as he shakily gripped his wrist with his other hand, squeezing his eyes shut to force the pain away.

It was the same feeling that he had experienced when he had hit Takumi with that spell, the same painful numbness that had flowed and the ripping pain in his center.

What exactly had he done to himself? What had he done to the both of them?

He managed to curl his hand into a fist despite the pain, flexing his fingers as he tried to ward off the sensation. Eventually, he shakily picked Brynhildr up off the ground with his left hand, keeping his right arm held tight against his chest as he set the book down on a table, reaching to light a lamp in the dimness of the room. The tome had been there for him since he was a child. He had discovered it in the back of the library where most of the books were covered in cobwebs, their pages ruined by years of neglect and terrible condition. He had felt it whispering to him among the dark shelves, and the moment he grasped it for the first time he knew he would be okay despite all the death and bloodshed going on around him

While his brothers, sisters, and their mothers killed and slaughtered each other, he stayed quiet with Brynhildr to protect him, and once Father had learned of his ability to use the tome, he had become nearly on the same level of Xander, worthy to be a prince of Nohr. He became immune then. His own mother was already dead and he was on his own, but he was safe, protected by Xander and Camilla and their Father who had effectively chosen him for his power.

Now though, now Brynhildr wouldn’t let him even feel the magic flowing through it’s pages without reminding him painfully of what he had done, the death he had caused and the subsequent pain.

Slowly, he opened the book, flipping carefully to the page containing the spell he had used on the final day of the war. It seemed so long ago, like years had passed rather than a month. Maybe he just felt older, less alive, like there was less for which to keep on living.

He traced the spell inscribed on the page with careful fingers, feeling small shocks of magic traveling through his fingers as he touched the paper with reverence. There was still nothing in the spell he could decipher for himself, nothing he could even comprehend, but he had to figure out what he had done exactly. If he was dying from the effects of whatever spell he had used, he would like to know, and preferably soon.

If he died, he could see Takumi again.

No. No he couldn’t allow himself to even start thinking that way. There was too much to live for; his sisters and brother, the bright future of Nohr.

There was no love to live for; that was the only drawback, but things could get better. He could try and live with heartache. He would make it work.

There were several shelves of books on translation of more languages than Leo had ever heard spoken or seen written so he started collected the ones that seemed the most promising in helping him decipher whatever was written in Brynhildr’s pages. Time always got away from him in the library when he started reading and the same happened then. He only came out of his trance when he heard the door to the library creaking open.

“Leo?” Xander’s voice reached him, echoing along the shelves in the dim light of the room, “Leo, I know you’re in here.”

“Back here,” he called out, closing the book he was reading with a huff of annoyance. Its pages had held no relevance to him as was the case with the many others he had searched through that night.

“There you are,” Xander smiled when he came into view. There was tiredness etched into his face, highlighted by the low, flickering light of the candles on the table Leo had stacked with books, “How did I know I would find you here?”

“Is the party over?” Leo asked out, standing from his seat to stretch his arms over his head.

“For the most part,” Xander breathed out a heavy sigh, “The maids will be dealing with the clean up probably through the night. Did you not enjoy yourself?”

“It was fine,” he said in return, giving a half shrug with one shoulder before he turned away from Xander to stack up the books he figured would be the most promising in his search for answers, “I was just- tired.”

“Tired? So tired that you retreated to read in the dismal light of the- the world languages section of the library?” Xander asked out. There was questioning in his voice, but also teasing because he knew of Leo’s habits.

“Perhaps an evening spent entertaining nobles and dignitaries got me feeling scholarly, brother,” Leo smirked, gathering the stack of books up close to his chest, keeping Brynhildr tucked under his arm, “I am rather tired though.”

“I came to tell you that I wished for you to go rest,” Xander said with a smile, “I don’t want you to ever be so exhausted that you make yourself sick ever again, Leo,” his smile fell as his voice turned stern, “You’re very important to me and I will not have you falling ill again. I couldn’t bear it if our family became anymore fractured than it was with the loss of Father.”

“I’m not _dying_ , Xander,” Leo huffed with exasperation, “But I promise you, I will do my best to heed your wishes.” Xander seemed satisfied with that and he took half of the stack of books from Leo’s arms before he could protest, walking with him in comfortable silence back to his quarters. They bid each other good night, and Leo could feel Xander’s gaze on his back as he slipped into his quarters and shut the door behind him.

It had been an overly long day, an exhausting day, and the constant ache under his skin made him even more tired than usual. He stripped free of his constricting formal clothes, draping them over a chair for the maids to fetch in the morning before he changed into his night clothes, falling into the sheets. For the first time in a long while, he welcomed sleep with no expectations of seeing Takumi, but there was still hope quivering weakly in his heart that the other boy would be there.

That hope became duller each time he closed his eyes to only greet blackness.

Come morning, the castle was back as it was the day before the coronation. Everything had been cleaned up and the guests had all returned home, the Hoshidans included. Breakfast that morning was almost normal. Leo kept feeling Xander’s eyes on his face as he quietly ate while reading through pages of a text on language, trying to find the script that would let him translate the spell in Brynhildr.

The dynamic was upset when a courier came in carrying a letter for Corrin from Hoshido.

“From Ryoma?” Corrin’s voice tore his attention away from his book and he looked up, swallowing hard around the lump that he suddenly felt had formed in his throat. He knew what the letter would say. It had to be Prince Ryoma telling Corrin that her brother had finally gone. He didn’t want to watch when Corrin read the letter, but he figured he owed it to her.

He had killed a member of her birth family and he would absorb the hatred and anger that would come with her realization.

Corrin unfolded the letter slowly and Leo recognized then that their other siblings were watching Corrin as well, the sound of utensils against plates silent as she read the words written there.

“O-oh Gods,” Corrin finally whispered, her hand moving to press against her mouth as her eyes filled with the tears Leo knew would be coming.

“What is it, dear?” Camilla asked softly, reaching out to place a hand on Corrin’s shoulder, “Is something the matter?”

“It’s Takumi… H-he’s-”

_Dead._

_He’s dead._

_Say it, sister._

_Say it._

“H-he- he _woke up_ ,” she sobbed, dropping the paper to the table and pressing her face into her hands, “H-he’s _aliv_ e! He’s not- he a-actually woke up!”

“Ohh, there, there, dear,” Camilla soothed, a smile on her lips as she reached to console Corrin as she always did, “This is a good thing, yes? No need for tears now.”

Leo couldn’t move.

He couldn’t breathe.

His heart was beating so fast he feared it may just stop all together.

Takumi was…

No. _No_ it had to be a lie. It couldn’t be true because Takumi was gone. He had convinced himself of that. He had wept for him, cried because the boy he had come to adore was gone and would always be gone.

But he wasn’t gone. Takumi was alive and he was awake, and he had caused that to happen somehow.

Where happiness should be in his heart, he only felt dread. Something was wrong, terribly wrong. He had done something that changed the course of fate for both Takumi and for himself. He could feel it in his very soul; he had done something _wrong_.

“Ryoma says that he woke up the day he sent his retainers and Yukimura here,” Corrin finally said, her hands wiping at her eyes, “Th-that’s why they didn’t tell us when they were here for Xander’s coronation.” A smile came over her face then, a smile Leo wished he could mirror, but he could barely even comprehend what he was feeling, “I-I can’t believe that- that he’s _alive_. I-I’ll get to see him again.”

“That is wonderful news, little princess,” Xander said, smiling gently at her from across the table.

“And it’s only because of- because of you, Leo,” Corrin continued, her eyes meeting his own, teary but so bright and alive with joy, joy that he wanted to feel himself but it was crushed down by everything else he was feeling in his heart, “You told me you would try to save him and you did. You _saved_ him, Leo.”

What could he say to that? That he was sorry? That he suddenly knew he had done something wrong? That he hadn’t truly saved Takumi but actually altered the course of their destinies?

He opened his mouth but words refused to come out so he just pressed his lips together and smiled, a forced, weak expression that Corrin accepted probably only because of the happiness clouding her vision.

She was still talking with Camilla, Xander, and Elise when he quietly excused himself from the room, gathering the book he had been reading close before he walked out. As soon as the door was closed behind him, he ran, bolting down the hall towards his own quarters as quickly as he could.

There were servants in his room taking care of the clothes he had worn for the coronation, but he couldn’t handle anyone being in his presence right then.

“Please, leave,” he said shortly, feeling how his fingers were trembling so he curled them into a fist, trying to stay composed.

“My lord, we need-”

“ _Leave_! Leave me in peace!” He hadn’t meant to yell at the servants, but he needed to be alone. They quickly bowed and exited the room quickly before he slammed the door behind himself and bolted it shut, gasping for air as he finally allowed himself to collapsed against the wall, sliding to the ground. He gripped his head in his hands, gasping as he pulled his legs up to his chest and buried his face between his knees.

Takumi was alive.

Takumi’s heart was still beating. Takumi was still breathing, awake and alive and-

And _alone_. Takumi was alone.

He had promised to be there for him. He had promised to go to him and be there to hold him and help him.

It dawned on him then that he had been making too many promises he couldn’t keep. He had broken his promise to Elise and had to fortify it with a new one. He had promised Xander that he would be alright, but he knew he wasn’t.

He was breaking, his heart and mind cracking at the seams and it wasn’t stopping. Blindly, he pushed himself to his feet, staggering to the table besides his bed to grab for Brynhildr. He opened it to the page he had memorized, gripping the book tightly in his shaking hands.

“What does it mean,” he whispered, feeling the tears that had been burning his in his eyes start to slip down his cheeks in the private space of his quarters, “I _need_ to know! Please,” he begged, feeling the magic contained in the pages start to flow into his fingertips, “Tell me!”

In a flash, he was blown back, his hands leaving Brynhildr as he was thrown from the spot he had been standing on the floor. Thankfully his bed was behind him and his body hit the softness of the mattress to absorb most of the blowback before he fell to the floor on the other side, gasping as pain flowed through his body where he landed. His head was searing, suddenly filled with words in a language he hadn’t been able to even read properly before.

Even though his vision still flashed, he stumbled upright, rushing back to grab Brynhildr up off the ground, sitting on the edge of the bed as his fingers traced the words he could suddenly read.

He read the motives of the spell with increasing horror drowning any surges of hope that had risen to his heart. Apparently, he had effectively severed part of himself, torn away part of his soul to replace the destroy part of Takumi’s. He had chased the demonic evil away from the other prince, but he had forced his own darkened soul into Takumi’s body.

He had forced him to stay alive.

He had destroyed his decision to stay in this world or move beyond it.

It was what he had wanted. He had asked Takumi to wake up and forced him back to life, and the pain he had been feeling for days was the hurt Takumi was likely feeling in Hoshido, though it was probably even more painful for him.

“Oh Gods,” he whispered, dropping Brynhildr onto the messy sheets at his side, pressing his face into his hands, feeling the wetness on his cheeks from his own tears.

_What have I done?_

_What have I done?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhhhhh I need to write my essays before I start the next chapter but that won't take me very long so I'll likely be updating at my regular pace again. I have several other leokumi fics i'm working on right now so if you like my writing I'll be posting more stuff outside this series soon! 
> 
> Thank you for reading as usual and thank you so so much if you left a comment r kudos!!!! They literally make my lIFE
> 
> I also have a twitter now! @leokuumi is the handle and i pst about leokumi trash ofc
> 
> Stay tuned for the next chapter!!! <3


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 7k.... again. Idk how sometimes it's hard for me to write like 4k words and then when I write Leo angst it just all shows up so many words. 
> 
> This was slower than expected because I was dumb and decided to write the first chapter of another AU that I thought of I'm bad I'm sorry but I will finish this soon ;u;
> 
> Thank you for reading and enjoy!!!

It took Leo several hours to feel calm enough to even leave his quarters, and still he didn’t set a foot out the door, too shaken and exhausted from the realization he made to even face other people. He had cried himself out into his pillows, letting free all the pain and guilt and hurt he had been feeling the past weeks over Takumi’s death. His heart only welcomed in new pain though after that, new hurt and an overwhelmingly different type of guilt.

It hurt, and he wanted to scream out his frustration and sorrow, but that would attract attention so he dug his teeth into his sheets and allowed silent tears to dampen his face until they wouldn’t fall any longer. He didn’t have a clue as to how he had turned out this way, so completely broken by his own actions, but if Takumi was ruined it was only fitting that he would be as well.

His chest hurt because he had destroyed himself. He was no better than Father or the kind of dark sorcery that Iago always used. Iago had controlled people against their will to do Father’s bidding, and Father had either turned a blind eye or commended him for it. Now, he was exactly the same. In death, he supposed he had finally earned his Father’s approval, but the thought of it made him feel sick. He wanted to undo his own actions, but he knew he couldn’t.

It was a vile, twisted feeling to know he had intentionally taken control of another person. He had forced life back into Takumi’s body.

He had probably forced him to love him too.

The thought dawned on him as he lay buried in his blankets, his boots not even taken off, and, though his eyes burned, new tears refused to rise. He was out of tears, but the emotion was still there, pressing down on his heart with such incessant pain that he wanted to tear it out.

Takumi didn’t love him.

Takumi would probably never recall their shared dreams as anything but comatose apparitions now that he was awake.

The thing that made him the most pathetic was that he regarded their shared dreams as some of his happiest memories in recent time, comparable to the feeling of Father praising him for claiming Brynhildr or the feeling of Xander ruffling his hair as a child when he had beaten him in a sparring match. Takumi’s love and Takumi’s light had saved him from the darkness and hopelessness that surrounded his own heart, a residual effect of fighting and fighting for so long at that.

Now though, there was no fighting, but there was no happiness, no Takumi.

And it hurt.

Eventually, he forced himself to get out of bed. His arms and legs were stiff from the curled position he had been laying in for hours and he barely had the heart to even try and stretch them. When his gaze passed over the window, he realized it was already past noon. He had wasted half a day, even more time he could have spent doing good for the kingdom. Xander hadn’t come for him though. Probably because his older brother was so concerned for his wellbeing, but that wouldn’t stop him from thinking of himself as a failure nonetheless. He had had plans for the day, things he was going to dedicate himself to, but now all that had gone up in flames with Corrin’s tears at the breakfast table.

He stood and felt his legs nearly gave out, prickling with numbness as blood flow returned to them. He sat on the edge of bed and winced as he stretched his arms above his head and his legs out in front of him. His entire body was overcome with exhaustion, tired and aching from the emotional toll of the day. When he finally stood and passed by his own reflection in the mirror, he stopped, sighing heavily at the image in front of him.

His eyes were dull with exhaustion and red-rimmed from his tears, accented with dark circles evident of his tiredness. He knew he couldn’t face his family looking the way he did. It would be too shameful, too telling that something was wrong.

Elise wanted him to be happy. He had promised her he would try to be happy.

Xander wanted him to be well. He had promised him he would try to be well.

Clearly, he was failing in both aspects.

He had promised Takumi that he would go to him, to hold him and care for him while he recuperated from what had happened to him once he awoke.

That broken promise was the worst of them all. It pained him the worst, and every time he thought about it, it sank in deeper that Takumi probably thought he was a liar, a disgusting Nohrian he should have never trusted in the first place.

If Takumi even remembered him.

Deciding the day was a lost cause, he dressed for bed. Should Xander or any of his other siblings question his whereabouts, he could easily pass it off as not feeling well. Gods knew he looked the part.

Niles and Odin dared to enter his room later that night, no doubt having heard word of his momentary outburst from the maids. He waved them off as well, telling them he wasn’t feeling well and that he just wanted to be alone.

And of course they sent Xander to him instead of just letting him be.

In return, Xander ordered for food to be brought to him, his favorite preparation of soup with several slices of bread and a steaming cup of tea. He heard Xander murmuring some quiet words of caring, his tone gentle, something about how he wished him to feel better before the door shut quietly behind him.

The smell of the soup finally got him sitting up upon realization that he was starving. He ate it quickly, feeling the hot liquid warming him from the inside out, doing its best to chase away the cold that had encompassed his heart and mind and body.

After finished with the food, he fell into a fitful sleep, awakening constantly with the image of Takumi laying dead and bloody flashing in his eyes. He sat at the window until dawn broke against the horizon, letting the cold of the glass seep into him. He didn’t deserve the warmth of his bed nor of his siblings’ love.

He didn’t deserve Takumi’s warmth either, not after what he had done to the other prince. There would be no true coming to terms with it; he knew that already.

It would start to fade a bit eventually, but the constant feeling of his guilt and horror at his own actions would always be there, lurking in his heart and infecting his mind with doubt, and he would accept it. He had no choice in the matter.

The next few weeks saw little change in his demeanor. Leo tried to keep himself brighter and happier around his siblings, but the very concept exhausted him. He tried the hardest around Elise, playing with her when she asked even when he had to force smiles onto his lips.

The only reprieve to his routine came whenever Corrin got a letter from Prince Ryoma in Hoshido. He would inquire as to what it said and Corrin would always be forthcoming at first, but after several letters about Takumi, he saw suspicion and concern starting in her eyes.

The first letter was heartbreaking to hear Corrin read. Prince Ryoma had written that Takumi was completely bedridden, despondent for the most part and too weak to even sit up without help. Leo felt his heart aching and he wanted to cry into his hands because he had done that. He had _done that_. He had made Takumi that weak and in pain.

The second letter from Prince Ryoma came about a week or so after the first announcement that Takumi had awoken. Corrin read to him that Takumi was in better spirits especially after getting to see Princess Hinoka and Princess Sakura, and Princess Sakura was adamant about keeping him company nearly every day. It soothed Leo a bit knowing that Takumi wasn’t alone. He was clearly loved so fiercely by his siblings. There was no way he was short on affection.

In that respect, Takumi didn’t need him. Leo was only bad for him. Takumi had love from other places and he was the unnecessary element that was rightly cut out.

“I hope Princess Sakura is doing better,” Elise said softly when they had been having a tea party one afternoon in her quarters.

“What do you mean?” he questioned, setting down the cup of “tea” that Elise had brewed, which mostly consisted of sugar and water.

“Well, she was really sad when we left Hoshido,” Elise hummed, “She obviously loves her big brother a lot… just like I love you! And Xander! But she was really sad because she thought she would lose him, but now he’s getting better so I think she would be happier, right?”

“I suppose so,” Leo said, feigning another sip of the sugar water just to satisfy Elise, “You’re not still angry with her for trying to steal you big sister away from you, are you?” he teased lightly, recalling her adamant words towards Princess Sakura during the war.

“What? No! Of course not!” Elise gasped before she giggled, “Corrin is everyone’s sister now that we’re not fighting anymore! Princess Sakura seems really nice too.”

“Perhaps you two could become friends some day,” Leo suggested with a shrug of his shoulder, “You’re around the same age.”

“That’s right! And I know one thing we have in common already!” Elise smiled wide and bright at him across the table.

“What’s that?”

“Well,” she hummed, suddenly looking a bit bashful, “I would be really, really sad too,” she murmured, “If you were to be as hurt as Princess Sakura’s big brother… We’re alike in that! And we both love Corrin lots too,” she finished quite matter-o-factly, her smile bright again, “Ah! Leo! You have to finish _all_ your tea!”

“Alright, alright,” Leo acquiesced with a huff, “I’ll drink it all.” He hid the small smile that came to his lips at Elise’s cheer that followed his words in the brim of the tea cup.

There seemed to be no end to Prince Ryoma’s letters and each one was slightly more optimistic than the last concerning Takumi’s condition. Most recently he had informed Corrin, and Leo by proxy, that Takumi had started to walk himself around his own quarters again. The was comforting at least, to know that Takumi was getting better instead of getting worse, that his spirit to live wasn’t truly destroyed after all.

When he saw Corrin in the hall on the way to breakfast the day after that letter from Prince Ryoma, he opened his mouth to greet her only for her to cut him off with a sharp question.

“Why are you so interested in my letters from Ryoma?”

It would be simple enough to lie, to say he was just concerned with the diplomacy between their kingdoms or when Prince Ryoma’s coronation would finally happen, but nothing came to mind and he merely stood in front of his sister with no words with which to quell her narrowed eyes and pursed lips.

“Is it because of Takumi?” Corrin finally asked when he made no move to answer.

“Why would you say that?” Leo asked hesitantly, not denying the allegation but not confirming it either. This was a careful situation. He couldn’t let too much of his guilt slip. Corrin was always excellent at reading him. She had sharp eyes and a quick mind that caught the slightest shifts in expression, especially his expressions. She could decipher him quickly, too quickly.

“Well, that’s the only reasonable explanation,” Corrin huffed, rolling her eyes in exasperation, “I don’t have any issue with sharing the details of big brother’s letters with you, Leo, but I worry for you.”

“Why would you worry for me?” He asked hurriedly, “I mean, about this. Why would you fret?”

“Because you,” Corrin started before she pressed her lips together, looking away briefly before her gaze was back on his face, “Because you- you were the one who- who-”

“Who almost killed your brother?” he finished for her because he knew it would be hard for her to get the words out. Corrin could read him quickly, but the talent was reciprocated to a great extent.

“Leo,” Corrin started, and he could hear in the low, gentle way her voice formed his name that she was going to start placating him. He didn’t need that. He didn’t want that either.

He didn’t deserve that.

“What would you have done?” He asked, “If I had ended your brother’s life? What if that letter from Prince Ryoma came to you only to tell you that Prince Takumi was dead. What then? Don’t lie to me, sister. I know you would have hated me.”

“I would not have _hated_ you,” Corrin said, defiance in her tone, “Leo, please, I would not have hated you in the slightest. Perhaps, yes, I would have felt some resentment out of sorrow, but- but what you did, you did it for me, so I wouldn’t have to cut down my own brother with the high possibility of- of ending his life. I’m so grateful to you, but at the same time I have seen how that decision has changed you.”

“I don’t know what you’re-”

“You’re not the same, Leo,” Corrin murmured, not even allowing him to finish his sentence, his lie, “I can tell. You’re different now, but if hearing how Takumi is doing helps with your feelings on the matter, then I will continue to come to you when I receive a letter from Ryoma, only if you want to me to of course.” She smiled then, soft and knowing, and in that moment he thanked the Gods that fate had allowed Corrin to choose him, to choose Nohr over her birth family.

It broke his heart even more nonetheless.

If she had chosen Hoshido, Takumi wouldn’t have had to go through any of the pain and fear and anger he was saddled with.

If she had chosen Hoshido, the boy he loved would have been free.

What right did he have to be the little brother she chose? He was dark and warped by Father’s command. He wasn’t worthy of being saved by her nor by Xander nor by Takumi.

“I would- appreciate that, sister,” he finally said quietly, “Thank you for thinking of me.”

“I’ll always think about you, little brother,” Corrin teased sweetly, “Who else is going to tell you when you have something on inside out or backwards?” She laughed and he felt his cheeks flush in embarrassment, instinctive indignation rising up inside him, but the feeling was quelled again when Corrin grabbed his hand, “Come on. Let’s go to breakfast.” He gave a quiet sigh and a nod before he followed along after her to join their other siblings.

Even as he ate with his siblings, his thoughts were of Takumi.

He thought of him while he sorted through papers Xander had to look over.

He thought of him as he sat in the bath that night until his fingers pruned from the warm water soaking into them.

Laying in bed, his thoughts were only of Takumi, longing for him, longing for him to be well, to be alive and happy again.

He couldn’t have him; there was no way after what he had done. The best he could do was wait and wish and _pray_ that Takumi would recover and never discover the truth of what had been done to him. There didn’t need to be another war over the consequences of a divided soul. From what Leo had read about procedures like that of what he had done to himself and Takumi, the pain he felt wasn’t reciprocated. Takumi was whole again, but now Leo himself was torn, shredded, not nearly as whole as he was before.

That was alright. That was fine. He was fine with never being whole again if it meant Takumi could live the rest of his life untouched by possession and unknowing of what exactly had happened to bring him to life.

As he fell asleep into another dreamless night, he convinced himself that it was right that way, as it should be.

The days dragged on into the next week before Prince Ryoma made contact with Corrin again, and when he did he sent three letters: one to Corrin, one to the King of Nohr, and one to Xander, which was peculiar that he would address Xander so informally. Leo’s interest was piqued, but he cared more about what Prince Ryoma had to say about Takumi.

“Ah, it’s an invitation to Prince Ryoma’s coronation,” Xander hummed as he opened the more formal of the letters first, the paper stamped with the Kingdom of Hoshido’s seal, “We’ll have to make preparations to travel at once.”

“We’re going to Hoshido?” Elise gasped, “Really? That will be so fun!” She laughed brightly and practically hung over Xander’s arm from her seat at the dinner table to read the invitation, “ _Big brother_! Let me _see_!”

“Leo,” Corrin’s voice tugged his attention from where Elise was grabbing excitedly for the invitation that Xander was holding just out of her reach, “Ryoma says that there’s nothing to report really,” she shrugged, folding the letter that was addressed to her over in her hands, “They sent out invitations for the coronation because Takumi proved himself strong enough to start going about daily life again.”

That was it then? Takumi was just- alright now? As if nothing had happened?

Nothing _had_ happened.

“Oh,” he finally breathed out, forcing a small smile, “Thank you for letting me know.”

“Leo,” Corrin said softly, a smile on her lips, “That’s a good thing, you know. Try and look a bit more pleased, little brother,” she teased, and her hand came to graze his own gently, “You did nothing wrong, Leo… Nothing permanent. Takumi is strong and he came back from what happened to him, and he could only do that because you freed him from that _thing_ that was using his body.”

“I-”

_I didn’t free him from anything._

“I know,” he finally got out, swallowing down the words that wanted to rise up from his throat. He couldn’t tell Corrin what he had done to her brother. He couldn’t tell anyone. Even with peace treaties nearly completed, what he had done was an act of war. He didn’t doubt that he could use Takumi as a spy into Hoshido if he wanted to, and the thought of that made his stomach twist and he wanted to be sick.

He pushed his plate away, suddenly too nauseated to feel hungry any longer, before he stood, catching Xander’s attention.

“I’ll be waiting by your quarters, brother, if you want to finish what we were working on earlier.”

After Leo left the dining room, he took a few minutes to just breathe, an exercise he realized he’d been doing quite a bit lately. With all the thoughts and emotions raging in his head and in his heart, he found himself short of breath, forgetting to breathe under the onslaught of stress.

Xander met him outside his office a little while later and they quietly got back to the work they had been doing on an agreement with a noble family that lived in the mountains. When Xander got up a while later to address the servants on arrangements for travel to Hoshido, he found his eyes wandering to the letter Prince Ryoma had written his brother where it sat on his desk.

It was rather informal with the greeting containing no honorifics of “King” or “Lord” on Xander’s name. It made him wonder if they had written letters before. Had they been in contact this entire time and he’d been too caught up in his own head to notice?

The letter was simple enough. Prince Ryoma evidentially still felt badly about not being able to attend Xander’s coronation in person, but he extended a longer stay in Hoshido to him so that they may have time to relax and discuss what was needed between their two nations. It was entirely diplomatic of him, but there was a certain feeling of warmth to Prince Ryoma’s written words, and for a brief moment before Xander came back into the room he considered the fact that perhaps Prince Ryoma and his brother were friends. As often as Corrin had said that he and Takumi were similar, she had always said the same of Xander and Prince Ryoma.

It just made the war seem all the more inane. Where distrust and hatred had grown for years, there could have been friendship and understanding if only Father had never developed the twisted need to conquer another kingdom. It was a sad situation, one that could be remedied to an extent now, especially between Xander and Prince Ryoma, and between Elise and Princess Sakura, but the war had destroyed his own chances to be on the same terms with Takumi.

The war had bent him badly enough to cause him to break someone else.

He could never go back.

* * *

Travel arrangements to Hoshido were put together quickly despite the fact that no Nohrian royalty had officially traveled to Hoshido in decades. Some of Xander’s older advisers remembered the days when there was more peace between Hoshido and Nohr and they had the necessary information for travel to Hoshido.

Elise had been talking about the travel non-stop, constantly asking Leo if the pink trees she had heard about would be in bloom or if she would have to eat food with sticks. He had told her that, yes, springtime in Hoshido did bring out pink flowers on cherry blossom trees, and he had helped her get used to using chopsticks rather than forks and knives. He had been reading up on the utensils and had been practicing using them himself, but it was surprisingly difficult. He only hoped that when they arrived in Hoshido he wouldn’t embarrass himself in front of the people that were meant to be their allies now.

And of course he wouldn’t want to embarrass himself in front of Takumi.

Even if he and the other prince could never be more than acquaintances in his mind, he still didn’t want to seem like a fool in front of him.

The prospect of the visit filled Leo with more dread than anything else. He still didn’t know if Takumi recalled their shared dreams as vividly as he did and, if he did, Leo didn’t know if he had pieced together what had happened to him or rather not thought of it at all.

His thoughts kept him awake for most of the night before the day they were due to leave, and come morning he was exhausted but filled with nervous energy nonetheless.

He shared a carriage with Xander on the way to Hoshido. Camilla was with Elise and Corrin in another carriage, but Xander insisted he share with him so they could enjoy each other’s company on the long ride to the other kingdom. There was no doubt that Xander had picked up on his exhaustion and his yearning to be alone, but his brother was selflessly caring, and even when he didn’t want company Xander could tell he needed it.

“I don’t think anyone could be as excited as Elise about visiting Hoshido,” Xander started, breaking the silence between them for the first time after the carriage had left Nohr a while before, “But tell me you’re at least slightly anticipatory, Leo.” He smiled then, hopeful and honest, but Leo still knew a lie was the best to placate his brother’s question.

“It’ll be interesting at least,” he gave a half shrug, “A learning experience.”

“Well, I think it will be a lot more than just something observational,” Xander said gently, “I know Elise is excited to meet Princess Sakura in an environment that is not hostile. I foresee them being good friends, don’t you think?”

“Yeah, they should get along I assume. It’ll be nice for Elise to have a friend her own age,” he smiled softly before pulling his gaze to his lap, hoping Xander would end the conversation at that.

“Perhaps you and Prince Takumi may even become friends by that logic.” He looked up quickly, his eyes meeting Xander’s, and he saw nothing but the same gentle concern he had been seeing in the depths of his brother’s warm gaze for weeks.

“I doubt that could be a possibility,” he huffed, but it sounded more like a sigh and he saw the way Xander’s gaze darkened.

“Do you think you and Prince Takumi are too different to be friends? You’re around the same age, and from what Corrin tells me, you two are quite similar in many topics.”

“Xander,” he said quickly, “You _know_ why I cannot be friends with him,” he frowned, knowing his words came out a bit too acidic, but Xander didn’t seem to mind.

“If you think you cannot interact with Prince Takumi because you were the one who struck him down when he was cursed, then I am telling you that is a silly reason,” Xander said, his voice sterner than before, “You did only as was necessary in that moment, Leo. Prince Takumi would have killed each and everyone of us, starting with our sister. He was out of control and-”

“I _know_ that!” Leo snapped before he could stop himself, “Don’t you think I know that already? I know what I did! And what I did was-” He couldn’t tell Xander. As much as he wanted to break down and cry and have Xander aid him with all that was weighing on his heart, he simply couldn’t. Xander was his brother but he was also the King of Nohr, and as King of Nohr he couldn’t keep the repercussions of what Leo had done secret.

Only he himself could keep it secret and private, held close to his heart where only he could access the truth.

“Leo?” Xander said softly, an urge in his voice for him to continue speaking, but Leo just shook his head, curling his hands into fists against his thighs.

“Nothing, nothing,” he whispered, “What I did was… It was necessary, I know that.”

“This _has_ been eating at you then,” Xander murmured, “When I asked you before, and you denied me, I knew you were not being truthful, little brother.”

“Xander, I-”

“It’s alright to be scared of your own actions, Leo,” Xander continued before he could protest, “As King, every move I make for our kingdom terrifies me, but it helps that I have you, and all my other advisers of course, to help me make the right decisions. In that moment, you only had yourself, and I’m sorry it has taken me so long to realize that you- that you’re _suffering_ with this.”

He felt a lump form in his throat at Xander’s words and the unmistakable burn of tears started at the corners of his eyes. He couldn’t speak, his throat locked up with emotion so he just looked away, down at his lap, at the floor, at his boots, anywhere that wasn’t Xander’s face so he wouldn’t have to see the look in his brother’s kind eyes.

“You don’t have to struggle with this anymore, Leo, and if you still think you do, then you won’t have to suffer alone. Prince Takumi is awake and, from what Ryoma has told me, he’s going to be just fine,” Xander said after a long moment, “I’m here for you, you know that, don’t you? Whenever you need me, I’m here for you.”

“I know,” Leo said slowly, swallowing after hearing how hoarse his voice was, rough with the threat of tears, “Thank you, Xander.”

If only he could tell Xander how wrong he was. Takumi wasn’t fine. He wasn’t fine either.

“Perhaps you should get some rest,” Xander suggested lightly, but the meaning was strong behind his words. Leo knew he probably looked exhausted, and Xander’s sharp eyes had undoubtedly pinpointed that before they even left Nohr that morning, “I’ll wake you when we are close to the castle, alright?”

“Alright,” Leo relented, deciding that some rest would be good for him. He made himself comfortable on the cushioned side of the carriage he was sitting on. Even with how the carriage rolled and bumped down the road, he gave into his tiredness and welcomed sleep.

True to his word, Xander shook him awake a while later. There was no sunlight streaming through the small windows in the carriage anymore and he realized it was already nightfall. He sat up slowly, blinking groggily as he stretched his arms over his head.

“We’re nearly at the castle,” Xander informed him, “The route we are on takes a while longer, but it avoids the attention we would receive going through the castle’s main town. Ryoma advised this path and my advisers agreed with him.”

“It would be good not to attract attention,” Leo nodded, yawning into the back of his hand, “Surely there are some Hoshidans that would still resent Nohr after the war.”

“Right you are, little brother,” Xander hummed, a glint of pride in his eyes as he looked at him, “Are you feeling better now that you have rested?”

“I suppose,” he shrugged.

“That’s good.” Xander fell quiet after that, gazing out the window at the darkened land of Hoshido as they neared the castle.

When the carriage stopped, Leo wondered if his own heart would too. It had been beating faster and faster as they neared the castle, the threat of Takumi’s presence near him making his chest hurt like it hadn’t since Takumi had woken up.

Would Takumi hate him immediately? Or would he simmer in it and not mention it the entire time they were in the same castle.

Did Takumi remember their dreams? If he did, did he remember them with fondness or with disgust?

Did Takumi want to taste his lips as much as Leo wanted to taste his?

He had wanted to feel his lips and his hands for so long. He wanted to hold Takumi in his arms and not relent until everything was alright.

He was desperate to love him, but he couldn’t allow himself the right. That would be too much, too selfish.

“Leo,” Xander’s voice came then and a firm hand fell onto his shoulder, “You look pale. Are you alright?”

“I’m fine, I’m okay,” he breathed out quickly, nodding several times, “I’m okay.”

“I’m here for you,” Xander said simply, his hand squeezing Leo’s shoulder gently before it fell away and he reached for the handle on the carriage door.

“Takumi!”

Corrin’s cry of her brother’s name was the first thing he heard on Hoshidan soil. He watched her leave her carriage quickly running forward and then-

Takumi was there, not even ten feet from him. He looked the same as he had the first time Leo had seen him when Corrin had chosen Nohr over Hoshido. His hair was neat, tied back in the ponytail he always donned. His clothes were different of course. He had shed the leather, fur, and dense cloth of his armor for simpler clothes, some sort of Hoshidan style robe with several layers all died a deep blue in color.

Takumi was there, and he was the same. There was no pain etched into his features, no visible scars on his skin. He was whole, sustained by Leo’s own soul, and it hurt to look at him.

It hurt even more when he watched Corrin’s arms wrap around him and pull him close. She could talk to him. Takumi was her brother, but they were strangers to each other.

He had often felt envious of Corrin for the attention she received from their siblings, but now he felt envious of her interaction with the boy who was her true brother and the one his heart had been aching for for weeks on end.

Takumi and Corrin exchanged quiet words before Corrin pulled away altogether, moving to greet her other sisters and other older brother. In that moment, Takumi’s gaze moved, rising to connect with his own eyes.

It was staggering.

The feeling of being physically connected spilled over his entire body, the emotion of it stemming from his heart and filling him. Being this close to Takumi felt like coming home, like he was regaining so much of himself that he had lost.

He had lost part of himself. He had given himself to Takumi, and they were so close, just on the brink of being truly reconnected.

He wanted to run to him and hold him.

Panic flowed through him them, strong and terrifying. He could feel how his breath was catching in his throat, refusing to go in nor out of his lungs, and he had to pull his gaze away, looking down and to the side so he could recover from the sudden onslaught of what was happening to him.

It was too much. He loved Takumi too much to go to him. If he felt this way, this overwhelmed and terrified, he could only imagine was Takumi was feeling. His chest throbbed with the pain of it and despite his efforts he couldn’t will the feeling away just yet.

He wanted to run to him, but he couldn’t, so instead he turned towards Xander, to where Prince Ryoma was beckoning everyone inside the castle for dinner, and tried to ignore the heartache.

It didn’t help that he ended up being seated besides Takumi at dinner. The other prince was so close, their arms only an inch or two apart. He could lean over and feel his warmth if he wanted to.

He did want to. He wanted to so badly.

Instead he sat rigidly, not trusting his own self-control when anywhere near Takumi. The other boy made him irrational, and maybe it was good to be irrational, to let go and love sometimes, but not now.

Never with Takumi.

When the food was served to them by Hoshidan servants, it came with chopsticks as Leo had expected. He looked over to see Princess Sakura kindly helping Elise with her own and he was relieved, knowing the concept of the utensils had been hard for his little sister to grasp.

Evidentially he spent more time trying to help her than he did on himself. The chopsticks were made of smooth wood, clearly meant for royalty rather than average people, and they slid wrongly between his fingers as he tried to pick up the food with them. He let out a huff of frustration and decided it was truly hopeless after a piece of fish slipped from the ends of the chopsticks for the fourth time, and he debated just stabbing the utensils into the food instead. That would work better, but it probably wouldn’t look too good in front of Hoshidan royalty accustomed to the cutlery.

“Do you want some help?” The hauntingly familiar sounds of Takumi’s voice reached his ears then, the same voice as he had heard countless times in his dreams. Takumi was speaking to him, regarding him with a questioning tone about-

About his inability to use Hoshidan utensils.

It wasn’t what Leo would have hoped for for the topic of their first honest conversation without a war behind them, but it was something and he would accept it regardless.

“I didn’t anticipate requiring assistance,” he huffed, frowning down at the plate in front of him before he cast Takumi a careful, sideways glance, “I assure you I read extensively about Hoshidan customs prior to travelling here.”

“I do not doubt that you did,” Takumi shrugged in return, “Corrin did tell me that you’re regarded as something of a genius in Nohr, but even geniuses need help sometimes. Here, let me.” Before he could realize what was happening, before he could pull away in alarm, Takumi’s hand was on his own, guiding and gentle, the warmth of it bleeding into his own skin. He let out a hurried, quiet breath that he hoped Takumi hadn’t heard.

His racing heart calmed quickly at Takumi’s touch, and he felt his frustration being sapped away. His skin burned and tingled pleasantly where Takumi’s hand lay against his own. If he could have it his way, he would never let the feeling end. He would tangle his fingers in Takumi’s own, hold his hand and squeeze gently around his palm.

But instead Takumi’s fingers guided him on how to hold utensils, like he was a child learned how to ride a horse.

“You- y-you um, need to adjust your grip,” Takumi’s voice came again, a little higher in pitch, a slight stutter on his words, “Hold this one like you would a pen, and then the second one rests right here, like this,” And with that, their interaction was over, and Takumi was pulling away, leaving his hand and his satisfyingly searing skin accurately holding the chopsticks. He tested them with careful movements before he reached and finally picked up a piece of fish that didn’t immediately fall from his grasp.

“Ah… Thank you, Prince Takumi,” he sighed in relief, too hungry to not eat for the sake of his pride, “I… I really appreciate your help.”

“I know,” Takumi said with a smile, a smile that reached the deepest depths of Leo’s heart, “I-I mean, you’re welcome.” The other prince covered his first statement quickly and Leo could see a slight pinkness to his cheeks that hadn’t been there before.

It was a strange response, one that Takumi clearly wanted to disguise the meaning of, and Leo would allow him to because he didn’t have the right to pry. He had given away the right to ever pry. He gave a soft smirk at Takumi’s comment and the cute flush on his cheeks, forcing his attention away so that he could finally eat instead.

“If you want, I think we have Nohrian-like cutlery in storage,” Takumi spoke again as Leo shakily lifted a second piece of fish to his mouth, chewing it slowly to favor the unfamiliar taste. He blinked in surprise at Takumi’s offer, but he shook his head as he picked up another piece of food.

“That won’t be necessary,” he said as he lifted his chopsticks to his mouth, “I would not require my hosts to go to great lengths to aid in my comfort. I will become more adept with these soon.” And he would. He could master anything: a sword, a tome, even Hoshidan cutlery. It would be an embarrassment to his pride and title as a Nohrian Prince to be unable to use chopsticks.

Though the food was good, his eyes went straight to Takumi when the Hoshidan prince moved a while later, standing from the table and excusing himself with a quiet bow and a murmured excuse that he was tired. Prince Ryoma gave him a nod and a soft smile, one that Leo had seen far too many times on Xander’s own face. He watched Takumi’s back as he exited the dining room, wishing he had the strength to chase after him and corner him in the hall, kiss him as badly as he wanted to be kissed back and hold him close.

He was powerless despite his strongest desires so he stayed put and waited until the meal was over.

As he walked down the hall in the unfamiliar castle away from the dining room, he heard quick footsteps behind him before Elise’s voice interrupted the quiet peace of the hall.

“Big brother!” Elise called for him and she reached him quickly as he turned around. Princess Sakura was behind her, shyly regarding him with hesitance written all over her face, “Big brother, Sakura has something she wants to say to you!”

“Really?” Leo asked out, turning his full body towards the young princesses.

“Yes, really!” Elise smiled widely, “Go on, Sakura! Leo may look grumpy, but he doesn’t bite!”

“O-oh um… Okay,” Princess Sakura stammered, weaving her fingers together as she walked out from Elise’s shadow, “P-Prince Leo,” she started, her voice still quiet and her eyes on her feet before her gaze moved up to meet his own quickly, burning with a kind of light he had never seen before, “Thank you for saving my big brother, Prince Leo!” Her small figure dipped into a deep bow then and he could see how her shoulders were shaking a bit with the emotions that had been loaded in her words. He had only ever heard the soft-spoken princess that loud one other time.

When she had _screamed_ , begged and sobbed for Takumi to wake up, knelt at his bedside with her hands clasped and tears on her pale cheeks.

Now though, her words were strong, filled with appreciativeness and gratitude beyond anything he had ever heard from another person before. Elise was looking at him expectantly, her violet eyes and small smile imploring him to answer the princess who had apparently become her new friend over dinner.

“Y-you’re welcome, Princess Sakura.” He said the words, but deep down, he knew he still didn’t believe it. Only he knew that he hadn’t truly saved Takumi.

But Takumi’s younger sister didn’t need to know that, and as Princess Sakura rose from her bow, her eyes teary with joy, her soft lips curved into a delicate smile, and her cheeks flushed with bashfulness, he figured that maybe, maybe he had done a small bit of good in the world if he had made such a gentle soul smile and appear in such a glad way.

“See, Sakura?” Elise giggled happily, reaching to take Princess Sakura’s hand in her own, “I told you it would be okay! Thanks Leo!”

“Of course,” Princess Sakura murmured, the smile still on her lips, “Thank you, Lady Elise, and you as well, Prince Leo.”

“Just _Elise_ , Sakura! We’re friends now!”

He bid them goodnight then, leaving the princesses to whatever they would talk about into the night. He knew Elise could keep someone awake for hours until she fell asleep herself, and he felt a bit badly for Princess Sakura in that respect.

As he lay in bed that night, feeling the cool satin of Hoshidan sheets against his skin, he wondered for the first time if maybe he hadn’t done something completely evil.

Princess Sakura was happy. Corrin was happy. Takumi was alive.

That was his poetic justice. That was all that he would get.

It would have to be enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again for reading ahhh I feel like I can never thank you guys enough!! ;u;
> 
> I can't believe it took so long to get Leo's butt to Hoshido bUT IT FINALLY HAPPENED. HE'S THERE NOW. HE DID IT so proud ;;;u;;;
> 
> Thank you once again for reading and any kudos or comments that are left! they make me so so happy I can't even iterate with words how excited I get to read comments even if they're just incoherent caps <3 (those are some of my faves ;w;)
> 
> Stay tuned for chapter five! >wo


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is, chapter 5! *jazz hands* ouo;
> 
> I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it!!! (there was much hilarity on twitter I cry every time)
> 
> Thank you for reading and enjoy! <3

The next morning was quiet in Castle Shirasagi. Xander and Prince Ryoma had declared the night before that they had work to do in the morning so that left Leo on his own for the entirety of the day. He didn’t doubt that Elise would be off with Princess Sakura all day, and Camilla had been adamant about spending an entire day in the Hoshidan hot springs she had heard about from Princess Hinoka.

Leo didn’t mind being left alone for the day. Rather, Hoshido had a lot to digest. He had never experienced anything like Hoshidan customs, culture, people, architecture, food, anything. Everything was new, and he briefly thought that it would nice to share it with someone else, someone like Takumi, but he forced the thoughts away. Takumi had been tired the previous day at dinner, and that had worried him. Prince Ryoma had said in one of his letters to Corrin that Takumi still exhausted himself easily and had to rest more than before the war, but apparently he was getting better.

Leo knew he would give anything to have the other prince get better, back to what he was before the war, before he had been corrupted and used, and then nearly killed at his hand.

He was sure Takumi had had enough of him after the dinner, and it still embarrassed him that the other prince had to help with something as mundane as using chopsticks.

The servants had left him a tray for food for breakfast in his quarters, the likes of which he scarcely recognized. Upon trying the bowl of soup, he realized it was miso soup, the dish Takumi had told him about in such great detail, the dish he had tried to replicate for himself. It was far better than what he had made and, though it burned his tongue, he ate it swiftly, suddenly realizing his hunger.

There was a bowl of white rice and a small pot of tea accompanied with a cup. When he poured the tea, the color of it was a pale green rather than the typical amber shade he was used to. He blinked at the tea, suddenly beyond perplexed. Hoshidans drank tea that was green in color? That was completely absurd, but he couldn’t help raising the cup to his lips, sipping the liquid lightly.

It wasn’t bad tasting so he hesitantly drank the entire cup of it, but he didn’t pour out anymore, still unsure about the overall taste of the tea.

Hoshido was strange; that was for certain. It would be ideal to have Takumi teach him about Hoshidan cuisine and customs, but he knew he couldn’t ask that of the other prince. If anything, he wished to find him and apologize.

He had to apologize for forcing him through weeks and weeks of pain and weakness.

He had made Takumi frail and bedridden, and he knew how much the other boy craved to be strong. Because of him, Takumi had been living one of his biggest insecurities for so long, and he was probably still living that way, trying to get back to how he was before Leo ruined everything.

That was his only goal for that day. He was suddenly desperate to find Takumi and apologize, and then leave him again. He was toxic, a poison that had ruined aspects of Takumi’s life that could possibly never be repaired. The closer they became, the more his guilt would haunt him, eating away at his heart and soul until there was nothing left.

Maybe he was self-destructive, but he found he wouldn’t mind being close to Takumi for just a little while, even if it would be the end of him.

He pushed the tray of food aside before he went off in search of his clothes. They were all packed tightly into a large trunk, and he didn’t quite know what the weather would be like in Hoshido so he had instructed the maids to bring some of everything. Hoshido was cool in mid-springtime from the gentle wind that blew through the land, but under the sun it was still hot, overly warm without the gentle touch of the wind. He ended up dressing casually, donning a thin, grey colored tunic and simple slacks, pulling on his boots. He wouldn’t be caught dead in those strange, casual shoes the Hoshidan wore, the ones made of wood. He could see himself easily falling flat on his face when trying to walk in something like that, and even though they had been offered to him by the Hoshidan maidens, he had declined.

There would be some aspects of Hoshidan culture that he would decline to try and enjoy.

Castle Shirasagi itself was a confusing maze. Every hallway looked identical, as did all of the doors to every room. It had taken him several moments to realize there was no door handles because the doors simply slid open and shut. He didn’t know how well that worked for privacy, especially with the barely opaque screens in the doors being the only barriers for modesty, but he wouldn’t neglect to appreciate every aspect of Hoshidan culture that he could.

After all, he couldn’t envision himself returning to the kingdom for quite some time, if not ever again after Prince Ryoma’s coronation. There was no need for him to ever return, no need for him to further contribute to the plight he already created within the royal family.

Eventually, he found himself outside the large doors to a room he guessed were Takumi’s quarters. He recognized the cobalt-haired female leaning against the doorframe as one of Takumi’s retainers that they had beaten while Takumi was attempted to defend Hoshido.

“Pardon me,” he spoke easily, approaching the lancer. She reached out, gripping the naginata at her side menacingly, passing it from hand to held briefly before she finally looked at him.

“What do you want?” She huffed, her frown ever-present on her face.

“I was hoping I may find Prince Takumi here,” he said, raising an eyebrow at the girl.

“Why would you be hoping that exactly?”

“No particular reason,” he shrugged, “I’m sorry, have I done something to offend you, Oboro? That is your name, isn’t it? I apologize if I haven’t recollected properly.”

“Yeah, that’s my name,” Oboro rolled her eyes, “Great job remembering it…”

“Are you always this rude to visiting dignitaries?” Leo asked sharply, narrowing his eyes at Takumi’s retainer.

“Only when they’re filth from Nohr,” Oboro sneered back, her face contorting into a somewhat terrifying scowl. Leo frowned harder at the uncouth girl, narrowing his eyes in distaste. How Takumi could pick someone so impolite as his retainer was beyond him, but perhaps Takumi was a different person when he had taken this girl on.

“Is Prince Takumi present here or not?” He asked again, truly not in the mood for anymore sass from his girl.

“Again, why would you want to know?” Oboro sighed, twirling her lance in between her fingers, her gaze fixed on him. Leo knew he didn’t need this kind of insubordination from people below him, people that were supposed to be their allies now. He breathed out a sigh, closing his eyes for a long moment. He could feel no pull in his chest towards the inside for the room, no warm presence of Takumi’s soul contained behind the doors. With that, he turned on his heel, starting to walk away.

“Hey!” Oboro called, “Where are you going?” she frowned, “I thought you wanted to see Lord Takumi. I can let you in if you want.” She grinned then, a conniving smirk on her lips that was truly distasteful, not at all becoming of her features.

“I already know Prince Takumi is not in there,” he called back, smirking haughtily at her, “If you mean to play me for a fool, I’ll have you know that rarely anyone ever bests me in mind games, and especially not petty little girls like you.” He knew his words were harsh, but he still felt satisfied as he walked away, leaving Oboro staring after him. It hadn’t taken much to set his mood on edge, and he really didn’t have time to deal with insignificant Hoshidan retainers, especially if a conversation with one of them got him nowhere towards his ultimate goal.

He found himself being led by his feet instead of his head, eventually exiting the castle and starting to walk over the castle grounds. The sight of Hoshido in the early afternoon light was fascinating. Nohr never looked so bright. The grass was green and damp under his boots, the wetness of it reflected and quickly drying in the sun’s light. The sunlight was strong, the sun at it’s highest position in the sky, sending warmth and life down onto Hoshido’s lands.

Leo could count the number of times on one hand that the sun had shone that brightly in Nohr during his entire life, and when it did it had scorched the water from streams and rivers, drying everything until the light faded behind clouds, leaving Nohr in the dark again, but now without any sort of moisture to water crops with.

Still it was better that way. Nohr was more fit to live in the dark.

He was more suited for the dark. Takumi was too light, and he knew that, but he found himself addicted to him, addicted to his warmth.

He paused under the branches of some of the many cherry blossom trees on the castle grounds, sighing softly as he smelled the sweet scent from the flowers, his boots light onto top of a layer of fallen petals. Hoshido was truly to soft, too gentle for him to ever be a part of it. He belonged in Nohr, in the dark, where he and Xander could work their lives away trying to make their kingdom just a little bit better.

And they likely wouldn’t get very far in the end. The darkness was what had corrupted Father, eaten him alive until nothing was left but the dregs of a tortured soul. He shuddered, suddenly feeling a chill go through him.

_Please…_

_Gods, save me from Father’s fate._

He could only pray, beg whatever unseen forces in the world were still paying attention to him to save him, to give him an early death before he became less than alive himself. He hoped Xander and Camilla and Elise would be saved too. Better them than him. They were still whole, Camilla and Xander darkened a bit by years under Father’s reign, but they were still complete unlike him. They could live their lives hopefully in full.

He hoped they would forget him quickly if he was gone.

His feet started to guide him again and, as he walked closer to a grove of thick trees, he felt the familiar pull of Takumi’s presence starting in his heart. He felt his breath hitch in his throat and he debated stopping, turning and running in the opposite direction, but it had been his intention since that morning to find Takumi, apologize to Takumi, then turn away and leave him behind. That was what was best for the other prince after all.

He ducked through the brush and tree limbs, avoiding the small branches that tugged at his shirt and pants as he walked through the woods. Finally, he heard the sharp, recognizable sound of an arrow leaving a bowstring and then the soft thud of it hitting a target.

That had to be Takumi.

It brought a small smile to his lips that Takumi was back to doing things he loved before the entire ordeal. He recalled from their shared dreams the time in which Takumi had explained to him all about his weapon, how it worked, how he had discovered it, how he got into archery, everything. It had made his heart beat a little faster and it made him smile to see the way Takumi’s eyes lit up just talking about it. He supposed he felt that way about his abilities as a mage, but Takumi’s enthusiasm had seemed to be boundless in that moment.

As he ducked through the last bit of trees, his boots quiet on the ground, he stopped short, his breath catching in his throat. Takumi was standing in the middle of a small, grassy area. There were no trees growing there, the area obviously cleared out to be something of an archery range for Takumi and Takumi alone.

Suddenly, he felt like he should retreat, duck back between the trees before he was seen. He was intruding on Takumi’s peace, probably a place he went to be alone.

But he couldn’t make himself move. His eyes were on Takumi, tracing the way his arm was pulled taut, holding an arrow on the bowstring without even a quiver of weakness in his muscles. He wasn’t wearing his typical armor; it was far too hot out for anything like that. His chest and back were nearly bare, only a small bit of cloth wrapped over one of his shoulders.

Takumi had obviously been out in the glade since morning. His skin was coated in a layer of sweat that was made visible by the small rays of sunlight that escaped through the trees. His bangs were damp in appearance, sticking to the skin of his forehead. Leo watched as his chest rose and fell slowly, one exhale, an intake of breath, his eyes still narrowed at the target in the distance, a tree that was quite a long way away.

In a flash, Takumi’s fingers freed the arrow from his hold, his chest falling as he breathed out with the release of the projectile. Leo didn’t even have to look to the tree in the distance to know that Takumi had hit his mark, but he could still see no approval reflected in Takumi’s eyes, no pride nor satisfaction. He knew how much Takumi loved archery, and to see him so apathetic towards it troubled his heart even further.

“Did you need something, Prince Leo?” Takumi’s voice finally came as the other prince turned towards him, a bored expression on his face, but Leo could tell he was trying to disguise something underneath. Discomfort that Leo was there with him in a place he called his own? Maybe.

Before he could answer, Takumi was turning away again, striding towards where he had left a box of food that could only be his lunch. He watched the other prince pick up a towel from the ground, starting to wipe the sweat from his chest and arms.

In the past, Takumi had been more muscled than Leo was. Even under the layers of cloth armor he wore, Leo knew the other prince had to be well muscled. Of the few archers he knew in Nohr, they had impeccable upper body strength.

Now though, it became even more clear what he had done. He could tell that Takumi was thinner, thinner than he should be, so much of his muscle mass lost just wasting away in bed for weeks and weeks. He had made Takumi physically weak, a shell of the stubborn boy he had met so briefly during the war. He had made him small, taken away his strength and fire only to replace it with frailty.

That realization ached deep in his heart. Even if Takumi was back to his training, it was clear he was just trying to get a bow to work for him again, and not even the sacred weapon he was so proud of being able to use.

He cleared his throat and forced himself to avert his eyes, knowing he had been staring at Takumi in both appreciativeness and then shock at what he realized he had done to him. Even in the openness of the woods, he owned Takumi some privacy, some respect, so he stared down at his boots and let the other prince clean himself up.

“I didn’t anticipate finding anyone else out here,” he murmured, letting the lie slip off his tongue easily. He had effectively followed the pull of Takumi’s existence to find him, but the other boy couldn’t know that, “I was just wandering. I have never truly experienced Hoshido aside from- well, from having to invade it…” He trailed off quietly, scuffing at the ground with the toe of his boot. The war was obviously a sensitive topic with discussed with any Hoshidan, but bringing it up in front of Takumi probably wasn’t the wisest option.

From what he had seen at dinner the night before, Prince Ryoma seemed to be the best at forcing away his feelings of resentment over the way. Though their Father had been corrupted, they had still acted like they were following him. They had still marched into Hoshido, cut down soldiers and royals alike, forced them to submit to the possibility of a Nohrian rule over their lands. Leo could sympathize with the idea of it, the sheer humiliation of having weapons taken away and then being forced to surrender in the face of an unbeatable enemy. Takumi had nearly died for the war, as had Prince Ryoma, Princess Hinoka, Princess Sakura, and all their retainers along with countless Hoshidan soldiers. At least Corrin had tried to get the Nohrian army to spare as many as they could, but that didn’t take away from the fact that Hoshido has lost.

“I could say the same,” Takumi said then, and Leo watched as he swiped the towel at his neck once more before tossing it back to the ground, “I usually don’t anticipate people finding this place. Truthfully, only Ryoma knows where it is…” The implication was strong in his words. Leo wasn’t supposed to be there, and maybe he didn’t mean that he wanted him to leave, but the notion of it still stung, even if Takumi would never know that it did.

“I apologize then,” Leo said quietly, forcing himself to step back, starting to turn towards the way he came through the brush, “I didn’t intend to intrude on your privacy.” Truly, he would never want to intentionally make Takumi uncomfortable. That was the opposite of his intentions. He just wanted to apologize, beg for Takumi’s forgiveness and hope it was granted to him in return.

“It’s fine!” Takumi called to him quickly before he could turn away fully to leave. He turned back to see Takumi looking rather flustered, a light flush on his cheeks that Leo couldn’t tell if it was from shyness or the heat of the day around them.

“If you’re certain,” Leo frowned, keeping his words light, open for argument just in case Takumi changed his mind.

“I’m sure,” Takumi nodded, “I wouldn’t want to be unhospitable. You and your siblings are our guests.”

“As true as that is,” Leo said, turning and walking closer to the other prince despite what he knew was his better judgment, “I know personally the nuisance of having someone invading my personal space. Usually, that someone is one or both of my retainers,” he huffed, rolling his eyes as he thought about the numerous times Niles or Odin or both of them had barged into his quarters or the library when he was trying to read alone. It was a nuisance, but he had come to expect it from them. He stopped walking a foot or so from Takumi, blinking at him before he opened his mouth to ask what had been on his mind for a while, “If you don’t mind my inquiry, where is your weapon? The one you used in the war?”

Leo saw the way Takumi’s lips parted at first, but no words came out, his amber eyes wide at the question at hand. He hoped he hadn’t overstepped and asked something that was too personal, too close to what had happened to him.

“My- my Fujin Yumi,” Takumi said slowly, and Leo watched his throat bob slowly before he spoke again, “I find myself unable to use it in my current state. I- I was incapacitated for sometime after the war, perhaps Corrin told you, and I- I can’t… I just can’t use it right now.” Takumi trailed off quietly and ducked his head, but Leo caught the indignity in his eyes before he could hide his face. It hurt to see that shame in Takumi’s eyes, to see how he was suffering not being able to use the weapon that had made him so proud and strong in the past.

“That’s troublesome,” Leo finally said after a long moment of silence between the two of them. He took a deep breath before he spoke, readying himself because he was going to apologize. That was what he had come to the woods to do, but he had to lead into it the right way, especially if Takumi wasn’t completely sure what had happened to him, “Perhaps it was something I did.”

“Wh-what?” Takumi choked out, his eyes whipping back up to Leo’s face, wide and more _frightened_ than questioning, “H-how could _you_ be related?”

“Well,” Leo murmured, clearing his throat and looking down and to the side before he dared meet Takumi’s gaze again, “I was the one who struck you down, if you recall.”

_I was the one who hurt you._

_I was the one who broke you._

_I was the one who ruined you._

He was expecting some sort of outburst of emotion, some sort of questioning from Takumi, but none came. Instead, the other prince’s face had gone a stark white, and the bit of pink left in his cheeks completely flooded away by horror.

_No._

_No, what have I-_

Takumi let out a strangled gasp then, his body doubling over as he grasped violently as his head, shaky, hurried breaths leaving his body.

_What have I done?_

“Prince Takumi?” Leo whispered, stepping closer tentatively, dread and fear filling his entire body, “Can you hear me? What’s… What’s wrong?” The other prince didn’t respond, suddenly letting out a shrill whimper, shaking his head against whatever he was seeing in front of his glazed eyes. Leo’s blood ran cold then, turning to piercing ice in his veins. Whatever he had said, Takumi obviously hadn’t remembered from his possession, and now? Now he was forcing him to relive it.

He felt sick. He wanted to empty his churning stomach onto the ground, but Takumi needed him then even as vile as the scene was in front of him.

_I did this._

He took a hesitant step forward.

_I ruined him._

“Prince Takumi!” Leo called louder the next time. He watched in horror as the other prince started to fall, and he rushed close to Takumi to try and catch his fall as his knees hit the ground, still caught in whatever trance the recollection had put him in, “Prince Takumi!” He shouted it, falling to his own knees in front of Takumi and gripping his forearms tightly in his hands, shaking him just a bit.

“Takumi!” He yelled the name of the boy he loved, loud and clear in the suddenly silent woods. He could see the light flood back into Takumi’s eyes then, finally breaking through whatever had been flashing through his head. He saw tears rolling from Takumi’s eyes, falling from his deathly pale cheeks as he gasped and panted for air, clutching at his head.

What could he do? Takumi was crying, whimpering between his desperate gasps for air. His face was so pale, his cheeks and lips completely devoid of color, of life. Leo hadn’t seen him this pale since… since he was laying in his bed, his sisters and brothers crying at his bedside, begging for him to come back to life.

He couldn’t bear to see that again. He could barely stand to look then, but now with the love he held in his heart, he definitely couldn’t just do nothing.

“Takumi,” Leo breathed quickly, quietly to not startle Takumi any further. His heart was pounding and he wondered if it would give out, just stop and leave him to die there in the woods holding onto Takumi. He realized then that his entire body was pulsating with a deep pain, and he knew Takumi was feeling it too, “Takumi, h-hey… Are you- are you alright? What happened? Can you speak? Come on, just breathe, okay? You’re safe…”

The words flowed from his mouth before he could help himself. He was desperate to make Takumi feel better, to take all his anguish and keep it in his own heart so Takumi wouldn’t have to feel it.

Hesitantly, he pulled Takumi forwarded and the boy fell into him easily, which shocked him at the complete lack of resistance in the movement. Takumi was pressed against him then and he threw all his inhibitions to the wind as he wrapped his arms around the other boy, cradling his head against his own shoulder. He placed his other hand on Takumi’s back, feeling how cold his skin was under his palm. Before he could help himself, he let his fingers press into Takumi’s skin, stroking his back soothingly, anything to help him calm down again and breathe easily.

Warm wetness soaked through the fabric of his shirt at his shoulder.

Takumi’s tears.

Takumi was still crying, quiet whimpers leaving his throat as he still took shaky breaths. Nevertheless, Leo didn’t relent for a second. He held him close like he had wanted to for so long. All he had wanted for weeks was to get to hold Takumi, to help him ease out of the pain his possession had caused him, but he had broken his promise. He hadn’t been there then, but he was with Takumi now, and this instant was no less his fault than the prior situation. He cradled Takumi and opened his entire body to the other prince as a place of solace, a place he could recover and cry without fear of being pushed away or judged.

He owned him that much.

He had made Takumi that upset, that panicked and afraid.

This was all he could do to try and make things right, but he knew it would never be enough.

“I-I’m okay,” Takumi finally said, his words hoarse and choked out against Leo’s shoulder, “I’m- I’m sor-”

“Don’t apologize,” Leo said quickly, stroking a hand through Takumi’s hair tenderly. He knew he truly wouldn’t be able to live with himself if Takumi was the one apologizing, “It was my fault. I hadn’t realized you were missing that part of your recollection of the experience. I’m sorry to have put that memory back in your mind. It- You were probably better off without it, seeing how you reacted.” That apology was only the beginning. There was still so much more he had to beg forgiveness for, and some things he couldn’t even mention.

“You saved me,” Takumi whispered, his voice cracking and broken, “Th-thank you.” He picked his head up then, sniffling as he wiped at his cheeks before blinking up at Leo with such gratitude in his glassy eyes.

Takumi was so wrong. He hadn’t saved him. He had destroyed him.

But he couldn’t tell him that, especially not with how Takumi had been crying before, how his voice was already so small and broken. The gratitude in his eyes couldn’t be real. It didn’t even come close enough to penetrate Leo’s damaged soul, but he could placate him. He could and would lie just to keep the thankful light in Takumi’s eyes.

“There’s no need to thank me,” Leo soothed softly, a genuine smile coming over his lips, his voice tender, “I would do anything for-”

_For you._

_I would do anything for you._

_I love you._

He couldn’t say that though. Even if he wanted to. Even if he wanted to spill his heart, shed his own tears, cry into Takumi’s shoulder as the other prince had done, he couldn’t.

It would hurt to lie, to force himself to deny the truth to Takumi yet again, to claim against the feelings he held inside of him, but it was what was necessary.

“-f-for um… For Corrin,” he finished lamely, swallowing around the lump in his throat.

And then Takumi was looking away, wrenching himself away from Leo’s arms forcefully, mumbling that he had to get back to the castle.

But what had he expected to happen? That Takumi would do anything other than pull himself away, acknowledging that the moment, whatever it had been, was over?

Takumi’s behavior was off though, too hasty and forceful, as if he had expected something different to happen after all.

But that was impossible.

He watched frozen as Takumi staggered to gathering up his belongings, clearly not fully recovered from the episode he went through in Leo’s arms but obviously trying to forget it happened. Then he was leaving, without even a look back.

“Takumi!” He called after him at the last second, but it was too late. Takumi wouldn’t look back, already too gone, too finished with whatever the moment had been.

He stared down at his hands, his skin still tingling from when it had been pressed against Takumi’s own skin.

How could he have messed up so badly again? Fate had set everything up for him so perfectly: Takumi alone in the woods, the easy conversation, the chance to apologize flat out, but he had ruined it. His second chance had been when Takumi was physically in his arms, and he could still feel how the fabric of his tunic at his shoulder was damp from tears. Takumi had been crying into his shoulder and he hadn’t done enough.

He could’ve told him that he loved him then.

He should’ve held him tighter, stronger, if only to show him that he wasn’t alone.

Instead he had shut him out, wrongly used Corrin as a scapegoat for his own emotions, and then watched him walk away.

“Damn it,” he whispered into the natural quiet of the glade, pressing his face into his palms, “Damn it!” He yelled it out, his frustration getting the better of him. He heard several birds fly off from the trees in alarm, but at least they weren’t Nohrian maids who could chatter about his shameless lack of control to others.

He hated his own cowardice, his own inability to ever strive for something he truly wanted in life. His Father had imprinted that nature into him and he hated it.

Should he ever have a child, he could at least vow to never wrongly impact that child as his Father did to him.  

Eventually, he rose to his feet in the woods, letting a quiet sigh leave his throat. He hoped he could find his way back to the castle without getting lost. After all, it was Takumi’s presence that had led him to the place to begin with. Now Takumi was gone and he had nothing to grasp onto but the weakness of the invisible strands that connected their souls.

He eventually managed to make his way back to the castle, dripping with sweat from the late afternoon sun by the time he got back. He was exhausted, and he just wanted to fall into the silken, Hoshidan sheets and sleep until the coronation was over and he could go home, leaving Hoshido in the past.

As much as it hurt to think about leaving Takumi behind, he knew it was the best course of action if he wanted to find a way to forget, to move on and become somewhat whole again.

He was heading for his guest quarters, managing to recognize some landmarks that led him there in the identical halls of Castle Shirasagi, when he was brought to a halt by the figure of someone at the end of the hall.

Someone he rather not talk to now nor ever at that.

The future king of Hoshido.

Prince Ryoma was the patriarch of Hoshido’s royal family, the future king with whom he and Xander would have to maintain diplomacy with for years and years, the brother of the boy he adored. There was no was he could speak to him on any of those topics right now, especially not the last, with his emotions torn and frayed by what had happened in the woods.

Prince Ryoma was speaking quietly to someone, likely a servant, before he dismissed them and looked up, meeting Leo’s gaze from down the hall. If he turned and went quickly in the other direction, it would seem far too suspicious. He supposed he could just walk straight past Prince Ryoma, ignoring him all together, but Hoshido’s high prince was watching him with a stern expression he doubted he would be escaping easily.

“Prince Leo,” Hoshido’s future king called to him, tucking his hands in the long sleeves of his robe, his bare feet coming slowly towards Leo in the hall.

He had always thought Prince Ryoma was a bit terrifying in appearance during the war. The Hoshidan armor he wore was nothing like anything that existed in Nohr after all, and his sword was as powerful as Xander’s Siegfried.

Without his armor, he looked a little less intimidating, dressed in a rather plain Hoshidan style robe, his hair messily pushed back from his face and hanging free down his back. It was obvious to Leo that Takumi paid far better attention to his hair. Takumi’s hair was sleek and long, mostly even in length and always neatly combed then tied up. Clearly Ryoma didn’t share the same sense of pride in his hair that his little brother did.

They did look facially alike to an extent, though Prince Ryoma’s features were more defined, more of a likeness to the late King Sumeragi that Leo had only ever seen in portraits. Takumi looked slightly like his father, but Prince Ryoma was the spitting image.

He tried to make himself look more presentable as Ryoma walked up to him, smoothing out his tunic. It was rumpled where Takumi had clung to the fabric in the wake of his onslaught of grief, but Ryoma didn’t have to know that.

“Prince Ryoma,” he regarded him with a short nod, “Is there anything I can do for you?” he asked awkwardly, shifting his weight from one foot to the other as he waited for Prince Ryoma to answer, feeling heavily studied until the cool, grey gaze of Hoshido’s high prince.

“Actually, there is,” Prince Ryoma frowned, “Takumi returned from an outing today quite upset, and he mentioned that you had been there with him. Is this true?” He raised and eyebrow and Leo felt his breath hitch in his throat. If Xander was protective over Camilla, Corrin, Elise, and even him, then Prince Ryoma would be no different, fiercely defensive of his younger siblings.

The only way Prince Ryoma could know about what occurred in the woods was if he had run into Takumi, and Leo knew what Takumi had looked like when he had left him in the forest, his eye red-rimmed with tears, his skin pale and his balance off from the sheer force of the memories Leo had accidentally placed back into his head. He didn’t know how much of that had faded by the time Takumi returned to be encountered by Prince Ryoma, and he didn’t know how much Takumi had even told his brother about what had happened.

“I- yes, it’s true,” Leo said eventually, “It was purely a coincidence that I encountered Prince Takumi in the woods. It was not my intention to seek him out.”

“Is that so?” Prince Ryoma hummed slowly, his eyes remaining stony as he gazed down at him, “Pray tell then, what compelled you to remind my little brother than he was meant to die in Nohr’s attempted conquest?”

“What?” Leo gasped out before he could stop himself. Was Takumi truly contemplating the fact that he was supposed to die? Had he then realized that Leo had almost killed him?

He still hadn’t apologized.

He needed to apologize before it got worse.

“N-no, Prince Ryoma, I- I merely wished to apologize to him,” he tried to explain, “And I didn’t realize my words would spark something he hadn’t yet realized in his recollection for that day.”

“Apologize?” Prince Ryoma questioned, his hard gaze finally softening to allow confusion in, “For what do you have to apologize for?”

“For… For _everything_ ,” Leo sighed softly, “Because I- I promised Corrin that I could save him, or at least try to, and then Takumi had to spend so long asleep, worrying you and your other siblings, and Corrin as well. Upon awakening, Takumi he- he was so hurt and I… Prince Ryoma, that was _my_ fault,” he whispered, swallowing as he stared down at his shoes, “I suppose I should apologize to you at well then, for what I put you and your entire family through.”

He hadn’t even realized it until that moment. He had changed the entire dynamic of the Hoshidan royal family, forced them to think as a unit of three rather than of four. He would have hated to have Corrin taken from his own family, and he could only imagine what Prince Ryoma and his sisters felt for weeks.

“Xander is certainly right about you, Prince Leo,” Prince Ryoma suddenly laughed, “You have a precocious talent of accepting blame upon yourself where it doesn’t belong.”

“I-I’m sorry?” Leo asked out, looking up at Prince Ryoma in shock, taking in the soft smile on the high prince’s lips rather than the frown that had been there before.

“Not everything that goes wrong in the world is your fault, Prince Leo,” Prince Ryoma said softly, “You remind me quite a bit of Takumi in that respect. He is the same way, and adamant about never changing at that,” he huffed out a laugh, “If anyone should be apologizing here,” he sighed, his face growing sad, “It’s me. Takumi is my little brother, and I should have paid more attention to him. I should have cared more for his wellbeing during the war, but I was selfish and headstrong, committed to the glory of Hoshido above all else, and I nearly lost him and my own life in the process. Truly, you’re the reason both of us are still here, Prince Leo. I should be thanking you for that, and I am. Humbly, I implore you to accept my utmost gratitude for saving both my life and Takumi’s for we would not be here right now without you.”

Prince Ryoma’s head dipped low then, a bow to Leo, a prince from another kingdom who was beneath him. All he could do was stand there in shock, blinking as Prince Ryoma rose from his stance, a smile on his lips.

“I don’t,” Leo started, “I don’t think I deserve your appreciation,” he whispered, “What I did- I- what I did to Takumi is-”

“You brought him back to me, to my sisters and I,” Prince Ryoma said gently before he could accidentally let loose what he had been holding inside for so long, cutting him off in the same way Xander tended to, and the future king’s hand was sudden laying on his shoulder, squeezing gently, “I can tell that you are quite fond of my little brother, Prince Leo, and if making an apology to him will help you on the path towards becoming… friends with him, then so be it. I believe he could do well having a companion like you. Corrin tells me that you’re very much alike after all.” Prince Ryoma’s hand squeezed his shoulder once more before it fell away and he smiled down at him, “I hope you have a good night, Prince Leo.” With that, Prince Ryoma was walking off down the hall, his footsteps quiet against the wooden floors.

Leo was left standing in the center of the empty hall, his mind buzzing with too many thoughts, filled with all the words Prince Ryoma had said to him and the knowing glint in his eyes when he had recommended that he and Takumi become friends.

He had thanked him, sincerely at that. The future king of Hoshido had bowed to Leo and thanked him for his life and for Takumi’s life.

If it was Prince Ryoma, he couldn’t quite convince his defying mind that he wasn’t worthy of the gratitude. Combined with Princess Sakura’s profession of thanks, he didn’t know what to believe anymore.

By the time he found his room and was preparing for a bath, he had decided.

The next time he saw Takumi, he would tell him everything. Even if the other boy hated him, even if it brought the might of Hoshido down on Nohr, he couldn’t keep it inside anymore.

He would tell Takumi he loved him and then accept the consequences because the other boy was worth it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think there will be just one more chapter and a v v v v fluffy epilogue different from the epilogue that was in part 1! Two fluffs for the price of one series! Wow!
> 
> Thank you so so so much for reading once again! I can never thank you all enough for even taking the time to read and leave kudos and even comments sometimes! ;u; 
> 
> I can't believe this fic has over 200 kudos and 3000 hits! That's amazing to me so thank you all so much ;u;
> 
> Stay tuned for chapter 6 in the future! >wo <333


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M BACK HELLO! I got distracted by leokumi week and my classes starting to that's why this chapter took so long! It's the last one aside from the epilogue though, so please enjoy!
> 
> Thank you for reading and I'll seeya in the end notes >wo

Takumi was elusive the days leading up until the coronation, but it wasn’t as if Leo had had much time to go searching for him. The morning after he had finally decided what to do, consequences be damned, Elise and Princess Sakura had all but dragged him out of the castle for a picnic with Princess Hinoka. Said picnic featured several hours of sitting in the hot Hoshidan sun, a prisoner of his sister and her new friends while being made to wear flower crowns that Elise spent copious amounts of time crafting.

Needless to say, when he returned to his guest quarters that late afternoon, he had been too exhausted to even try and find Takumi. He didn’t want to go to the other prince’s quarters either if there was a chance of encountering his boorish retainer. He didn’t want to force an interaction between them either. That wouldn’t make the moment right, the moment he finally told Takumi how much he adored him.

While he told himself it had to be right over and over in his head, he knew he was just stalling. The cowardice he often tried to keep buried kept rearing up inside of him, and whatever resolve he had felt after speaking to Prince Ryoma was slowly diminishing no matter how hard he tried to hold onto it.

It didn’t help that Prince Ryoma told him that Takumi was generally staying cooped up in his room, wanting to keep his strength up for the eventual coronation. Of course, the High Prince of Hoshido told him that before he and Xander were beckoned to join in on a meeting with Ryoma’s advisers that lasted all day.

The day after that, Elise had once again requisitioned him to escort her and Princess Sakura to the town’s square so they could explore the Hoshidan shops and stalls. He tried to pay as little attention as possible because, truthfully, he wanted to experience the bustling life and sacred traditions of Hoshido with its Second High _Prince_ , not its Second High Princess.

Another virtually meaningless and exhausting day bled into night and, as he lay half asleep in the bed in his guest quarters, he wondered if finding Takumi under the cover of darkness would be appropriate. In all the admittedly interesting romance novels Niles had often slipping into the piles of books he kept for reading in Nohr, night was always a reoccurring theme, the perfect time for telling someone of true inner feelings.

No, that was silly, but it was truly Leo’s only knowledge of anything having to do with romance or confessions. He sighed quietly into the dark, turning onto his back to stare up at the ceiling in the dark. The next day would be Prince Ryoma’s coronation. It would be the perfect time to tell Takumi that he loved him.

He could tell him, kiss him, take him in his arms and dance with him at the celebration after the ceremony. They could spend all night together, and then sleep in the same bed, holding each other as Leo had been desperate to do for so long. The time in the woods hadn’t been right. Rather, that had been terrifying, an example of what he could do to Takumi with just his words alone.

That discouraged him a bit, but even if Takumi didn’t want him nor love him, he would still tell him, then return to Nohr a week later with or without requited love in his heart. He sighed once more, finally feeling the pulls of sleep washing over him, encouraging his eyes to slip shut.

Only to snap open a second later as all-encompassing fear and terror ripped through his entire body.

He sat up with a strangled gasp, grasping as his chest as his heart pounded, his skin suddenly covered in a cold sweat from the feeling alone. 

 _Takumi_. It had to be Takumi’s fear, Takumi’s terror. The other prince had told him about his nightmares before, and before he could even think it through he was throwing back the blankets, not even bothering with the slippers the Hoshidans gave him to wear as he slid open the door to his quarters and rushed down the dark halls. He didn’t quite know his way to Takumi’s room, but the pounding his his chest guided him in a sense, the feelings inside of him increasing as he neared the other prince.

He could hear frantic breathing from behind the door to Takumi’s quarters, and his fingers itched to reach and throw the door open and run to Takumi, but he stayed put. He heard the sounds of blankets and sheets moving, then Takumi’s feet on the floor, padding through his room quietly. An orange glow illuminated the inside of the room, the light visible through the opaque screens that covered the Hoshidan-style doors.

A sigh, and then the sound of blankets being moved, readjusted as Takumi no doubt got back into the bed. Then quiet. Leo swallowed and remained still, pressed to the edge of the doorframe as his racing mind tried to decide if he would enter the room.

The sound of paper being unfolded caught his attention just as he had decided to turn and walk away, to leave with the knowledge that Takumi was calming down from the dream.

A quiet gasp. Then silence.

As the silence grew so did the sorrow that was slowly encompassing his soul. Leo could feel it, swelling and getting ready to burst inside of him, making his own eyes sting at the just the fact that Takumi was in so much pain.

And then the sorrow stopped abruptly, completely quashed down as vast love flooded over their combined soul and Leo felt his body sliding to the ground next to the doorframe, landing with the quiet thump as he buried his face in his hands.

He could hear Takumi crying, _sobbing_ , but not out of fear or anger or sadness. Rather, he was crying at the realization that whatever was contained on the paper he had been looking at or reading was so overwhelming full of love that it had chased those foul emotions away entirely.

Leo breathed out a quiet gasp into his palms, feeling how his own body was trembling, slowly healing, becoming more whole again as Takumi discovered a kind of love that Leo had been wanting to show him, but it wasn’t a romantic love. He could still provide that. He could still show Takumi how much he cared for him and loved him. They still had time, and now he had even more reason to.

He sat outside Takumi’s room for a while, his hand pressed to the wood of the door, breathing in sync with the boy inside the room. He had heard Takumi sniffling, surely wiping away the tears that had fallen before he had gone back to sleep. Still, Leo stayed for a while longer just to make sure that he was sleeping peacefully.

When he finally stood and walked back to his own quarters, feeling exhausted all of a sudden, he felt more and more whole with every step.

Tomorrow he would tell Takumi that he loved him.

He fell into the bed and was too exhausted to even pull the blankets up over his body, his skin too warm with the satisfied feeling inside of his heart.

It barely felt as if he had even closed his eyes before he was being awakened by the sharp rap of knuckles against the door and the bright sunlight streaming in the windows.

“Brother? Are you awake yet?” Xander’s voice came into the room, calling for him before the door slid open. He blinked groggily, squinting at the light in the room to see Xander standing in front of him, already wearing his best clothes for the ceremony.

“Gods,” he groaned, rubbing at his eyes with the back of his hand, badly stifling a yawn into the crook of his elbow, “What time is it?”

“Past the time that you should be sleeping in, especially when Ryoma’s coronation is today,” Xander huffed, “Evidentially, the maids were unable to wake you. Stay up late last night reading again, little brother?” There was affection in his tone but Leo just huffed and rolled his eyes, forcing himself to sit up in bed.

If only he had been doing something simple and harmless like reading rather than sitting outside Takumi’s door listening to his tears and sobs all while willing him to feel better until he fell asleep. Reading was a decent excuse though, so he finally nodded as he yawned again.

“Yeah… I was reading,” he mumbled, looking away only for the glaring sunlight to beam into his eyes, making his eyes water and he had to look back at Xander.

“Well, perhaps you should get ready,” Xander laughed, reaching to ruffle his already obscene bedhead, “The maids have set out your clothes for you. I will return in half an hour to fetch you for the ceremony, alright?”

“Alright, alright, _fine_ ,” Leo groaned, frowning at Xander’s chuckle at his expression before the king left the room. Alone again, he sighed, rubbing at his eyes once more to try and clear away whatever grogginess was left.

He bathed quickly, scrubbing his skin and hair with soap before hurriedly toweling off, knowing his hair would dry quickly in the warm sunlight that was relentlessly beaming into his guest quarters.

His best ceremonial clothes were a bother as they always were the many times he had had to wear them. Before the war escalated, Father had always entertained many nobles in Windmire, inviting them for extravagant balls and parties that all his children were required to attended even as their numbers dwindled. He had had many ceremonial clothes and party attire made up for him during his life, and they all looked basically the same.

His clothes were mostly dark in color, accented by the white of the slightly ruffled collar of his dress shirt and kerchief at his neck. He put on the black pants and his boots that had been pristinely polished before sliding his arms into the shirt, buttoning it slowly to make sure he didn’t miss any of the loops. Often times, he dressed too quickly in the morning and ended up with the buttons mismatched on his shirt or his cape inside out. There was a similar cape to the one he wore into battle that he clasped at his neck after donning his jacket, letting it flow over his shoulders and halfway down his back. It was the same coloration as the cape that adorned his armor, emblazoned with a small crest of Nohr near the nape of his neck.

He brushed through his hair briefly before sliding his headband into place, arranging it correctly among his blond locks. He hoped he looked presentable enough for the coronation, but really Prince Ryoma and his family were the centerpieces of the event.

But mostly he hoped he looked presentable enough for Takumi. Maybe it was vain, but he had heard of the colorful and breath-taking nature of Hoshidan ceremonial robes and he couldn’t even imagine what Takumi would look like in them. Takumi was always beautiful no matter what, but Leo didn’t know what he would look like when made to appear beautiful to everyone. The thought of it alone stirred jealousy in his gut and he had to force the ugly feeling away.

Takumi wasn’t his, and maybe never would be his if things didn’t go the way he wanted, and he would have to accept that.

Xander came back to fetch him eventually, beckoning him down the hall towards the Hoshidan throne room. The throne room was open the outside, and while nobles and invited dignitaries were seated in front of the throne, Leo could see hundreds if not thousands of Hoshidan citizens spread throughout the entire town, yearning to hear and see the changing of an era, the crowning of a new king.

He sat with Xander, Camilla, and Elise, watching various Hoshidan nobles be ushered in as they waited for the ceremony to start.

Eventually, several of Prince Ryoma’s older advisers entered next to the throne, and after them the Hoshidan royalty filed in first Prince Ryoma, then Princess Hinoka, and then Takumi.

He stopped looking after that. He couldn’t tear his eyes away from the sight of Takumi walking into the throne room, his body draped in fine robes of a deep, navy blue, accented with silver and gold, a hint of bright red adorning the fabric that matched the ribbon holding up his hair. He looked regal and breathtaking, and Leo wished he wasn’t seated so far from him so he could move closer, feel the fabric of his robes, smell the flowery scent of soap on his skin, kiss his lips, stroke his hair.

His hair looked softer than usual, combed to perfection and tied into his usual ponytail, but there was no clasp on the lower end keeping it together. Instead the long, silvery locks swayed freely against his back with his soft footsteps, settling on his shoulders as he sat between Princess Hinoka and Princess Sakura by the throne. There were a few subtle braids twisted into his hair, tucked and pinned behind his ears to accent the entire regality of his attire.

Takumi was striking, and Leo knew then if he couldn’t have him, he would be extremely envious of the man or woman would would call him their lover one day.

The ceremony was longer than Xander’s had been, filled with several Hoshidan rites and prayers that seemed to last forever, but eventually King Ryoma rose from his knees to address the people as the newly crowned king of Hoshido. His words went over Hoshido’s recent history, the death of King Sumeragi, the death of Queen Mikoto, then the war with Nohr. He was astoundingly optimistic in most of his words, which surprised Leo, speaking of gratitude and hope rather than choosing to dwell on the horrors of the past.

And when King Ryoma spoke about Takumi, Leo watch the new King of Hoshido’s eyes meet his own, a warm and grateful look spreading over his whole face. His mind flashed back to King Ryoma thanking him several days earlier, bowing to him with such unspeakable reverence, and now he was, in one way other another, thanking him in front of the entirety of Hoshido whether the people gathered knew it or not. It was an amplified effect to how King Ryoma’s thanks days prior had made him feel and he had to look away and force himself to breathe at the sheer force of it.

_You have a precocious talent of accepting blame upon yourself where it doesn’t belong…_

_We would not be here right now without you…_

King Ryoma’s words echoed in his mind, trying to force him to believe in them fully. He figured he was half-way there; he had accepted King Ryoma’s gratitude to an extent but Takumi was different. He still had to make things right with the other prince for Takumi’s sake as well as his own no matter how difficult it would be.

“I thank you all for putting your faith in me to lead Hoshido through to a new era in our history, one filled with healing and friendship rather than war and turmoil. Thank you for your time and your support in the coming years.” King Ryoma finished his speech with a bow and Elise nudged him from his thoughts to stand and clap for the new King. When he tried to meet Takumi’s eye, the other prince only held his gaze on his older brother. Leo wouldn’t allow himself to be disheartened. There would be plenty of time later in the day to find Takumi and try to get them to a place where they could be alone again.

As the crowds started to shift to move to where a banquet was set up, Leo tried to keep his gaze on Takumi, but it was impossible for Leo to watch where he was going, stick with his siblings, and look for the Hoshidan prince all at once. Seeing as not stepping on or crashing into other dignitaries was a plus, and he would rather stay with Xander and his sisters, he allowed himself to lose sight of Takumi for the time being.

He was starving anyway after getting up too late to have anything for breakfast. He helped himself to several simple-looking Hoshidan dishes that he figured wouldn’t be too strange on his palette. He had learned from dinner a few nights earlier to stay away from squid and octopus and any sort of raw shellfish. The cold, slimy feeling of the delicacies was rather revolting, and if he never had to eat anything with that consistency again, he would be grateful.

He mostly stuck to the meats he knew, beef and chicken mostly, which were prepared with Hoshidan flavorings, but he was slowly getting used to it.

It was still unsure if he would have to maintain a palette suited for Hoshidan cuisine. If Takumi rejected him, he couldn’t imagine every willingly coming to Hoshido again. It would hurt too much, and he already knew hurt too deeply to subject himself willingly to more pain.

“Enjoying the festivities, Prince Leo?” A voice startled him and he jumped, spinning around to face Hoshido’s new king in the spot Xander had been standing before. He swallowed the bite of food in his mouth and gave a quick nod, clearing his throat before he spoke.

“King Ryoma, I am, and congratulations to you. Your speech was very well done,” he said, giving a short bow to the king.

“Come now, Prince Leo,” he laughed, “I’m sure formalities are long since expired. Your brother and I simply refer to each other by our informal names, and seeing as you do the same with Takumi, I suppose you and I are what’s left, hm? Leo?”

“I-I couldn’t possibly,” he stammered out quickly, choosing to ignore how King Ryoma had noticed his slip-up on Takumi’s name in their last conversation.

“Come now. It’s easy enough,” King Ryoma laughed, “While Nohr is now our ally, I would like to see the Nohrian royal family as friends rather than mere acquaintances. Our younger sisters seem to have gotten to know each other quite well, and I imagine as an adviser to your brother you and I will be contacting each other frequently in the future, wouldn’t you agree, Leo?”

“Fine,” Leo sighed, relenting finally, “I suppose it’s alright… _Ryoma_.”

“That’s better,” Ryoma laughed again, “Now, have you seen your brother around anywhere?”

“He was here a moment ago, but it seems he and Camilla have gone off somewhere else,” Leo sighed, knowing he would have to go to the trouble of finding his siblings now to not be standing alone, an easy target for a conversation like that of the one he was currently having.

“Well, I will continue seeking him out then,” Ryoma nodded, “In the meantime, perhaps you and my brother could spend some time together?”

“Wh-what?” Leo choked, covering it with a quick cough as he tried to decide if he had comprehended Ryoma correctly, “I’m sorry but I- I don’t think-”

Nonsense,” Ryoma smiled then, settling a hand on his shoulder, “Takumi gets quite bored as gatherings like this. When he was a child, he and Sakura used to scheme so cleverly to try and get out of attending, but mother usually got them to go in the end,” he chuckled, “And of course he had the utmost obligation to attend this event so I imagine he’s probably very weary of the whole thing. Perhaps you two could speak again, and maybe you could even give him that apology you seemed so dedicated to when we last spoke,” Ryoma squeezed his shoulder before giving him one last smile and disappearing into the crowd.

He could find Takumi; he _should_ find Takumi. Ryoma seemed intent on having him do so, probably for his own little brother’s sake and need of company.

Yet the thought of it made him want to run, to find a quiet place free of the sounds of the party in which he could catch his breath.  Before he could even think of what to do next, some Hoshidan nobles took advantage of his lack of company to engage him in conversation, and once one Hoshidan noble saw that he was being talked to, more flocked over much to his chagrin.

Nohrian dignitaries and nobles were generally scheming, conniving in their attempts at conversation and selfish in their desires from royalty. The decent nobles rarely ever attended Father’s parties, but a few more than usual had shown up for Xander’s coronation. Nevertheless, most of the women were pushy about marriage, the men devious in regards to trade and arranging marriages for their daughters. It was all incredibly exhausting.

Hoshidan nobles were surprisingly genial, more similar in nature to the Nohrians Leo found that he almost enjoyed speaking with. Most of them seemed intent on asking him about Nohr’s state of affairs with genuine curiosity and concern, thanking him for his aid in the construction of a peace treaty between their kingdoms, and asking him if he was enjoying himself at the celebration.

After a while, he supposed they sensed his discomfort and he was left alone again, a stark contrast to how most Nohrian dignitaries generally treated royalty when sensing weariness. He could only hope with the war over and Father no longer king that Nohr could become more of the nation he had always heard about a read about, a prosperous place where people often grew strong from hardship, and that made Nohr strong in return.

He found Xander in the ballroom, talking with Camilla along the wall as they watched the couples who were actually dancing. He fell into place at Xander’s side, sighing softly.

“Tired of the festivities already, little brother?” Xander laughed, “Well, parties were never quite to your liking if I remember correctly.”

“It’s not too bad,” Leo huffed indignantly, crossing his arms over his chest, “It’s just exhausting.”

“Poor thing,” Camilla pouted, “Perhaps you should find someone to dance with. That could lighten your spirits.”

“Since when have I been fond of dancing either?”

“You were always quite good at it, little brother. Perhaps you could find a nice Hoshidan who would be taken with your skills,” Camilla cooed, “I’ve seen several fair-”

“I’m truly not interested,” Leo said quickly, forcing his gaze away from his sister’s teasing smile and back to the dance floor.

And then he caught a glimpse of Takumi for the first time since the coronation and it was like everything stopped. All the chattered around him, all the people moving, the noise, the brightness of it; everything was slowed to a halt and his heart calmed when he eyes fell onto the boy he had longed to see all evening. Takumi was standing with Princess Hinoka and girl who looked seemed to be wearing Nestrian formal attire.

He wanted to go over and ask Takumi to dance with him.

He could take his hand and hold his waist, hold him to his chest and dance with him like lovers did. He could tell Takumi everything while holding the other prince close and dear in his arms, letting whispered words of affection leave his lips from where they had been bottled up for so long.

But he couldn’t because Takumi was taking _the girl’s_ hand, leading _her_ carefully to the dance floor as if she was something fragile, someone he cared about.

Leo swallowed slowly, testing to see if his heart had yet to rise to his throat. He watched as Takumi’s hand rested delicately on the girl’s narrow waist, his other hand accepting her hand into his own. He swallowed again as a new song started, played on Hoshidan instruments that had sounded foreign to his ears before but now sounded menacing, a song of his own heart break.

And Takumi moved with her, the nameless girl that Leo had already burned with hatred into his memory, their feet gliding in perfect motions as he lead her through the song.

He had been thoughtless in his infatuation; he knew that now. He had been foolish and naïve and reckless to even let himself hope to believe that Takumi would or even _could_ some day love him, or even accept him as a person.

As he felt that despairing reality start to seep over his heart, he watched as the girl Takumi was leading leaned towards the other prince, her glossy lips pursed slightly and eyes half closed and-

He couldn’t look anymore.

He didn’t want to look anymore.

But he couldn’t pull his eyes away as lips that weren’t his own grazed Takumi’s skin, kissing him not on the lips, but so close it made his blood boil nonetheless.

He couldn’t remember the last time he had been so angry, infuriated with himself, with the girl, with Takumi. No, he couldn’t be mad at Takumi. Takumi was still the one he had ruined and now he was just trying to live.

He was _jealous_ , and deeply so at that.

He was a jealous, petty fool, one who didn’t deserve Takumi as much as he wanted him. And yet he couldn’t help the rage brewing inside him at both his own stupidity and at the tact of the girl in Takumi’s arms as he stared down at the toes of his boots, trying to keep his composure in front of his siblings and whomever else could see him in the public sphere of the room.

When he dared raise his seething gaze to Takumi and the Nestrian girl again, whatever rage he had been feeling vanished in an instant at the look in Takumi’s eyes.

Takumi’s amber eyes were glazed, hollow and unseeing as they had been in the woods, as they had been when his body hadn’t been his own, his lips slack and face pale as a scene entirely different from the ballroom was likely reflected in his mind.

 _No_.

No not again. He couldn’t have done this to him, to the boy he loved, _again_.

He had poisoned Takumi with his rage, forced his mind back into that state with just the feelings he had forgotten were shared between their hearts.

And suddenly Takumi was back, his eyes clear but terrified, filling with tears as he yanked himself away from the girl and _ran_.

Leo ran after him.

He heard his name being called, Xander’s voice, then Camilla’s, but nothing mattered except Takumi. If all he could ever do for Takumi was try to fix what he himself broke, then that was his duty, his obligation to the other prince.

The air in the halls outside the ballroom was remarkably cooler than inside without the myriad moving people and brightly lit chandeliers. Leo breathed, slowly, deliberately as he scanned the hall. It was dim, and he couldn’t see nor hear anyone, but he had his heart.

He could find Takumi without a need for direction. He could find him with just the pull in his chest and the deep, sorrowful ache currently coursing through him.

“I-I’m sorry…”

He heard Takumi’s voice finally, shaky and small, accented by hurried breaths and broken sobs. His heart ached worse.

He hated Takumi’s tears

“I-I’m _sorry_ , m-mother… I-I’m so, s-so… _sorry_...”

He was closer now, closer to Takumi, to his fear and his sadness and his choked sobs.

“Takumi,” he whispered the name in shock, and sorrow, and regret when he came upon the other boy, curled up on the floor against a wall, his knees pulled to his chest and tears streaking down his face. Takumi looked up at him, stared at him with desperate, teary eyes, the amber of his irises seeming even brighter with the glaze of his tears and the glow of the dim lighting in the hall.

Even in sorrow and pain, he was beautiful, and Leo wanted all of him.

Every bit of fear. Every bit of sadness. Every bit of anger.

He wanted his light and his love, his happiness and his tenderness to share, and he wanted to banish away the bad things, the things that made Takumi wither even in the light of the world around him rather than grow strong.

Takumi deserved to grow strong, stronger than he already was, and Leo knew that couldn’t happen unless he was whole again, unless _they_ were whole again.

Before he could even think, he was dropping to his knees, pulling Takumi into his chest and arms as he had done in the woods, but this time he held him, actually held him close and tight, willing for his tears to stop, for his breaths to even out, for his whimpers to cease.

If he was the one who broke Takumi, it was his duty to fix him, the very onus that drove his entire being.

So he held him, tight and strong in his arms even though he felt like breaking too, feeling Takumi’s rapid breaths hot and wet against his skin.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he breathed before he could stop himself, the need to apologize for this, for the woods, for everything too strong for him to ignore, ““I’m so _sorry_ ,” he choked, and he heard how his voice cracked on the words, but he kept speaking anyway, for himself, for Takumi, “I keep _doing_ this to you. Forgive me. Forgive me _please_. Please _forgive me_ , Takumi!” He begged, hearing how a sob left his own throat after that.

Tears were burning in his eyes, but he couldn’t let them fall.

Not now. Not until Takumi forgave him, if he would ever forgive him.

All he could do was hold him, his eyes squeezed shut and lips pressed together to not let free his tears or his sobs. Takumi was the one hurting; he was just trying to fix it. He had no right to break down as well, not when the boy in his arms with still trembling lightly, his chest heaving for air against his own.

“I-” Takumi’s voice came then, shaky and strained, but strong beneath the tremor the panic brought on, “I- I forgive you, Leo...”

A wretched sob left his lips then, broken and cracking with sorrow against Takumi’s shoulder, and he knew his tears were falling into the fine, Hoshidan cloth of his ceremonial attire, but he couldn’t care about that in the moment. All he cared about was the utterance that had left Takumi’s lips, small but true, and loaded with so much more than the present.

Forgiveness for now.

Forgiveness for the woods.

Forgiveness for not coming for Takumi, for promising and then breaking his promise.

And forgiveness for the beginning, for the past, for destroying himself for the sake of the other prince when neither of them had wanted it at the time.

All he wanted now was to taste Takumi’s lips.

So he did, and he claimed Takumi’s mouth like he had been yearning for for days and weeks and _months_ , a kind of desperation he had never felt before that had threatened to consume his entire person. He kissed him hard, bruising with all the tenderness and love he felt for the boy in his arms, and Takumi’s was kissing him back as well with as much fervor as he had in his own body.

A sob left Takumi’s lips, cracked and barely choked out, but Leo _took_ it. He reached to cradle Takumi’s back and head, fingers threading into the hair he had wanted to stroke his fingers through for so long and he took what Takumi was giving him.

He captured every sob with his own lips, brought new sounds out of Takumi with every stroke of his tongue, felt the way Takumi was gripping him, fingers tight and curled into his clothes with a need to never let go.

_Never let me go._

_Please never let me go again_.

They separated for a second, but that alone was too much, too long of a time where he wasn’t feeling Takumi’s lips and mouth on his own, and he surged forward again. Takumi met him, yielded to him, gave to him all that he was giving to the boy in his arms, and it felt so right, the most secure he had felt since the war ended.

He kissed Takumi until the other prince was breathing normally.

He kissed Takumi until the tears on both their cheeks had dried or been swiped away by frantic, caring fingers.

He kissed Takumi until he had to pull away to breathe, only to meet him again and again until he could feel the heat in his mouth, the burn in his own lips from just tasting Takumi so many times.

When he could feel the desire inside him boiling down to a normal level again, he slowly pulled his lips from Takumi’s, breathing somewhat heavily as he lowered his head to Takumi’s shoulder, still holding him as tightly as he could, refusing to ease up his grip for even a moment. If he did, Takumi could slip away again, disappear from him, and he couldn’t have that, not again, never again.

“Why…” Takumi’s voice broke the quiet after a moment or two, his tone questioning rather than accusatory, “Why didn’t you- come for me?” he asked shakily, a tremor Leo could feel all throughout his own body, “I thought you weren’t real.”

“I’m real,” Leo murmured, forcing himself to pick up his head from Takumi’s shoulder, suddenly tired, sated and warm, content in Takumi’s arms. He rested their foreheads together, breathing out quietly as he opened his eyes slowly, his vision greeted with the sight of Takumi there before him, his lips kissed red but eyes tear-free, “I swear to you. I’m real,” he swallowed around the lump in his throat, “We’re real.”

“Then why,” Takumi begged again, and Leo hated the new quiver that entered his tone, tinged with misunderstood sadness, “Why…”

“I feel your anguish right now,” Leo whispered slowly, unsure of his words as he finally started to speak, to say what he had wanted to stay to Takumi for so long, to confess his actions. He reached out, pressing a hand to Takumi’s chest, feeling his heartbeat thumping steadily under his fingers, “I feel your sadness in my own chest. I feel everything about you in my heart. I felt it when you finally awoke after so long. I feel it every time you cry. I know when you’re scared or when you feel lost. I thought my heart would give out when we were in the woods and I- I _made_ you that way. I couldn’t believe that I had made you react like that. I couldn’t get through to you, I couldn’t break you out of whatever horrors were in front of your eyes. I didn’t know how I could talk to you if when I did you could react like that. And then I did it _again_ just by feeling jealous at you dancing with that- _that girl_. That was- it was terrifying to know that just by feeling a certain way I could ruin you, another fear to put on top of everything else,” he cut himself off before he could say more, before he could allow the tears to start again.

Not again.

No more tears.

“You were scared?” Takumi asked quietly. “What were you scared of?”

_You._

_Your family._

_The entire nation of Hoshido._

_My siblings._

_My Father._

_Myself._

“ _Everything_ ,” Leo finally managed in one breath, closing his eyes to allow himself some solace in the dark before he opened them again, meeting Takumi’s gaze, “Everything I did. I had- I had essentially brought you back to life. I had connected our hearts unintentionally, and when I finally realized that I- I was _horrified_ with myself.”

“You saved me though. You _saved_ me,” Takumi urged, as if it was obvious, but it wasn’t. He was still naïve. He hadn’t saved him.

“I violated you,” he finally decided was the right word to use, “I took your will and I desecrated it. I stole your _freedom_ ,” he said firmly, refusing to allow any tremble in his voice take away from the severity of his words, “I stole your will to choose to live or die and unknowingly replaced it with my own decisions. I carved away parts of you that I didn’t intend on taking, and I felt awful for that. I still feel like I- as if I did something so terribly wrong.”

“But you didn’t,” Takumi argued then, and Leo watched and then felt as he reached up to stroke his cheek, slow yet earnest, gentle, tender, “I’m here now.”

“What if you didn’t want to be?” Leo asked, his voice hoarse as he tried to ignore the caring touch of Takumi’s palm, “What if you had wanted to die? What if you had been too spent from whatever was eating away at you to live any longer and I just put your through excruciating pain by keeping you here? What if you had accepted peace?”

“I hadn’t,” Takumi said fiercely, a kind of strength to his voice that Leo hadn’t truly expected out of him in that moment and he could only stare, imploring Takumi tot speak more, “I was fighting. I was- I was _angry_. I was so angry that I had been- taken over by something. I wanted to live. I wanted to be with my family again. And if I had died, I would have died as myself because of you. Don’t you _see_?”

“See what?” Leo sighed, a quiet sound that was a reflection of the only spirit he had left, the only thing that remained after offering his soul to Takumi for his rage.

“You _saved_ me, Leo.”

And somehow, with everything out in the open, with his entire heart and mind empty and bare, it was _simple_.

So simple, and Takumi was smiling up at him, a soft, compassionate expression that filled his entire body with warmth.

He blinked slowly at the look on Takumi’s face, his kind eyes and even kinder expression, his humble words and honest truth. He wanted to say something, but he had nothing left.

He kissed him again, softer this time because he wanted and needed to memorize the shape and taste and warmth of his lips. Takumi was receptive too, soft and warm to the touch. He was beautiful and bright, and holding him truly in the glow of their love was like he had clasped a star in his hands from a rare cloudless night in Nohr, and he would never willingly let it go.

“I never want to see you holding someone else again,” Leo said into the dim light around them when their lips finally separated, “I feel everything you feel deep in my heart. And when you’re not with me, it hurts,” he breathed, his fingers idly stroking along the strong line of Takumi’s jaw.

“You should have noticed that I didn’t want to be with that girl then,” Takumi rolled his eyes, smiling when he gave him a disgruntled point, “Hinoka made me as some sort of- joke, I guess,” the other prince shrugged, “If you had only listened to your heart you would have felt my complete lack of enjoyment.”

“That’s true,” Leo laughed then in defeat, smiling in the low light in admittance, “I think you should make it up to me though.”

“How so?” Takumi smiled again, leaning closer to him.

“I think you should dance with me instead,” Leo whispered before he could help himself, his mind desperate for what he had longed for earlier, “I would eagerly take you in my arms and dance with you as other lovers do on the floor. I would hold you against my chest, feel your heart beating under my hands, and I wouldn’t relent my hold on you to anyone who asked for your hand.” He didn’t quiet know where the words came from, but Takumi didn’t seem put off at all.

“Possessive, aren’t you?” Takumi smirked, “You weren’t like this when we were- getting to know each other.”

“We were alone then,” Leo countered easily, “Alone in our own heads in a world of dreams,” he sighed out, tucking a strand of Takumi’s hair behind his ear, “You were all I could think about for days and weeks on end. Camilla,” he huffed out a laugh, “-kept trying to find out who I seemed so smitten with, and I think Corrin was starting to get suspicious with how often I asked her for your status. Now though… Now we’re here, and I have to show the world that you’re mine as I am yours, and I will never let you go.”

“That sounds fair,” Takumi laughed, and the sound of it flood Leo’s entire body with happiness, “I wouldn’t mind that at all. I’d love to be yours.” Takumi was quiet for a moment, his kissed-red bottom lip between his teeth before he looked up again, “I love you, Leo.”

It felt like he had been waiting to hear those words spoken out loud from Takumi’s mouth forever, and the feeling of extreme delight or shock never came, only calm bliss, a sweet, slow feeling that encapsulated his entire being.

Love.

“And I love you, Takumi,” he murmured after, “I suppose what they say is true then.”

What’s that?”

“Distance truly does make the heart grow fonder,” he smiled, leaning forward press a soft kiss to Takumi’s sweet lips, “I have grown to love you even more in our time apart. I have yearned for you.” He watched as Takumi’s cheeks flushed a bit red, and he couldn’t help but feel the heated skin, stroking his thumb slowly over the pink glow.

“I suppose I owe you a dance then?” Takumi spoke up, coughing slightly at the embarrassment still evident on his cheeks, clearly trying to ignore the flush, “We should go.”

“Of course,” Leo nodded, suddenly giddy with the idea of holding Takumi in front of everyone. He withdrew his arms from around the other prince slowly standing up on tense legs before he reached, clasping Takumi’s hand and pulling him to his feet, watching as his robes swaying around him, falling easily back into place. He curled his fingers into Takumi’s own, giving him a small, private smile as they started to walk down the hall, back to the party, back to their families.

But together this time.

The ballroom was still light and alive with people and music, as if they had never left, but it was different this time. Leo greeted the light, welcomed it along with the boy at his side who seemed to shine so brightly for him.

He stepped onto the dance floor, offering Takumi his hand. He settled his free hand on Takumi’s waist, holding him tightly to his chest, close as lovers did. He could see the light mirrored in Takumi’s eyes, refracting and reflecting golden-amber flecks and rays that made up the color Leo loved so much.

He held him close, spun him around, danced with him slowly.

He whispered quietly words of poetry in his ear, for only Takumi to hear, and he felt alive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IT'S DONE ADIOS BYE except for the epilogue but that's all cute fluff and stuff uwu
> 
> jk i'm not done lol I have another fic planned a part 3 leo's pov they will get married and be happy forever I just really need them to be happy in the future okay? okay. 
> 
> Since this is technically the last story chapter, I would love it if any of you could tell me what you thought of these series so far as a whole? The characterization, the different POVs in part 1 and part 2, the interactions with other side characters, anything!!! Constructive criticism means the world to me! <3
> 
> But if you can't or don't want to offer that, having you read to the end of this is truly meaningful to me nonetheless <3 Every comment, kudos left, or view to this fic and the entire series means so much to me! 
> 
> Thank you for your support and I'll seeya soon with the epilogue and /wheezes.... part 3


	7. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HELLO IT ME I'M BACK
> 
> Really sorry this took so long ;A; I had a final and another exam I had to study a lot for so everything went on the back burner aside for calculus and medical terminology //A\\\ BUT I'M BACK and I bring tidings in the form of 10k of fluffy epilogue?? :3c Think of it as an apology for the 40k of pain that preceded this ;u;
> 
> ENJOY! See ya in the end notes........ for the last time (cries) 3

It was the end of Hoshidan autumn and well into Nohrian winter by the time Ryoma's and Xander’s advisers finally consented to allowing Takumi to visit Nohr, which had been a long time coming outside of all the political dealings of the arrangement. 

The wait had been agonizing for Leo, and he knew from Takumi's frequent letters that he also felt the longing that came with being apart. Leo recalled his travel to Hoshido with fondness, seeing Takumi in his festival robes, exploring Hoshido's traditions with him, and sliding a simple golden band around his finger, a promise, a symbol of their love for years to come, or until he would replace that ring with a different one, one he could match on his own finger.

Frankly, he was desperate to marry Takumi even though they had only finally confessed their feelings to each other at Ryoma’s coronation, but they had been connected for longer than that, and the love Leo could feel in his heart and mind and soul every time he thought about the Hoshidan Prince was enough to be certain that he _needed_ to marry Takumi.

Whenever Takumi wanted to of course. He wouldn’t push him. He wouldn’t test the boundaries of their relationship because he truly was content as things were, but he would rather Takumi be his in a way that everyone knew about, not just their siblings. Both Ryoma’s and Xander’s advisers knew of their relationship and had decided to keep it from the public for the time being until relations between the two nations’ people were more sound. Leo didn’t mind, but not having Takumi with him due to the workings of politics was frustrating to no end.

He hadn't seen the Hoshidan Prince he loved so much for over two months, and by the time Ryoma's advisers and Xander's advisers reached an agreement on sending Takumi to Nohr, the ground was covered in heavy snow, buildings and nature coated in frost, and the sun a pathetic, pale speck of light when it rarely appeared in the sky. 

The state of Nohr's weather didn't matter in the slightest when he received a letter three pages in length from Takumi confirming he would be coming to Nohr in five days and staying for the length of a month. Takumi's letters had become more and more affectionate the more they wrote to each other, and this letter was no different, containing obvious excitement from the other prince.

 

_Dear Leo,_

_As always, I hope this letter finds you in good health and high spirits._

_I miss you terribly…_

Leo huffed out a quiet laugh, rolling his eyes at the first line of the letter, a smile coming to his lips. Takumi started every letter almost the same, a wish for his wellbeing and a proclamation of longing. It was endearing, and Leo had come to expect it considering he started his letters to Takumi in nearly the exact same fashion.

 

_I’m quite pleased as I write to you today because Ryoma’s advisers have relented and granted my request to come to Nohr as you and Xander have been talking about for some time. I am rather excited considering the only time I have been on Nohrian soil was during the war, and I never came close to the capitol. I have heard stories my entire life of the descriptions of where you live, and I cannot wait to experience it for myself with you to guide me._

_I have also read that winter starts earlier in Nohr and lasts far longer than it does in Hoshido, and you get a lot more snow than we do. I hope there will be a lot of snow by the time I get there! I read in a book once about how in Nohr special shoes are crafted with blades of metal on the bottom so that people may move with ease on ice. It sounds fascinating and I would love to try it myself, but if it is hard to come by the special shoes or there is not good enough ice to use them on, I will be happy just seeing the snow._

_In Hoshido, it only snows copiously in the mountains. Mostly, the castle and the area around it get layers of frost every night and into the morning. Sometimes when I go out early to hunt with Setsuna, Oboro, and Hinata, every blade of grass and every tree branch is covered in frost. As the sun comes up over the horizon, the frost glitters against the rays of light before it melts away. It is truly beautiful, Leo, and maybe one day you can come to Hoshido in the winter and experience it with me. I want to see everything with you, everything beautiful the world has to offer._

_I know in Nohr that a lot of trees don’t loose their leaves in the winter. I have heard that the snow builds up on the trees and the branches hold it up, and then they look completely covered in white with only a bit of green still showing through. I want to see everything Nohr has in the wintertime, and I would not protest to returning in the spring, nor in the summer, nor in the fall as long as you’re there with me._

_Mostly, I am anticipating being with you again, Leo. It seems far longer than a few months since the summer, and every time I look down at the ring you gave me, I long to be in your arms again. I will see you in a few days though so there is no need to write back to me, seeing as by the time your letter reaches Hoshido I will likely be at your side once more. You can say everything you want to say to me with your own voice, and I long to hear it._

_I hope we can go ice skating and see snow and just be together for the next month without the weight of politics and royal duties on our shoulders. Then again, I wouldn’t quite mind the work as long as you were with me. Everything becomes less stressful and tiresome when you’re there, Leo._

_Please take care of yourself in the coming days. I don’t want you to catch a cold before I arrive, but if you do I’d be happy to take care of you until you’re better nonetheless._

_With love,_

_Takumi_

 

Leo set the papers covered in Takumi’s fine script onto the table in front of him, unable to help the smile on his lips as he traced the lines that made up the other prince’s name signed into the paper. Getting a letter from Takumi was sure to keep him relatively happy for an entire day, a fact his siblings had picked up on too quickly and the teasing comments hadn’t ceased since.

Still, he knew he had work to do after reading Takumi’s letter. It wasn’t work that regarded politics or the state of the kingdom, but rather work that would be for the joy contained within his own heart and Takumi’s in turn.

He easily found a book filled with freezing and ice related spells before he dressed warmly, heading out into the cold to find the perfect spot to create an area where he could teach Takumi how to skate. There was a decently sized pond besides a field layered in several feet of snow near the castle and he decided that would be the best spot. It was secluded, hidden from view aside from a small window in one of the castle’s east towers that hardly anyone other than the maids even knew about.

It wasn’t that they had to be alone necessarily, but Leo preferred to spend as much time with Takumi outside the gaze of anyone else, especially the watchful eyes of their siblings.

He reached the pond easily, testing the edge of it to find that it was frozen solid, but the depth of the water towards the center left darkness still visible underneath the ice. Freezing the pond was no big deal, but making it smooth and pristine enough to skate upon would take some time. There was still five days until Takumi would be in Nohr. That was certainly enough time to make just one thing perfect for the other prince, something he wanted to do, something they could do together.

His heart soared just thinking of having Takumi with him again and, as he trudged back to the castle through the snow, the cold couldn’t seem to penetrate his clothes and he felt warm.

* * *

 

The five days leading up until Takumi’s arrival were filled mostly with work with Xander’s advisers, tea time with Elise, and preparing the pond so it would eventually be able to bear the force of ice skating. Leo had gone to town and purchased a pair of ice skates that he hoped would fit Takumi. The other boy was a bit smaller in stature than him so he could gauge what would fit him fairly well, but if the skates didn’t fit, he was sure Takumi could fit into a pair of his own.

Nevertheless, Leo knew he wouldn’t relent on helping Takumi’s wishes come true. If he wanted to experience everything Nohr had, he would do his best to show it to him.

The day of Takumi’s arrival, Leo spent most of the morning pacing, his eyes on the cloudy horizon outside the windows of Xander’s office.

“Pacing isn’t going to make Prince Takumi arrive any sooner,” Xander sighed at him from his desk where they were meant to be going through some policies, “Is something amiss, Leo?”

“It looks like it may storm,” Leo sighed in return, forcing himself to sit across from Xander, “I don’t want there to be trouble for Takumi’s carriage with the weather.” He knew how Nohrian storms could be. They came quickly, hit hard with snow and wind, and persisted through the night. He wouldn’t want Takumi to be caught up in something like that, especially when he had never been to Nohr in the past.

“I’m sure it will be fine,” Xander said with a soft smile, setting his pen down so he could stretch his arms over his head, running his fingers through his blond curls afterwards, “Don’t worry yourself so much, little brother. I know you are anticipatory about Prince Takumi’s arrival, but I don’t like seeing you fretting so much.”

“How can I not worry,” Leo murmured, “He’s too important to me not to worry about him.”

“Leo,” Xander’s voice came, soft and caring, and he knew his brother was about to start placating his worries, and maybe for once he needed it rather than going to great lengths to ignore it, “There isn’t such a need to worry, alright? I know how anticipatory you have been to see Prince Takumi again, but I assure you he will arrive here safely,” he smiled, “Truthfully, I’m quite happy for you. I’m glad you have found someone with whom to share your heart.”

“Th-thank you,” Leo mumbled out, suddenly feeling his cheeks reddening under Xander’s gladdened gaze and the peace in his words, “He really- means a lot to me.”

“There’s no need to be so _modest_ , Leo,” Xander chuckled softly, “I can see how you two looked at each other during Ryoma’s coronation and the time we spent thereafter in Hoshido. Your feelings have clearly surpassed a certain point, one that most relationships take a while to attain, and I’m happy for you,” he beamed, a look that did nothing to help Leo’s blush, “Truthfully, now that you are courting Prince Takumi,” he continued, “My advisers have been less adamant about my own eventual marriage. A king atop a throne without a queen apparently leads to much political unrest, especially among noble houses with eligible women who would certainly wish to court the bachelor king,” he sighed, resting his cheek in his palm.

“I’m glad my… my _courtship_ has given you some peace, brother,” Leo smiled softly, “Truly, I wish you were able to find love without the pressure of politics on your shoulders.”

“That was to always be my fate, Leo,” Xander said gently, acceptance in his smile, “Father was lucky to marry my mother and take a woman he loved as his bride if only for a short while, but with the state Nohr has been left in after the war, I think it’s best to do whatever is necessary for the future. I assure you that I can attain happiness just seeing you with the one you call your beloved. Knowing my taciturn little brother has grown to be a man who can love another is reward enough,” the king of Nohr smiled, his warm, brown eyes bright with a kind of light that Leo had seldom seen in his gaze during Father’s reign.

He couldn’t speak, knowing there was nothing he could say to respond appropriately to how pure and loving Xander’s words were. Since Father’s death, he felt closer to Xander, a kind of closeness he felt wasn’t available to them while Father was so hard on them as his sons, and even almost a year later Xander’s love for him still rendered him speechless.

“Why don’t we take the rest of the day off, hm?” Xander said when he failed to respond, his smile not wavering in it’s warmth, “You should ready yourself for Prince Takumi’s arrival, and it will be nice to just relax for a little while.”

“Right,” Leo finally said, giving a swift nod, “That sounds good, Xander. Thank you.” He helped Xander stack the papers that were scattered over the desk neatly before they left the office despite the protests of some of Xander’s advisers who were waiting outside the door. Xander waved them off with the decision that they would spend the rest of the day preparing to welcome Hoshidan royalty to Nohr for the first time since the war, and that seemed to make most of them back off.

As the day went on, the storm clouds on the horizon broke open, spilling heavy, wet flakes of snow quickly down onto the cold, Nohrian soil. Soon enough, the view out the windows was completely white, and as day bled into night, the weather only grew worse and there was still no sign of Takumi’s carriage.

“He should have been here by now,” Leo sighed heavily after dinner, continuing his pacing in the hall that lead to the outdoors where Takumi’s carriage should have pulled up hours before, “Something is _wrong_ , Xander, and we should go out and find him.”

“Leo,” Xander sighed gently, but Leo could hear the concern in his own voice, “I’m sure they are just slowed by the snow.”

“Maybe, maybe,” Leo muttered, “But not this slow. We should-”

“Milords!” The doors to the outdoors opened, allowing in the harsh winds and snow of the storm as two guards ran in with a man who was clearly dressed in Hoshidan attire.

“Guards,” Xander said quickly, “Who is this man?”

“King Xander, Prince Leo” the Hoshidan panted, dropping to his knees into a bow that Leo could tell was also due to the exhaustion held in each shuddering breath he took, “I was guarding Prince Takumi’s carriage. We- we became trapped in the storm. The carriage would no longer move and I was sent ahead to tell you, milords.”

“How far?” Leo asked before Xander could answer, his mind quickly working his thoughts into some sort of irrational frenzy. Nohrian storms were too rough to be trapped in for long with only a carriage as shelter, and if the guard had taken more than an hour or two to reach the castle, then there was reason to fear for Takumi’s health. Either way, he was ready to spur himself into action immediately no matter what Takumi’s guard said once he caught his breath.

“I-I suppose I- rode for an hour or so?” The guard panted, “The horse was already tired from pulling the carriage though. I am sure you could be able to reach Lord Takumi far quicker, milords. N-not to presume you would be going to fetch Lord Takumi yourselves-”

“Peace, guardsman,” Xander said gently before he motioned for a servant, “Make sure this man is warmed and taken care of, and his horse is to be put with the others in the stables and brushed down.” The servant nodded quickly, helping the Hoshidan to his feet as the guard dipped his head several times with hurried thanks leaving his lips, “Leo, ready the horses, your own and mine. I will fetch two men to bring with us. We will have to move quickly, alright?”

“Lord Xander,” the voice of one of Xander’s advisers cut in before Leo could agree, “Do you think it’s _wise_ to send a crown prince of Nohr and you, our _King,_ out into this weather?”

“Would it be more prudent to leave a Hoshidan Prince, an ally of Nohr, and a dear friend such as Prince Takumi caught out in this weather in a kingdom unknown to him with no reprieve?” Xander countered easily, “Stay your words. We’re leaving.” When Xander gave him a nod, Leo quickly rushed from the hall, heading to his own quarters first to fetch his warmest cloak. He gathered up a pair of gloves, a thick blanket, and another cloak for Takumi as well in case he needed it. Hoshido rarely got as cold as Nohr so he knew he would need to be prepared.

After, he did as Xander instructed, heading to the stables to quickly ready the horses with their gear and saddles. By the time he was finished, Xander was heading towards him through the storm, following by two knights who easily mounted their own horses in preparation for the King’s orders.

“Let’s go,” Xander nodded and Leo spurred his horse into movement. The robust nature of his horse’s body and legs put up a fight against the storm, but the blowing snow and thick accumulation on the ground was still treacherous, especially at night with only the dim light from the knights’ lanterns guiding them along.

All Leo could think about was Takumi. Even as the howling wind bit at his cheeks and chilled his skin, he could only worry for Takumi’s sake. The other prince had never been in Nohr with the intention to visit, and being trapped in the darkness during a storm wasn’t a good first experience. He forced his horse to go faster, passing Xander by a few lengths as he squinted into the blowing white and surrounding darkness.

Eventually, there was a faint light in the distance, and he could see two figures standing outside a carriage that was slightly lopsided, stuck into the heaping deposits of snow.

“Hold!” The Hoshidan guards yelled over the storm, one reaching for a the naginata on his back as Leo approached, knowing Xander and the two knights weren’t far behind.

“I am Prince Leo of Nohr,” he called, slipping off his horse easily, “My brother and I received the man you sent to us. We are here to take you and Prince Takumi to the castle.”

“Lord Leo!” the man with the naginata gasped, easily lowering the weapon, “Th-thank you, milord! Lord Takumi is inside the carriage.” With that, Leo strode past the men, pulling open the door to the carriage despite the ice that threatened to encase the handle.

“L-Leo?” There was a gasp, whispered out through lips trembling with cold, and suddenly his arms with filled with Takumi, cold and shivering against him as the snow fell fast into his hair, “Leo! Th-thank Gods,” the prince in his arms gasped out, and he could feel Takumi’s relieved, heaving breaths reverberating though his entire body.

“Takumi,” Leo sighed, easily accepting the boy into his embrace, tightly holding him against his torso, “Gods, you’re _frozen_. I got here as quickly as I could.” He cupped Takumi’s cheek in his gloved palm, drawing him up from where Takumi had buried his face in his shoulder. His face was pale, wan from the cold, and blue was starting to bleed into the edges of his lips, a sight Leo certainly wasn’t used to nor comfortable with, “Come on. Let’s get you back to the castle, okay?”

“That’s s-sounds nice,” Takumi huffed out a shivering laugh, and despite the pale coldness of his face, his eyes were bright, filled with joy. Leo knew where that light came from; he could feel it in his own chest. Just being together again, even when surrounded by swirling snow and gusting winds, they were _happy_.

And it was a sorely missed feeling.

Leo took Takumi’s cold hands into his own and led him quickly to where his horse stood. Xander and the knights had arrived by then, tending to the two Hoshidans who had been guarding Takumi. He grabbed up the cloak first to wrap it around Takumi’s shoulders, clasping it at his neck and pulling the hood over his head.

“I brought you gloves too,” Leo said loudly over the storm, handing them to Takumi only for the Hoshidan Prince to struggle with them, his fingers clearly too numbed to have their usual fine motor skills, “Here, let me,” he smiled gently, grasping Takumi’s cold hands and sliding the gloves over his skin. Lastly, he wrapped the thick blanket around Takumi’s shoulders, hiking himself up onto his horse and offering his hand to the other prince.

Takumi’s grip was weaker than he expected, numbed by the effects of the storm, but Leo pulled him up easily, grabbing him up into his arms when Takumi’s foot nearly slipped from the stirrup, “I’ve got you,” he breathed, whispered words for Takumi’s ears to catch over the howling of the storm. He held the boy he loved cradled close to his chest with one arm, grasping the horse’s reins with his other hand.

Xander and the knights were mounting their horses with the Hoshidan guards in tow, and without further delay, he snapped the reins, leaving Takumi’s carriage sunken in the snow. Xander would likely send out men to retrieve Takumi’s belongings the next day, but as long as Takumi himself was safe, Leo didn’t really care.

Takumi was shivering against his chest despite his efforts to hold the other prince in a way that shielding him from the full blast of the icy wind. His eyes were squeezed shut, his face half-hidden in the hood, and Leo could hear quiet whimpers of discontent leaving his throat even over the sounds of the storm.

“We’ll be at the castle soon, alright?” he murmured, urging his horse to go faster before he pressed a kiss to Takumi’s forehead, tightening his hold on the other boy, “I promise you that. We’ll be home soon.” He cradled Takumi closer, shielding him as well as he could from the storm with his own body. He would take all the cold and sharp, blowing snow unto himself to prevent Takumi from growing weaker.

“I’m tired,” Takumi mumbled, the quiet words barely reaching Leo’s ears before they were drowned out by the storm.

“You cannot fall asleep, Takumi,” he said sternly before he could even take a second to think, “Come on, you have to stay awake, alright? Just- talk to me. I’m here. We’re together now so just- just talk to me, okay?”

“Leo,” Takumi’s voice came a moment after and he felt the other prince shift slightly in his arms, “I missed you so much… I’m so glad we’re together.”

“I’m glad too,” Leo said, ducking his head to press a kiss to Takumi’s snow-soaked hair, “We have a lot of time together now though. Tell me, what do you want to do while you’re here?” He knew he had to keep Takumi awake in face of the storm. The other boy was clearly on the brink of giving into the cold and exhaustion, and Leo had seen so many soldiers over the years perish in Nohr’s storms in the same fashion. Takumi’s body was too cold in his arms even surrounded by blankets, and he knew they had to get to the castle quickly.

“I want to,” Takumi mumbled, his eyelids fluttering as he clearly tried to keep his eyes open, his eyelashes dusted by a few small flakes of snow, “I want to… to kiss you,” he breathed, “And wake up to you in the morning, and hold you in the night. And have you hold me too… I want to do anything and everything as long as- as long as I’m with you… And I never want to leave you again.” His words were slow, quiet and nearly drowned out by the gusting of the wind, but Leo hung onto every one of them, cradling the boy he loved even closer at the impact of his voice.

“I’m sure all that and more can be arranged,” he said, looking up after a moment to see Castle Krakenburg looming in the distance, “We’re almost back, alright? We’ll get back and you’ll be warm again, and we can do all the things you said you wanted. How does that sound?” He urged his horse to go faster with a snap of the reins, turning his face away from the blowing snow back to the boy in his arms, squeezing him briefly to implore him to answer.

“That sounds… nice,” Takumi finally sighed out, his eyes half-lidded as he clearly tried to keep himself awake, “I love you, Leo…”

“I love you too,” Leo answered back immediately, a bittersweet feeling of adoration flowing through him. He longed to hear Takumi’s proclamations of love, but seeing him in this state was unnerving and worrisome, a heavy weight on his heart. Everything would be alright when they got back though, “Just a bit more,” he breathed the words into Takumi’s hair, feeling a small nod from the prince in his arms, “Just a little more. We’re almost there.”

They reached the castle soon enough, riding up to where several guards were waiting for them. Leo heard Xander and the knights that accompanied them coming up behind him as well, but his entire focus was on Takumi.

“Takumi? We’re here now. Are you okay?” He gave the other boy a gentle shake, getting a tiny nod in return.

“Leo,” Xander was at his side a moment later, offering up a strong arm to help Takumi from the saddle, “Is he alright? Come, quickly. We must get inside.” Leo nodded urgently, lowering Takumi into Xander’s waiting hold before he dismounted his horse. He handed the reins of the exhausted animal off to a guard before he once more accepted Takumi into his own arms. Even wrapped in blankets, he could feel the cold all around Takumi’s body and he rushed inside with Xander as the guards opened the doors.

The warm air inside the castle was a welcome feeling against his chilled skin, and his sisters were all there waiting for him in various states of worry.

“Takumi!” Corrin’s voice called first, rushing to his side, “Is he alright, Leo?” she gasped, worry etched into her features, Camilla and Elise following her closely.

“I’m fine,” Takumi’s voice came then, trembling with shivers as his eyes fluttered open, “Leo, you can put me down now. I’m okay.”

“Not a chance,” Leo huffed, “You’re frozen and soaked. I’m taking you to warm up and that’s that,” he said firmly before he looked to the maids gathered about, “Have fresh blankets laid out in my quarters, and make the fire as warm as possible.” The maids gave him quick nods before running off in the direction of his own quarters and, with slower steps due to the prince in his arms, he followed.

By the time he got to his quarters, the maids were finished with the preparations. A roaring fire was crackling in the fire place and a stack of thick blankets sat near the fire, warming from the heat of the blaze. He spoke briefly with the maids about bringing some warm soup in later before he dismissed them and turned his attention back to Takumi.

“Is this your room?” Takumi’s voice spoke up when the door had closed behind them.

“It is,” Leo smiled, moved to set the Hoshidan prince down on the edge of the bed, “Let’s get you out of these clothes and warmed up, okay?”

“Okay,” Takumi nodded, a sleepy smile slipping over his face as Leo lowered the hood from his head, “You too… Your clothes are soaked, and you can’t exactly be warm either.”

“You’re right,” Leo laughed then, noting the cold dampness of his cloak and other garments that stuck to his chilled skin, “But you first… Your lips,” he reached and grazed his thumb over Takumi’s mouth slowly, “They’re nearly blue, you know.”

“Alright,” Takumi consented, reaching up with clumsy gloved fingers to try and unclasp the cloak around his neck, his brows furrowing when his numbed digits couldn’t unfasten the clasp.

“I’ve got it,” Leo said quickly, reaching forward to undo the clasp and pull away the soaked cloak and blanket from around Takumi’s shoulders before he slipped the gloves from his cold hands, “Let me take care of you. You’re my honored guest after all.” He saw the way Takumi’s cheeks flushed slightly as his words and he couldn’t help but to lean in and kiss his cold lips.

Despite the numbness he was undoubtedly feeling, Takumi kissed him back, leaning into him as he kissed him for the first time in too long. Kissing Takumi felt like coming home again, and having Takumi in his arms, in his quarters, in the kingdom he called home just made everything feel so _right_. By the time he pulled away, pinkness had started to bleed back into Takumi’s lips. The soft skin was licked wet and his lips parted as he breathed slowly after the fact.

“I’ve missed you so much,” Takumi finally said, his words all coming out in a rush of air before a hard shiver wracked his body.

“I have missed you too,” Leo said automatically as he reached forward, gently tugging up the hem of Takumi’s shirt as he lifted it over the other boy’s head, mussing his ponytail beyond saving in the process. He reached for the ribbon that secured Takumi’s hair, tugging it away to let his snow-dampening locks fall free, “Let me get you some of my clothes to wear,” he offered, turning away to his drawers as Takumi loosened the ties on his damp pants. He brought Takumi a new pair of slacks to wear, moving to get the stack of blankets while the other prince redressed himself.

“Your turn,” Takumi huffed at Leo when he moved the blankets to the bed, “You’re soaked too.”

“Alright, alright,” Leo nodded, tugging off his cloak and pulling his shirt over his head and tossing it into the pile of other soggy garments. After, he reached for the first blanket on the stack, unfolding it and throwing it around Takumi’s shoulders, noticing the hard shiver the other prince gave at the touch of warm fabric, “Let’s get into the bed, hm? The maids will be by with some food soon. You must be hungry.”

“S-starving,” Takumi shivered, gripping at the blanket as Leo moved onto the bed, grabbing the other blankets and settling against the pillows. He wrapped a blanket around his own shoulders, accepting Takumi into his arms when the other boy came over, nestling close to him. His skin was still cold to the touch, but slowing warming from the heat of the fire and added blankets.

“I have wanted to have you here for so long,” Leo breathed, stroking his fingers through some light tangles in Takumi’s hair before he simply wrapped his arms around the boy he loved, rubbing slow circles into his arms to warm him, “Don’t think I’m going to let you leave my bed anytime soon,” he hummed, pressing his lips to Takumi’s temple and then to the shell of his ear.

“I don’t have any intention of trying to leave you arms,” Takumi giggled, leaning into his lips, “I welcome your secretive doting nature,” he smiled, “It’s just for me, isn’t that right?”

“That’s correct,” Leo laughed, nuzzling into Takumi’s hair before he pressed a kiss just behind his ear where he knew Takumi was sensitive.

“Leo!” Takumi squeaked in surprise, his shoulders coming up as he craned his neck to the side a bit, laughter starting to bubble from his chest, “S-stop that!”

“Mm… No, I’m fine like this,” Leo teased back easily, pressing slow, soft kisses to Takumi’s ear and neck until the boy in his arms was giggling uncontrollably, his eyes closed into the bright expression on his face. There was a smile on his lips, one that was so bright and dear to Leo’s heart, one that he had ached and longed to see for months. And now seeing it, a light feeling burst inside his chest, and he knew Takumi could feel it too.

He reached and slid his hand up, pressing his palm to Takumi’s chest to feel the steady beating of his heart. His skin was warming again, no longer icy and cold to the touch, and that made most of Leo’s worries ebb away, allowing pure love to swallow his soul.

Eventually, there was a knock at the door and Leo called for whomever it was to enter. Two maids came into the room carrying a tray of steaming soup and tea, leaving the food besides the bed and bowing before they left.

“I see you two have made yourselves comfortable,” Xander’s voice came as he entered after the maids had left.

“King Xander,” Takumi straightened in his arms, pulling up the blankets a bit to cover his bare chest, “Thank you for your hospitality in letting me stay in Nohr, and thank you for riding out to my carriage in this weather. I am truly in your debt.”

“Nonsense,” Xander laughed when Takumi dipped his head into a bow, “You are our guest here and a Prince of Hoshido. My actions were not above and beyond what was necessary, and judging from the relationship you have with my little brother, perhaps it would be best if you just referred to me by my name, Takumi.”

“A-ah, if you insist, _Xander_ ,” Takumi said a bit slowly, and Leo could see bashfulness pinking his cheeks.

“I will send several men out come morning to fetch your belonging in your carriage,” Xander smiled, “As for now, I urge you to rest. You must be tired after that ordeal.”

“Yes, thank you,” Takumi said with a smile, a smile Leo wanted to kiss from his lips, but it would be too embarrassing in front of Xander.

Xander bid them good night before he left the room, leaving them alone once more, and Leo allowed himself to kiss Takumi’s cheek before he pulled over the tray of soup and tea, settling it into the blankets around them.

“You need to eat,” Leo said, handing Takumi a spoon, “I had dinner earlier, but I’ll eat some after. I want to make sure you’re okay.”

“Leo,” Takumi huffed, “I’m fine now. You’ve done a wonderful job of getting me warm again.” Though there was care in Takumi’s words and warmth bleeding from his once frozen skin, Leo still felt a small knot of worry deep in his heart.

“I was worried,” Leo whispered into Takumi’s shoulder, feeling the warm brush of smooth skin against his lips, “I was so worried… I kept thinking about- about if I _lost_ you, if you had perished, if I couldn’t _save_ you-”

“Leo, _Leo_ ,” Takumi cut him often soothingly, twisting in his arms to face him more, “I would not let something as trivial as a snowstorm keep me from seeing you again,” he murmured, and Leo felt Takumi’s careful fingers stroking his cheeks and through his hair, “I will never stop fighting to stay with you for as long as we have. I don’t want to see another lonely night without you at my side for as long as we have here, and I would do whatever it takes in the future to be with you. So please, don’t worry so much. I’m here and I am perfectly fine.” Takumi’s words made so much sense, but the irrationality of his worries hadn’t let him see them before. From Takumi’s lips though, he could always see the truth and he gave a soft nod, leaning into Takumi’s hands.

“I still want you to eat first,” Leo murmured, gesturing the to bowl of soup.

“If you insist,” Takumi laughed, leaning to nuzzle their noses together before he turned back to the soup. Leo busied himself with simply holding Takumi while the Hoshidan Prince ate, and he followed to eat a small bit when the boy in his arms was done.

It was quiet after that, the fire the only light in the room as they laid in bed side-by-side, held in each others arms. Takumi fell asleep first, clearly worn out from the day’s events, and Leo stayed away a bit longer to just take in his sleeping face before he too succumbed to sleep.

* * *

 

Takumi was usually an early riser, but when Leo woke to small rays of weak sunlight coming through the drapes and falling onto Takumi’s still-sleeping face he knew how tired the other prince truly had been after the ordeal the night before.

He passed the time before Takumi awoke by simply holding him, stroking careful fingers through his hair and against his sleep-warm skin. Waking besides Takumi after so long was like a dream, but he knew he was awake and he knew that the warm presence in his arms was real.

Eventually, Takumi shifted, a soft sound leaving his throat as his eyelids fluttered, opening sleepily to greet the day.

“Good morning,” Leo said on-command, leaning to kiss Takumi’s forehead, “Did you sleep well?”

“Mmm… Yes,” Takumi sighed, “Better than I have in a while… It’s not the same when you’re not there.” Leo forced away the frown that wanted to come to his lips at that. He knew of Takumi’s nightmares; the other prince had written him long letters that he composed in the early hours of the morning after being woken from whatever horrors liked to plague him. Often he could see where the ink had smudged, stained by water he knew had been shed from Takumi’s eyes. The thought of Takumi being scared and alone was truly wretched, but he couldn’t feel anything other than content in that moment.

“Well,” he hummed in return, “What do you say to going around the grounds with me today?” he asked, “It seems like it’s a decent day weather-wise, and I would rather you see Nohr on a day when the sun is visible rather than in the darkness.”

“That sounds nice,” Takumi smiled, his amber eyes illuminated by the faint sunlight from the windows, “Though, I would be happy seeing Nohr anytime if you were at my side.”

“Takumi,” Leo couldn’t help but laugh at just how incredibly loving the other prince was, “I’m going to kiss you.” Takumi’s eyes lit up in response and Leo leaned in, claiming his supple lips with only sweet, slow passion; nothing hot and heavy was even necessary in that moment.

They kissed until the maids came knocking at the door to offer breakfast. Takumi seemed excited to get outside so they ate and dressed quickly. Takumi’s clothes were all still packed in his stranded carriage so Leo loaned him some of his own, making sure he was dressed warmly enough for the Nohrian winter with gloves and a scarf wrapped snugly around his neck.

After that, he grabbed up the bag he had prepared to hold two pairs of ice skates and the tome he had found in the library and took Takumi’s hand, leading him out of the warm castle into the cold. It was a frigid day, but the sun was weakly shining in the sky, and the freshly fallen snow all around them was gleaming a bright, sparkling white.

“It’s so _beautiful_ out here,” Takumi finally spoke up when they were halfway to the frozen pond Leo had prepared, “I have never seen this much snow. It’s incredible.” When Leo turned his head to look at him, all he saw was pure wonder reflected in Takumi’s wide, amber eyes. He was gazing all around them, clearly taking in everything he could of the winter landscape, but all Leo wanted to imprint to memory was the sheer awe on Takumi’s face. In the soft light of the winter sun and with white all around them, Takumi looked even more beautiful than usual, and certainly more beautiful than the snow with how the rays of light were refracting through the silvery color of his long hair. The sight was worth the long months of waiting to be with Takumi again, and he wouldn’t trade it for anything the world could offer him.

“We’re here,” he said when they reached the pond he had prepared, though the surface of it was covered in all the snow that had fallen the night before. It was a quick fix though; one spell from the tome would easily do it.

“Where exactly?” Takumi asked, blinking around at the area with curiosity in his eyes.

“Just hold on a moment,” Leo said as he opened the bag, pulling out the tome and flipping it open the right page. He cast a quick incantation, forcing the snow off the sleekness of prepared ice and a small area besides it to Takumi’s wonder. He heard a gasp from the boy besides him and he couldn’t even put the tome away before Takumi’s arms were wrapped around him.

“Is this an _ice skating_ pond?” Takumi asked brightly before he laughed with glee, “You did this for _me_ , Leo?”

“Of course I did,” Leo laughed, settling a hand into Takumi’s hair, “You were so earnest in your letter. I even bought you some skates.” He reached for the bag, setting the tome back inside before he drew out the two pairs of skates, “You just lace them like regular boots,” he explained, moving the cleared ground where they could sit and put on the skates. Takumi’s excitement was evident in the way his fingers moved, quickly lacing the skates like he had done it so many times in the past.

He stood and offered a hand to Takumi, and the other prince easily took it, already slightly wobbly on the skates even before Leo led him to the ice.

“I won’t let you fall,” Leo said before he could stop himself, but from the relief that came into Takumi’s eyes, he was glad he had said it, “Just hold tight to my hands, and don’t try to do anything too spectacular.” Takumi nodded, his grip tight on Leo’s fingers as Leo walked them carefully onto the ice, pushing off against the slick surface to give them some momentum. Takumi gasped when they moved, the sound of it laced with delight as they skated across the ice, the surface of it without a single imperfection that could allow Takumi to trip.

“This is _amazing_ , Leo,” Takumi breathed, his eyes on his feet before he looked up, the wind of their movement tousling his hair as he smiled, wide and bright and so alive it made Leo’s heart sing, “I can’t believe you did all this for me.”

“Why wouldn’t I?” Leo shrugged easily, skating them carefully around the edges of the rink, “I would do anything for you. Your happiness is my happiness after all.”

“ _Leo_ ,” Takumi sighed his name, a kind of breathless adoration in his voice, and Leo couldn’t help but bring them to a slow stop, pulling Takumi into his arms just to hold him. Takumi’s clothes were cold, and his cheeks and the tip of his nose were pink from the biting force of the wind, but his breath was warm and his eyes were so _bright_.

Leo kissed him, drawing him close so he could hold him tight, kissing him with fire enough to melt the ice they were on should it become material in form. Takumi reciprocated easily, leaning into him, but not with enough vigor to lose their balance and push them to the ice. He felt fingers tangling into his hair as Takumi’s mouth opened against him, His lips were chilled, but his tongue and mouth were warm to the touch, hot even, burning with the desire he felt in his own body.

He could feel Takumi’s passion in his chest, strong and scorching, warming him from the inside out. His curled his thumb and index finger over the cold shell of Takumi’s ear, caressing the tender skin slowly to warm him there, never losing his pull in their kiss all the while.

Eventually, he separated from Takumi’s mouth to breath, letting his breath ghost over Takumi’s own parted lips. His lips were reddening a bit to match his cheeks, and Leo figured he looked about the same.

“Shall we skate more?” He whispered, and he saw and felt Takumi nod from where he still cupped his head in his gloved palm.

They skated slowly, carefully, and he was patient still, allowing Takumi to configure himself on the new surface. Takumi took to the activity quickly. He was so skilled in everything he did, even if he couldn’t always see it himself, and when he let go of one of Leo’s hands to guide himself a bit more, Leo was proud. He hoped Takumi could feel that pride, that admiration coming from him. The happiness that consumed all of Takumi’s features was enough.

It would always be enough.

Takumi’s happiness was his most favorite thing other than the Hoshidan Prince himself.

When the sun started to sink past it’s highest point in the sky, Leo could tell Takumi was tiring, holding tightly to his arms again for support. Without words, he led him to the edge of the rink, and Takumi followed easily. They took of their skates and Leo packed them up before walking from the pond hand-in-hand with Takumi once more.

“Oh! Wait!” Takumi gasped when they were trudging through the snow-covered field back to the castle, “I want to try something!” He gasped in delight, “I saw this in a book once,” he explained earnestly as he moved a bit away from Leo. Leo watched him with confusion in his eyes before Takumi moved to lay in the deep snow, gasping when the cold flakes fell through his scarf onto exposed skin, “You move your arms and legs and then when you get up, it looks like an angel!” Takumi looked up at him for approval.

“Oh, right,” Leo smiled, setting the bag in his hand down into the snow, watching Takumi with a bemused smile, “Elise loves snow angels. Well, go ahead,” he laughed, “Show me.”

“Okay!” Takumi grinned before he started to move his arms and legs inwards and outwards in repeated motions, moving the thick snow as he did so. Leo laughed as he watched the snow fall onto the other prince, the depth of it too much for easy movement, “Don’t laugh!” Takumi huffed, sputtering a bit when snow fell onto his lips, “Come make one with me! Please Leo?”

“Fine, fine,” Leo smiled, moving to lay back in the cold, wetness of the snow at Takumi’s side, reaching to clasp his hand, “We’ll make it together then.”

“Perfect,” Takumi smiled before he turned his gaze back to the sky, starting to move his arms and legs once more and Leo followed along. Truthfully, he hadn’t played in the snow in such a way since he was a child, a child with a Father who would still lift him up onto his shoulders. Whenever he frequented the outdoors in the winter for the purpose of playing, it would be to watch and sometimes help Elise as she made snowmen before she got cold and bored.

This was entirely different though.

With Takumi, he felt like a child again.

Before the pressures of war and death and turmoil had eaten away at him.

Before his duties to Nohr and to Xander had busied him.

Before he had any care in the world but to make snow angels with his brothers and sisters.

Now his only care was to make them with Takumi, and that was even more thrilling than it was in childhood.

When Leo was sure they had done an adequate job in moving the snow aside into the correct shape, he sat up, dragging a hand from the back of his head down to his waist to wipe off the snow that had stuck to him. Takumi made no move to sit up, his eyes fixed on the sky as he lay in the snow, the whiteness of it dusting his clothes and skin and hair.

If they were making snow angels, then the epitome of one would be Takumi in that moment, covering in a light layer of flakes that sparkled with the sun.

Carefully he moved to sit over Takumi, hovering above him so he could take in the way he looked and store it in his memory. Takumi’s bangs were damp, small flakes of snow resting gently in his hair, much of which had come free of his ponytail. His cheeks were rosy and his eyes calm, half-lidded in contentment. There were droplets of water on his cheeks and neck, evidence of how the heat of his skin had melted the snow that had fallen there.

He was breathtaking, and he definitely deserved to know.

“What is it, Leo?” Takumi murmured, pulling him from his trance.

“It’s just that,” Leo took a breath, letting air flood into his lungs and then out again, “You look so beautiful… Like an angel yourself.” He watched as a deeper redness spread over Takumi’s features, but the Hoshidan Prince didn’t bashfully look away as he had typically done in the past. Instead, he just leaned up, pressing a light kiss to Leo’s own cold lips, and Leo could feel his smile through the movement.

“I love you,” Takumi whispered against his lips, and even when he had heard the words spoken and read them written so many times, it still felt like new.

Takumi’s love would always feel new, like a breath of fresh air, like he was coming out of a fog to accept the sun, like he was lost and suddenly he had become found. Takumi’s words would always find him no matter what, and they would always feel like the most wonderful paroxysm of emotion that he could garner from their shared hearts and shared souls.

He didn’t speak because he didn’t have to. He just pressed their bodies together and kissed Takumi, swift and soft, several times until his heart had calmed a bit, steadied to a normal beat that he knew Takumi could feel even through their layers of clothes.

“Want to head back?” he asked after several long moments, “I don’t know about you, but I’m starving.”

“Mhm, me too,” Takumi hummed in agreement, “I want to try more Nohrian food.”

“I’m sure that can be arranged.” Leo moved carefully to not ruin the shapes they had made in the snow, offering his hand to Takumi to help him up. After they stood, brushing snow from clothes and hair, Leo watched as Takumi turned, stopping when his eyes fell onto the joined angels in the snow.

“They’re really- pretty,” Takumi said softly, and Leo felt his fingers squeezing his own just a bit, but he squeezed back nonetheless, “Like the two of us, intertwined… Bound by nature itself.”

“Yes,” Leo breathed out, his heart suddenly picking up at Takumi’s words, and when he looked to the side amber eyes were on him, gentle and knowing, “Are you happy?” he asked quietly, and it was a loaded question, more than an inquiry about mere happiness, and from the look that came over Takumi’s face he knew that the Hoshidan Prince knew it too.

“I am,” Takumi dipped his head in a small nod, “With you, with us,” he paused, “With- with myself. Everything is _brighter_ now.” When he spoke, he smiled, a soft expression but his eyes gleamed with the dying light from the feeble winter sun, and Leo knew he didn’t have to say anything more. He hoisted the bag he brought up off the ground and squeezed Takumi’s hand before they started the walk back to the castle.

When back at the castle, they changed out of soggy clothes and joined Xander, Camilla, Corrin, and Elise for a quiet dinner. Takumi’s capability with Nohrian utensils was next to nothing, and while it was amusing to see him fumble with a fork and knife, Leo naturally helped him with it. Takumi had done the same for him in Hoshido with chopsticks, though that day seemed so long ago.

It had been before he knew Takumi loved him, before he knew Takumi had forgiven him. He hadn’t known the feeling of Takumi’s lips nor hands, nor the warmth of him in his arms, nor the light of him in the morning air of whatever room they woke up in, whether it be in Nohr or Hoshido.

Everything was different from that time, and it was a good different, the best kind of change.

“Chopsticks are far more practical,” Takumi huffed under his breath as he jabbed a fork into a piece of meat, a pout on his lips before he raised the food to his mouth.

“Practical?” Leo asked out, raising as eyebrow as Takumi bit the meat off his fork, “You can’t even _cut_ anything with them. How is that practical?”

“Well, maybe _Hoshidan_ food in general is more practical,” Takumi huffed lightly, “And you don’t have to go through the trouble of making food into smaller pieces just so you can eat it. It’s already prepared like that.”

“Maybe Hoshidans are just _lazy_ ,” Leo teased, smirking at the look of incredulity that came over Takumi’s features.

“You’re going to want to take that back,” Takumi said slowly before he smiled cheekily, “If you have any intention of sharing a bed with me later.”

“Alright, alright,” Leo laughed, reaching to squeeze Takumi’s hand under the table, “I apologize… Neither you nor your people are lazy, but especially not you,” he murmured, leaning to kiss Takumi’s cheek.

“Big brother!” Elise gasped from across the table, “No kissing at dinner!”

“Now, now, Elise,” Camilla crooned, “Let them be. It’s nice seeing them so in _love_.”

“Camilla!” Leo sputtered, feeling his cheeks flushing red, “That’s not-!”

“Your attempt at modesty is adorable, baby brother,” Camilla teased, her violet eyes sparkling under the light of the chandelier in the dining room, “You two are _so_ cute.”

“Th-thank you, Lady Camilla,” Takumi managed to mumble at his side, and when Leo looked over at him his cheeks were as red as his own.

“Oh, _please_ , Takumi,” Camilla laughed, “There’s no need for any of that. You’re practically my little brother too by now, isn’t that right?” The look she gave Leo then was peculiar, some sort of deeply knowing smile he didn’t even think he could decipher, as if she knew something he had yet to discover.

“That’s enough teasing, Camilla,” Xander spoke up, a bemused smile on his face at the head of the table, “I think I’m going to turn in,” he sighed, his chair scraped against the floor as he stood, “Good night.”

Once Xander had left the table, everyone else seemed to follow suit, and once Takumi was done struggling with the Nohrian cutlery enough to eat all he wanted, they left too.

They retreated to the baths, spending what Leo surmised to be nearly an hour soaking in the hot water. It was quiet aside from the sounds of water dripping and the soft sighs of contentment that left Takumi’s lips whenever Leo leaned to kiss him. It was only the first full day of nearly a month they had to spend together, and if every day could proceed like the current day had gone, Leo knew he could never be unhappy.

Takumi’s clothes and other articles had been brought earlier that day from the carriage by the guards, and subsequently left in Leo’s quarters rather than going to the trouble of preparing guest quarters that Takumi wouldn’t even be using. He supposed that had been Xander’s doing, but he was too tired to become flustered by the notion of it.

The fire breathed heat into the room as they sat in front of it after the bath, surrounded by several blankets. Takumi’s head was in his lap, his long hair splayed out to dry by the fire’s light. He had a book in his own hand, reading as he idly stroked his fingers through Takumi’s hair. When he looked down to the boy in his lap after a while, Takumi’s gaze was on the fire, the glowing embers reflecting into his amber eyes. His lips were working along the gold surface of the ring Leo had slipped onto his finger in Hoshido, and then again a few moments earlier after they had exited the bath. He looked lost in thought and Leo let him be, turning his attention back to his reading.

It was nice like this, quaint and simple. They were together, alive and warmed by the waves of heat coming from the fire. If he could end every night of his life like this, Leo knew he would have found a utopia on Earth.

“Hey Leo?” Takumi’s voice came a little while later, quiet and sleepy in the dim light of the room.

“Hm?” he hummed in response, his gaze still on his book, half his attention to the boy whose head was in his lap.

“I want to marry you.”

The words struck him, severed his attention from the words on the pages of the book in his hand, and he nearly dropped the book in shock. He looked down then at Takumi’s face, his eyes wide as he took in the sight before him. Takumi’s face was painted by the light of the fire, the golden light spread over his features and filling his eyes and his smile so easily, changing the color of his hair from silver to gold in some places. His eyes were half-lidded, his lips curved into an adoring smile.

“What?” Leo managed to ineloquently choke out, his hand suddenly shaking as he set the book down, dropping his fingers into Takumi’s hair to try and still his nervous tremors.

“I want to marry you,” Takumi repeated easily as if it was _nothing_ , like a statement one would say every day so casually, “Whenever you’re ready… I want you to marry me.”

Leo couldn’t speak, his throat choked up and his mouth dry, but he managed to give Takumi a short nod and that seemed to satisfy the other prince as he turned his gaze back to the flickering flames in the fireplace.

Takumi wanted to _marry_ him.

Takumi wanted them to be _wed_. He wanted them to exchange rings and vows at a wedding, and then become _eternal_.

The thought of made his heart race faster than whenever he had thought about it before. Now he had Takumi’s consent, Takumi’s desire and want, and he would make it happen. He would have to make it happen.

“I want to marry you too,” he whispered into the room, but there was no response from the boy in his lap, and when he looked down he noticed that Takumi’s eyes were closed, his chest rising and falling in the calm rhythm of sleep. He knew Takumi was tired out from the day, and he truly didn’t have the heart to wake him up so they could go to bed. Instead, he slipped his arms easily under Takumi’s body, holding him to his chest as he stood, carefully as not to jostle the prince in his arms.

He laid Takumi in the sheets, pulling the blankets over him before he slipped into the bed at his side. Takumi’s words before had rid him of any tiredness in the moment, and instead he was content to hold Takumi close while the fire flickered faint, golden light through the room.

In the private darkness of his quarters, with the boy he loved in his arms, he felt the prickling of tears starting in his eyes, tears of gladness and gratitude.

Before he fell asleep, he tipped his head back, whispering quiet thanks to the Gods.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THERE IT DONE ;A; Leo got me angsting so much this is more than double what Takumi's pov was oh lordy
> 
> Anywayyyy, yeah it done *throws confetti* I have the general direction of part 3 planned out too! It'll just be a bit in the future in Leo's pov of what this epilogue basically set up (marriage.....hhhhh)
> 
> Aaaand that's it! As always, comments and kudos make me cry, and thank you so so so so so much for reading all the way to the end of this mess //w\\\ it really means so much to me that people even take the time to read what I write so thank you so much!!
> 
> You can always find me on twitter [@leokuumi](https://twitter.com/leokuumi) and on tumblr [here at carbonfootprintao3](carbonfootprintao3.tumblr.com)!!! 
> 
> Thank you so much again and see ya next time!!! ;w;/" <3

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on tumblr ar carbonfootprintao3.tumblr.com and on twitter @leokuumi !!! uwu


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